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This is about the pain that both Edward and Bella go through while away from each other, both believing that the other couldn't love them any more. however, it does come to a clichéd happy ending.

~* none of the characters or anything like that belong to me. They belong to Stephenie Meyer*~

5. Realization

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"Don't you want me anymore?"



I really had much too much time to myself on the plane to Florence. My memory me battered me with the word. No, no, no, no. It's monosybilitie beat a terrible rythym of pain. A nasty voice in my head said, That's how she remembered you. Before she died, at least. I sat , waiting for the landing. I would run to Volterra.There was no time to steal a car. I would be there sooner, anyway. Strange, how I would welcome death, despite the fact that I knew she wouldn't be there. That if there was an afterlife at all, I would be in hell, and Bella in heaven. I relished the relief I felt, thinking her name.

"I'm coming, Bella," I mutter to myself.


Bella's POV

"I guess this means our friendship is oficialy...over"

<>Over. Friendship. Now I had no tiny, imperceptable link to the Cullens, through Alice. She had severed the connection, small though it was, and all because my best friend was a werewolf. I was miserable, determined to hate her, but knowing that I should be hating myself. Trust me to be friends with the closest mythical creature in a ten mile radius. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I had no sense of self preservation. In fact, death seemed a charitable option. At least Edward ,*wince*, wouldn't kill himself. He didn't love me. That was all. So I could die. I walked down to the kitchen, searching for a knife. I took a chefs knife, the one I used to cut raw meat. In a dreamlike trance, I floated up the stairs, not even surprised that I didn't trip once. I closed the door to my room, and slit my wrist. The deep, pounding pain that was bringing me closer to death every second allowed me to acsess memories that were otherwise painful.

<> I love you, I love you. Edward, I love you, even though you tore me apart, even though you don't love me, I love you. Good-bye. I lay down and prepared myself for oblivion.


Edwards POV

"Edward! She's going to kill herself!" Alice screamed at me through the cell phone.

"How can she. Bella's already dead, isn't she?" I spoke numbly, like my brian had frozen. I heard Alice cursing fluently on the other end.

"NO! SHE BLOODY WELL ISN'T!" She finally exploded. More calmly, she said,"Bella is going to kill herself because she thinks there isn't anything left to live for. She'll be dead in a day if you don't come back."

"Alice! I'm in goddamnit Italy! How am I supposed to get to Forks in twenty four hours? Hmm? Ever thought of that?" I heard a small gasp on the other end of the line. Damn. Nobady was supposed to know I was going to kill myself.

"Fine. Carlisle and I are leaving for Forks. We should be there in a few hours. I can see that you don't care whether she lives or dies. Your loss." She hung up.

So Bella wasn't dead, Alice was probably going to change her, and I had wasted three hundred dollars on a plane ticket to Florence. God, I was stupid.