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Jacob comes to a realization as he watches the Cullens.

I don't know, it's just something that I thought of. Hope you like it :)

1. Chapter 1

Rating 4.5/5   Word Count 1009   Review this Chapter


It sucks. It is a living Hell. Standing outside the horribly sweet smelling bloodsucker's house, that was my life summary as of the past three weeks and two days. Three weeks and two days without a smile on my lips, or a sparkle in my eyes. Three weeks and two days without her.

I stared through their living-room window, smiling grimly. Living room my ass. That was what it looked like they were doing though, sitting together, laughing and talking- it was like one of those Hallmark cards, where everyone is so cheerily fake.

I shifted my weight, and a twig snapped under my right foot. I froze, not even breathing, but no one noticed. What was going on? Why hadn't the black haired leech seen me? Shouldn't the tall, brooding weirdo be able to sense my wildly churning emotions? Or even the devil himself, Mr. Perfect, hear my thoughts? All this hype about them being super-sensitive and they didn't even know I was standing thirty feet from their window, watching them.

Hatred burned inside me as I saw him lightning fast switch her from sitting next to him to sitting on his lap. She didn't even have time to blink. I involuntarily stepped forward, way too eager snap his pretty little neck. I didn't need to worry though, I realized dejectedly, as she finally realized what had happened and yelped, surprised, and finally calmed down enough to lean back against him, giggling happily. I wanted to tear that slightly self-satisfied, adoring smile right off his face. That was my look for her. I decided not to think on that. It hurt too much.

It was so hard to not crash through their window and create a fight right there, on their perfectly groomed hardwood floors. A vision of my own battered wood floors, sandy and worn down, popped into my mind. I growled quietly. He had to have everything going for him didn't he? I mean it was bad enough that he had a face and a bod any guy would kill for, but on top of that, he had to have cars, money, a ridiculously large house, girls drooling after him left and right, a dad that wasn't in a wheelchair, and a mom that wasn't dead (technically speaking, of course).

A fury grew inside me as his family laughed at something he had said. I hated them, all of them. Part of my mind said that that wasn't fair, especially against Dr. Carlisle Cullen (the rational part of my mind sneered the name). And I guess the mom didn't seem all that bad. But she did support that bloodsucker in everything he did. Hell, she even supported him when he left her. Not that I wouldn't mind spending my life piecing her together again if he left again. I wouldn't mind one bit. I would even help him pack his bags.

It only took me half a second to realize that wasn't true. I absolutely hated myself for admitting it, but no matter how much of a monster he was, she loved him. And I loved her too much to make her unhappy again. A snarl ripped through my chest as I remembered the state he had left her in. Suddenly I saw myself as everyone else now did; a thin line for a mouth, sunken cheeks from my loss of appetite, and lifeless eyes with purplish bruises underneath from lack of sleep. I realized I looked like her when he left. How was it that she had this affect on me? It was like she was air to me. I needed her. If someone were to check my life necessities it would be Bella, food, water, and oxygen. I winced as I thought her name, and made a mental note to not do it again anytime soon. Now that I thought about it, it made sense that Dad was always calling Charlie. I was so out of it I didn't even realize my dad had been talking about me right in front of my face.

Fury was overtaking me as I thought about how easy it was for one guy to ruin my entire life. I sighed, frustrated. That was kind of my trademark thing now- sighing. No one ever said anything out loud, but it was hard to ignore how the pack was beginning to get seriously worried about how often I exhaled. Was I honestly that far gone?

I finally turned to leave; it was too risky being here anyways; any minute the wind could change its direction, blowing my scent towards them. I had already started walking when I heard a heartbreakingly beautiful melody. I inwardly smacked myself for thinking it was beautiful when I realized it was Edward that was making the sound. I had often caught her humming the song to herself, but I could tell she didn't do it consciously. It was obvious now that the song had been made for her.

I crept farther east, trying to get a better vantage point of the piano bench. I needed to see them there, sitting together. I needed something to spur me on. Sleepless nights no longer kept me going through the day.

When I finally saw the piano, my body ripped apart and I exploded outwards. My head was livid, just as I had planned, but my heart caved in upon itself. I crashed through the forest, my muscles straining as I ran faster, faster, away from it all. It was ridiculous to believe I could run from my problems, but I tried harder than I had ever tried in my life. It never worked. Because three hours later, by the time I hit Canada, visions of her bottomless brown eyes dancing with excitement, right before he leaned down to kiss her still played in my mind. And it was then that it finally struck me, maybe the devil had been right. Maybe she would always go back to him. Maybe no matter how hard I fought, I could never get her back.