take care of your new human, dear
Written for twilight_t00bs on LiveJournal.
1. take care of your new human, dear
Rating 5/5 Word Count 1282 Review this Chapter
She thinks it started with the prom, Bella in front of her vanity. Eyes closed, hair wound in tight curls around her face. Soft pink gloss accentuating full lips, brown eyeshadow matching her features perfectly. It had been a hectic day -- rushing to get everything perfect, to make beautiful Bella look amazing.
But it didn't start then, did it?
Before. When she'd first realized what a selfless person Bella was. When they went on simple shopping trips. When she'd risked her life to save Bella from James.
Her love for Bella didn't start with one thing; when does eternity start?
She's a vampire, and she can't sleep. She'll never be able to fall into unconsciousness and escape these thoughts that are swirling around her head, chasing each other in endless circles.
Bella -- those beautiful brown eyes and full red lips. Always laughing, always seeing the best in people. Giving more of her heart to other people than she keeps for herself.
During one of these sleepless nights is when Alice starts wondering what it would be like to kiss Bella. She doesn't wonder what it would be like to love Bella, because, since the beginning, Alice has always loved her.
It's late, and it's time to hurry and get to school. Alice is sitting in Edward's car, waiting for Bella to emerge from her house. Edward's off on some trip -- hunting? She can't even remember anymore -- and so she and Bella have the car to themselves.
As much as she doesn't want to be late, Alice can't help but slow down her "breakneck" pace and savor the moments she's spending with Bella. She reaches over and wraps an arm around Bella's shoulders. They're only going about sixty miles an hour, but Alice decides she'd rather be late than miss this.
It's like starting a whole new life. Like living again.
Before Bella, her life was boring. Immortality gets old when you only ever interact with people you've spent your whole life with. You don't meet anyone new. Your love life doesn't change. After a while, you get tired of staring into his eyes and telling him how much you love him.
But when Bella comes, everything about her life is turned completely upside down. There's the challenge of her warm human blood as well as the thrill of getting to know someone new.
Her life has never been more exciting.
She's spontaneous by nature -- at least, that's what she's always thought about herself. But if she's being honest, she relies on her visions far more than a healthy person should. Her life is premeditated, because she knows what's going to happen and when almost all of the time. From the beginning of her existence she's always expected what's coming: her mate, her diet, her coven. Her entire life.
But the amazing thing, she thinks, twirling her finger through Bella's hair, is that she'd never suspected this could happen. And at Bella's smile, she realizes that's the way things should be.
"Let's go to Port Angeles," Alice says abruptly. It isn't planned at all. For some reason, she just feels the inexplicable need to be around Bella, alone.
Bella furrows her eyebrows, surprised, but follows obediently enough.
Alice doesn't want to go shopping. Instead, she takes the two of them to a restaurant that Bella hasn't visited before. She watches the girl eat, and then she smiles slightly to herself.
Bella looks up, cheeks heating self-consciously. "What?"
"Do you love me?"
She reaches across to hold Alice's hand. "Of course I do," Bella says.
Alice smiles. "I love you too."
She hates museums, but for some reason, Bella loves them. So Alice volunteers to take her, since of course Alice would do almost anything for her Bella. The prehistoric fossilized beasts only interest Alice in the fact that she's considering what they might taste like. But Bella's intently reading each plaque, and the way her eyes study the writing, her hair falling halfway over her face, is so beautiful.
She sneaks up behind Bella -- who doesn't stand a chance of detecting her -- and whispers in her ear, "Having fun?"
Bella whirls around, grinning. "I could think of something more fun."
They'd all thought it was odd, something a stalker would do. Not a caring, compassionate being.
But Alice knows, now, the reason why Edward loves to watch Bella sleep.
Her chest moves slowly as she breathes deeply. She's so perfectly peaceful -- so fragile and human. It makes Alice want to protect her with her entire being. It's her responsibility to keep Bella safe.
When Alice doesn't come home till dawn, the family is gathered waiting for her.
Edward and Jasper stand up. Edward asks, "Where were you?"
And when she says, "Watching Bella sleep," Jasper knows their relationship is over.
Alice is worried about Bella. She doesn't want her love to have to deal with Edward at the moment, not after she's just awakened from a long night of tossing and turning, of strange dreams and sleep-talking.
But this is necessary. Alice knows it.
She's worried that Edward will talk to her and Bella will go back to him and then she won't have her love anymore.
Bella's expression is unreadable as she walks out of the house, motioning Alice to come inside.
It's Alice's turn to talk to Edward, and she hopes it doesn't hurt him too much.
Like a professional appointment, Alice walks into Edward's bedroom. She checks her watch: 10:00 AM.
He's laying on his bed, his eyes looking straight up toward the ceiling, and his body is still. He might not be showing it, but his pain crashes into her full-force. She's suddenly glad she doesn't have Jasper's gift.
"Is she happy around you?" he asks, voice calm. It doesn't betray any emotion: no hint of fear, anger, sadness, worry.
"Yes," Alice says in the same even tone.
"Then I hope you two are happy together," he whispers, and this time, his voice breaks.
It's been a month, now, since they started their strange relationship. Their one-month anniversary.
Most people in their family have been accepting, she can say. But Alice knows it's different than that. It's almost as if nobody knows what to think of them, so they try and stay out of it. Jasper's reaction hasn't been what she expected. She'd thought he'd rage and scream (even though he's never like that), so maybe he would be quietly disappointed. But he isn't that, either.
He just stays on the fringes of her life, silently watching as they silently grow farther apart.
"Edward," Alice says gently, "you don't have to leave."
He's still on his bed.
"I know, Alice," he says, voice still unnaturally monotonous.
"I don't want to lose you. I'm not the only one. If anything, I can speak for Esme."
"Why don't you get your human some lunch?" he says a little too loudly, and it's the first time he's allowed himself to express any emotion. Bitterness coats his tone. "You know she needs to eat, right?"
Alice doesn't say anything. She turns around slowly and opens the door to the hallway, shutting it behind her.