Imprints in the Snow
For what you did to me
And what I'll do to you
What everyone else gets
You get a lifetime
--- My Chemical Romance There's nothing Bella hates more than life, and Edward Cullen. She resents him for creating her, against his better judgement. After being unable to accept life as an immortal, she returns to Forks, Washington, hoping to find peace in the place that she spent the last of her years as a human. But just as Bella's adjusted, a very unexpected someone enters her life again and tears everything up. Chapter Six!
5. Chapter 5 - (Jacob)
Rating 5/5 Word Count 1105 Review this Chapter
Earlier that day - continued from Chapter 4
Two can keep a secret
If one of them is dead
--- The Pierces
I couldn't sleep. Billy's snoring came clear and distinct from outside the closed bedroom door, and I pressed the palms of my hands closer to my ears and tried to tune out the snoring, but I knew it was more than that that was keeping me awake.
My mind was moving in useless circles, trying to find a different reason for the way I was feeling other than the one that would portentially cause Sam to kill me with his bare hands. I was afraid to phase, fearful that my uncontrolled thoughts would betray me to the Alpha. Some part of me was frustrated about this - it was like I couldn't be my true self in the condition I was in.
The vision of her face, welcome in my near hysteric state, flashed before my very eyes. Her icy, pale skin, white like alabaster, had a silky feeling to it. I wanted to grab two handfuls of her brown hair, cascading down from the top of her head down to her small waist . As revolting the idea was - to touch my mortal enemy - I was intrigued by the idea. She was still Bella. Just a little colder, and a lot more durable, but still the girl I had fallen in love with. I wanted to kiss her rock hard lips, and warm her with my too-hot skin.
My shoulders shaking with the sudden chills running down my back, I rolled onto my back, staring up at the ceiling. "I can't sleep!" I whispered to no one in the dark. I fumbled around in my tiny room for my clothes, deciding on the spot to go outside.
I couldn't phase. I couldn't be myself. I couldn't be free.
I. Would. See. Her.
Making sure that the door was closed firmly behind me, I slid into the driver's seat of my Rabbit and started it up, not for once worrying about waking up Billy. I backed out of the garage, and I was on my way in a matter of moments. As I passed by the Clearwater's house, I could see Leah's dark eyes behind the darkened curtain. She was staring at me, as if encouraging me to accelerate.
The needle raced up the dial.
* * *
"Bella," I whispered, staring up at her bedroom window, longing to see her white face. I knew she could hear me from inside. "Bella Swan." I said again.
Her face appeared at the curtain, and she pulled it halfway open to stare at me. "What are you doing here, Jacob Black?" There was ice in her voice and a part of me died inside. "It's two o'clock in the morning!" The warmth crept into her voice. The circles under her eyes made it seem like she was suffering from lack of sleep.
"D'you want to do back in and get some sleep?" I said, smiling the smile I knew she liked best.
A smile of her own crept across her ace. "Charlie will still be asleep for another few hours. Would you like to come for a walk with me?" She smiled, deviant.
How irresistable she was! I waited patiently as she jumped down from her window, landing noiselessly in the grass.
There was no human awake in the town of Forks at this time in the night. She walked silently up the path next to her house, stopping when we could still see the house. She spun around, glaring down at me. A wave of deja-vu spread through me. There was something strangely familiar about this situation. I couldn't quite put my finger on it.
She looked so beautiful in the moonlit woods. The light bouncing off from the slick, dew-wet leaves illuminated her high cheekbones, and flashing eyes. "We shouldn't be doing this." She whispered, as if the words were choking her on the way out.
"Doing what?" I asked, holding my arms by my sides, afraid to reach out and touch her. It took all of the patience I had been building to keep my arms locked by my side.
"Making contact! If Sam saw you like this - with me, what do you think he would do?" She looked at me helplessly.
"Nothing. He'd do nothing. I wouldn't let him lay a finger on you." She clenched her teeth together.
"It's not me that I'm worried about, Jacob Black." The hardness of her eyes and her voice had returned. I reached out to her, and she took an automatic step back. "Are you willing to risk everything good in your life for someone who cannot love you back?"
I knew what she meant immediately. "I don't believe that, Bells. You know I don't." I said firmly.
"Stop that!" She snapped suddenly. "Don't fight for me, Jacob Black! I'm a monster! I have no soul - don't sacrifice your soul for me! I'm not worth it!" If she could cry, tears would've fallen from her eyes long ago. I relaxed my muscles and stepped forwards, enveloping the rigid Bella in my arms. After a moment, I felt her cold arms slink around me.
"I said I would keep fighting, didn't I, Bells? I'm fighting for you. You're all I want. All I ever wanted." I muttered into her hair, inhaling her sweet scent. It caused me no pain now.
"Until my heart stops beating." She whispered; and I didn't know if she meant for me to hear her or not. "That's already happened. And I don't know how to take it from here." She suddenly grew rigid again, pushing away from me with impressive force. I took a step back and she regained composure. "Go." If vampires could cry, droplets would've been gushing down her cold cheeks now. "You don't want the catch that comes with loving a vampire."
"I do, I do!" I stepped forwards, crushing her to my chest despite her protests. "I want it all, Bella. I'm selfish enough to want you all for myself, no matter the consequences."
"You're a fool," she muttered into my arm, cold, fragrant wisps of breath caressing my skin.
"A fool in love."
"I'm being serious, Jacob. What if Sam caught you? You may not be so lucky dealing with him."
"I want to be with you, Bella!"
She broke away from me, her eyes downcast. "I'm not healthy for you." I blinked.
And she was gone.