Fallen Angel Broken Song
Banner by Marauder by Midnight What if... Edward wasn't as strong as we thought he was? ***Eclipse References***
Rating 4.5/5 Word Count 1274 Review this Chapter
Rosalie waited patiently while I fed, marveling at the way I quickly killed and drained two deer, saying a type of grace for each. It wasn’t my fault that my conscience was still so fresh in my mind. I hadn’t been a vampire long enough to forget my humanity, as I knew I would. Standing from where I crouched over my kill, I felt a presence standing near me, and it wasn’t Rose’s.
“Very nice Bella,” came the now familiar voice.
I whirled around, baring my teeth at the sight of the vampire who stood a few yards off, watching. He was slim and of average height, with pale skin and messy bronze hair. A lop-sided grin broke over his face as he watched me appraise him.
“But you could do much better,” he grinned, taking a step towards me.
“Stay away from me,” I snarled. “How…”
“You told me to get out of your head, Bella,” he replied. “So I am.”
I snarled, even more loudly now, because I was frightened. “You’re not real Anthony!”
“Aren’t I,” he asked. Rushing forward, he grabbed my forearm before I could retract, a very real, bruising grip. “I am what you want me to be!”
“Bella,” Rosalie called, appearing suddenly through the trees where she had stepped away as I fed, “What’s going on?”
“I’m not what you think Bella,” Anthony whispered, his face suddenly gentle. “Give me a chance.”
Instantly he was gone, not even leaving a descent wisp of smoke behind. I quickly swiveled around, searching for him, but he wasn’t there.
“Did you see him?” I asked Rosalie, almost frantically. “Did you see him?”
“Who?” she asked, clearly baffled.
I hesitated, my arm still throbbing from his crushing grip. “My librarian,” I answered.
I turned what Bella had said over and over in my mind as my family regrouped and split into their separate cars. I watched in silence as she stepped over to Emmett, spoke to him quietly a moment, and then came back over to me.
“Can I ride with you for a while?” she asked.
“Sure,” I replied, climbing into my convertible.
She followed suit, and I caught Emmett staring at me as we pulled out onto the path, heading back toward the front of the park. I had to crack a little smile. The thought of him trying to puzzle me out, though sad, was funny to think about. And I did love him.
Carlisle’s car led the way, and soon we were speeding along the freeway again. It felt strange to be sitting so near to Bella on the car’s leather seat. I was beginning to like her, as I had always thought I would but she confused me.
“Bella,” I asked, “can I ask you something personal?”
“Of course,” she answered.
“I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Right now, I don’t think you can Rosalie.”
“Well, how… how do you feel about… about this?” It was the only way that I could say what it was that I was trying to say. Confusing, huh!
Bella sighed quietly, then was silent a moment, composing her thoughts.
“The truth?” she said, “I’m angry Rose. No, I pissed beyond belief. My life, everything I loved, it’s all gone. Destroyed. I am carrying the secrets of life around in my head, and I’m still so completely lost that I can’t think.”
I glanced over at her, but her head hung limp in her hands.
“Sometimes,” I ventured, “I feel the same way. I can’t handle what happened to me, what I am. But I guess it’s a little different. All of us, my family, we had no lives left when we were changed. It was the only thing we could do.”
“Rose,” she asked, “can I ask you something personal now?”
“Sure,” I smiled, feeling that this was important.
“Did you ever… did you ever kill anyone?”
A heavy weight seemed to settle in my chest. This was the hardest part of our existence, a part that I would have to somehow explain.
“Yes, Bella, I have. I’ve never changed anyone, but I have killed before.”
I paused a moment, collecting my thoughts.
“Carlisle is the only one of us that I’m certain has never killed anyone. He specializes in healing, in the change. But I think that the rest of us, we’ve all done it. Emmett says that we all fall off the wagon sometimes. That we can’t avoid it.”
She was silent, staring straight ahead out the window.
“Bella,” I said quietly, “are you planning to stay with us?”
“Yes,” she answered. “I have to. I need to stay away from people for a while, to collect myself.”
“Then can I suggest something? I know you won’t like it, but…”
“Go ahead,” she replied.
“Edward is going to be around. I’m sure that Carlisle isn’t going to let him take off again. You need to go easy on him.”
She was tensing up, her eyes glazing with anger. I knew that if I waited too long, she wasn’t even going to hear me, so I hurried on.
“He just like all of us. It wasn’t his fault what happened, not really. He’s not evil, just… a fallen angel.”
“And I saw a star fall from the heavens unto the earth,” she murmured quietly.
“What?” I asked, startled.
“Revelations 9:1,” she replied. “Lucifer’s fall from grace.”
I vaguely remembered this theme from the bible, but none of us were very religious. I decided to let it go, but Bella started talking again.
“Alice doesn’t like me.”
I snorted. “Alice is… I don’t really know how to describe her. If you want to get to the bottom of that, you’ll have to talk to her.”
“Or Jasper,” she said quietly.
I shrugged, then pulled off onto an exit behind Carlisle’s car.
I finally admitted it to myself. I was about to go through hell. The pain that I had felt when I was last near Edward was horrendous, and that would just be a taster of what I was about to face. I began to count them off in my head, so I could be prepared.
Edward would be hurt, and surprised, no doubt. Bella and Rose seemed furious. Emmett, confused. Carlisle and Esme, concerned. Alice… Alice I couldn’t tell. She was carefully remaining calm, thought I knew that under the surface, her emotions were probably boiling. And scared. No doubt that everyone would be scared.
It was dark now, my headlights cutting through the night. The result of speeding along a highway all day came in the form of my pulling into Tanya’s driveway, just around twelve hours after we had left Forks behind. Everyone was already parked, and I was the last one to step out of my car.
Our family, minus Edward, plus Bella, collected into a group on the lawn, a total of seven. Carlisle stepped toward me, looking concerned. He placed a hand on my shoulder, a grip that I found slightly nerve-wracking at present.
“Are you ready for this?” he asked me.
He knew how this was going to feel for me, and I could only nod in response. As one amorphous mass, we started toward the door of the large house that sat before us, the lights in the windows gleaming out at us like eyes in the dark. I wasn’t surprised when the front door was practically run down by Tanya and her sisters. In that quarter of a millisecond, three things happened; the questions started, the emotions exploded, and I collapsed into a pair of expectant arms.
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