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Loving Again

"I thought I loved him, but he had to break my heart for me to know what true love really is." Edward never comes back and Bella is left alone in Forks. 10 years later vampire Bella meets Edward again in a small classroom in the middle of nowhere. But there's a little catch... Bella has changed, internally and externally. She is no longer the self-sacrificing, clumsy girl Edward fell in love with. She goes by the name Anna. This time Bella- no Anna- has a secret, but what happens when the truth is revealed?  Banner by the absolutely amazing Vatina!


3. Finally

Rating 5/5   Word Count 1377   Review this Chapter

“I don’t know why… I just couldn’t face you- I wasn’t ready for things to go back to the way they were,” I stuttered, my hands clutching my forearms. Edward refused to look at me and it took me all the will power in the world not to just grab his face and yell at him to understand. I kept this secret for months, and now it was out in the open. Just hanging there, ready to drop on our heads and crush us. It was my entire fault, and I knew it. I just should have walked strait out of that classroom as soon as I saw him. This all could have been avoided-even if I would have regretted it for the rest of my existence.

Edward was still staring off into space and I was getting anxious. His face was blank, void of all emotion. It was unnerving, not knowing if the love of my life -existence- was going to either reject or accept me. I had done so much harm already. I lied to him countless times and sent his whole world and everything he knew spinning- ready to crash at any moment. I didn’t deserve him- not in the least.

“You know,” Edward whispered, some emotion finally coming back to his face. “I’m actually starting to think that vampires can sleep,” he said. I blinked a few times, confused by his comment. “How else could this happen?” he asked, a small smile forming on his face. “And here I thought that I was going insane.” He closed his eyes briefly and then opened them again, looking surprised when I was still standing there. “I must have a pretty good imagination,” he choked out, his smile turning quickly into a frown. “How can this actually be real?” he asked. His face tensed up, like he was holding something in. He rubbed his temple, trying to regain control of himself. I just stood there, frozen with horror. I had no idea what to do.

“This is…” he shuddered, his whole face covered with his hands. My body seemed to break out of it’s gridlock, then. I slowly lifted my hand and placed it on his shoulder. He looked up at me, one of his hands sliding over mine and then grasping it. The whole world started to spin, electric currents running through the air. Nothing I ever felt before could compare.

“Edward,” I whispered, pulling myself close to him. I wrapped my hands around his waist and he did the same to me. It felt so good, after begin so distant from him, to be so close. I sighed, letting my weight collapse on him. My legs weren’t able to support me any longer.

“You’re actually here,” he gasped in wonderment. I nodded, closing my eyes. “My Bella,” he sobbed, holding me even closer. I nodded my head in a frenzy, letting all of my emotions out. Relief, exhaustion, pure happiness…

“My Edward,” I chuckled, my hoarse voice cracking halfway through his name. He just smiled and ran his hand through my hair. It was perfect, both if us standing there, our reunion that was due for months. It was a little overwhelming. Almost too much for me, defiantly too much for Edward. He fell backwards with me landing right on top of him. I looked at him worriedly, but only saw him looking up at the sky, deep in thought.

I laid next to him for several minutes, waiting for him to break the silence. But I was content in just laying there, looking at him. I felt like a man dying of thirst in the desert grasping a cold cup of water. It was so long since I was able to be near him as myself- as Bella Swan.

“You didn’t really answer my earlier question,” Edward suddenly announced, breaking me out of my reverie. I looked at him startled, waiting for him to elaborate. He chuckled at my expression. “Why you decided to play dress up for the past several weeks,” he explained. I was surprised that he said it so lightly, especially after finding out that I-being Bella- was still alive and pretending to be someone else completely. It was actually an awkward circumstance, but hey, I was the Queen of things Awkward and Weird.

I exhaled slowly, wondering how I was going to answer his question. ‘I don’t know’ didn’t seem very adequate. He watched me as I gathered all of my thoughts together. He was being extremely patient, something that surprised me. After living in a lie for several weeks, one was supposed to have a fit.

“Well,” I started. I took a deep breath, preparing myself. “When I saw you in the classroom, I quiet literally started to freak out,” I chuckled and Edward snickered. It was easier to talk about it then I would have expected. “I was able to compose myself, before I made a scene.” I took another deep breath, starting to get emotional. Edward placed his hand on my shoulder again, and I clasped my hand over his, grateful for his support. “I introduced myself as Anna, because that’s what I was going by. I planned on just running away and never looking back, but something kept me there. And then as the days went by I remembered why I fell in love with you.” My voice almost turned into a whisper and I wasn’t sure if he was able to hear it. “I would have told you earlier, but I tried my hardest to keep Bella Swan compressed, behind the wall I spent years trying to build. I wasn’t ready to face her pain. Not after so many years of numbness.” I stared at the ground, my mind buzzing. Edward kept silent, too. There wasn’t another creature around us and for that I was thankful.

“Bella,” Edward said slowly. I looked up at him, not knowing what to expect. But all I saw there was love. “I’m so sorry that I put you through that,” he whispered, both of his eyes boring into mine. I smiled up at him, loving him more every moment. We just sat there, staring into each other’s eyes. It was a perfect moment, utter bliss… that was until something started to ring very loudly. Edward and I both jumped up about two feet, our dead hearts racing. Edward quickly fumbled with something in his pocket and brought out a cell phone. He checked the caller ID and rolled his eyes. “It’s Alice,” he grumbled.

“She saw everything,” I announced in a monotone. It was such a perfect moment.

“Hopefully she won’t see this,” he muttered as he raised the cell phone high and threw it a far away as he could. We both watched as it went sailing over the trees.

Edward then leaned in so that our faces were only centimeters apart. Our lips sealed together without another moment wasted. It felt as though I would burst with happiness. It was the first time in ten years that I felt like I was truly myself. Probably because Edward and I go together like the night and the moon. We were made for each other. I always wondered why I hadn’t figured that out sooner.


“So, Bella,” Emmett started, folding his hands neatly on his lap. Edward and I sat in the living room, surrounded by his family- our family. “Can you explain to me how on Earth you are sitting here on that couch when you were said to have died ten years ago?” he raised and eyebrow and I looked at Edward hopefully. The Cullens had a pretty big shock when I walked through the door, it turned out that Alice didn’t fill them in on the happenings of the day. She said that she lived for surprises. It was probably also payback for not answering her call. “So…?” Emmett prodded. Edward and I exchanged a quick glance.

“It’s kind of a long story,” Edward muttered, both of us wishing for the subject to drop. It only happened an hour or two before we entered the house. We still had to get used to it ourselves.

“Don’t worry,” Emmett stated, stretching his arms over the back of the couch. “We all have plenty of time.”