This takes place after New Moon. Edward attempts to surprise Bella with something big. But there plans are interrupted with others that have plans of there own for Bella, and the people she loves. Final Chapter Added!
21. Chapter 21: Begin Again
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We were running at an exhilarating speed through the dark forest. It was the most amazing feeling, and so much better than being on Edwards back while he ran. Now I understood why he loved it so much, why he loved speed. It was so natural, really second nature, as Edward had said so many times.
The voices and emotions that were once so over baring were now just a memory. Right now none of the other things even mattered. The only thoughts were my own and Edwards. I could handle this. He erased all my anxiety.
Edward abruptly stopped to sit on a fallen tree. He waved me over to come sit with him. I giggled at his playful smile. He was absurdly happy, and that made my entire being feel like I was floating. I threw myself into his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck, and stared into his dark eyes.
I had so many question I wanted to ask him, but hated to ruin this very peaceful moment with more stress. His mind was filled with loving thoughts of my beauty and our future. I wondered if he had always felt so pleased when we were together.
He pushed a stray hair behind my ears. Then he moved towards my neck, placing his lips below my ear. It tickled and I lightly giggled. He kissed me all the way down my neck, then back up to my lips. He kissed with me such force, I almost forgot that I was no longer breakable. He would be able to kiss me with everything he had without worry that I would get hurt.
I ran my hands through his silky hair, then pulled him closer. He ran his fingers along my body, caressing every part of my skin, making me shiver. Desire pulsed through my empty veins, pushing me to take more over him. I greedily enveloped my lips in his kiss. Our lips parted, and our mouths became one. Our bodies pressed tightly against each other, making there no room for even air to pass through.
I pushed away from him, ending our lustful kiss. His eyes widened. I was never the one to pull away from him, I was usually the one pushing both our limits.
“What’s wrong?” He thought he did something wrong, when really he was doing everything right.
“It’s not you Edward. I want you, I do, but…”
I really wanted to give all of myself to him. To give him my unbreakable body, but just not here. The passion that burned between us was stronger than the one that burned in my stomach for blood. I had to stop before we went to far. I wasn’t ready for that…yet.
“It’s ok. I understand.” he said pulling slightly away from my body, making a slight gap between us.
“In time, just not now.” I said. He understood completely.
“That’s fine. I’ll wait for you forever. I’ve gone this far without your body, I’m sure I can last a little while longer.”
“Are you sure?” I said pulling him closer and placing my lips gently along his jaw.
He pulled away, and gave me a mischievous look. “Well if you insist.”
He pulled my face closer and planted thousands of kisses all over my face.
“Stop.” I said laughing.
“What I can’t quite hear you.”
“Stop. Edward.” Of course I really didn’t want him to stop, his kisses were better than…well…everything.
He pulled away, and I left his lap to sit next to him, so not to entice him anymore. I took his arm and rested my head on his shoulder.
I can’t believe I almost lost you. I said to myself. I was so glad he would never be able to read my thoughts. I didn’t want him to worry about the fact that I was still lingering over the thought of almost losing him.
“I missed you Edward.” I said quietly. “Now, I know that you were by my side throughout the entire transformation, but then I was alone. And I missed you. You were my only thought the entire time.”
He turned to look down at me. His eyes were sad, yet filled with such compassion.
“Bella,” he searched his mind for the right words, and although I could hear everything he thought I waited patiently for an answer to leave his lips.
The silence continued he still hadn’t found the right thing to say. I quickly changed the subject, I didn’t want him to feel pain over me missing him, it was just something I needed him to hear.
“What happened?” I asked softly. Things had finally died down, but here I was bringing up the things that pained us both. Nevertheless I needed to know. “I mean I saw what happened in your thoughts, but what really happened? What about Charlie? I mean I know he’s ok, but what does he think happened to me? Or what happened to him?”
I had so many question, this was only part of what I wanted to know. Without any of the other voices to complicate things, I figured now was probably the best time to ask.
He sat quietly for a short time, contemplating how to put to words what he thought would upset me. “We took him to the hospital after the car crash. Carlisle has been taking care of him the entire time. He told Charlie that he passed out and that he found him unconscious, then took him to the hospital. Charlie went home shortly after. They really didn‘t have to keep him, he was fine. They told him it was probably just from exhaustion.” Edward was watching me cautiously, ensuring his words didn’t hurt me. “He thinks that you were driving and died in a car crash. We made it look like you were driving to our house when someone hit you.”
“What about a body or something?”
“We had to ‘convince’ the coroners that your body was so severely burned that Charlie shouldn’t see you.”
“So Charlie’s ok. He wasn’t hurt.” I stated matter of fact.
“Yes. He’s fine, surprisingly nothing happened. The trunk was probably the safest place to be.”
“Wait, the car crash. That car. I don’t understand. A car did hit me.”
Suddenly he was filled with that same remorse that he had felt at home. Again he let his head fill with images of what he did. He has showed me all this before, but it was only making sense.
He was the car that smashed into us. He recalled Alice’s vision, and how he instantly rejected the idea. But in the end realized it was the only way. He was hating himself for being the reason he had to bite me in the first place. Now I understood why he was feeling such an indescribable amount of remorse and guilt.
His guilt was only intensified because of the fact that I could see it and feel every ounce of it. It made me feel bad for even existing, for being the reason he felt all this.
“Edward please stop.” I begged of him.
“I’m sorry.” He wasn’t apologizing for his feeling, but apologizing for what he did, for crashing into the car. He was apologizing for existing in my life.
“Don’t be sorry. You did what you thought was right. You were going to have to change me sooner or later, and I like this sooner stuff.” I wanted him to know I wasn’t the least bit angry with him. I could never be.
“But Charlie. He’s lost you in such an abrupt way, and that’s my fault.”
“He was going to lose me anyway. Either way he was going to be hurt. I knew that when I asked you to change me. I hate that he thinks I’m dead, but it’s the way it has to be.”
“No. It didn’t have to be that way.”
“Edward would you please stop with the guilt, I can’t take it. It’s too much for me to handle.” I was getting frustrated by the fact that I was feeling things that were not my own.
“I’m sorry.” I now officially hated the word sorry.
“Please don’t be sorry. You did the right thing. And I’m eternally grateful. Please just go back to being happy.”
He attempted that emotion, but failed miserably. How could he be so sad, when I’m here now with him because of what he did? It was very contradicting of him. To be so happy that I was able to kiss him with everything I had, and then hate that he made me what I was because he bit me.
I decided the only way for him to forget, was to change the subject. “Edward you know my powers? How can I have the same exact powers that all three of you have?” I still didn’t understand that. It couldn’t just be a coincidence.
“I’m not sure myself. We should ask Carlisle when he gets home from work.” he said solemnly.
He was still filled with guilt. Damn it Edward. How could I explain to you that you’re right, and that you shouldn’t feel any remorse. I mean he always considers himself right. Why couldn’t he just see that he was also right when it came to this.
I thought about Jasper and how he was able to manipulate everyone’s emotions. I should be able to do that. If I can feel what everyone’s feeling then I should be able to control them too…right?
I focused on his emotions. Completely letting it take over me. Letting it swallow even my own emotions. Then I twisted it so he felt happiness, righteousness. I turned his guilt into the exact opposite, letting it fill him with all the things that he should be feeling.
He turned to me and instantly realized what I had done. I was afraid that he would be mad at me, for doing it to him, but he really gave me no other choice.
Surprisingly he smile and kissed my forehead.
“Thank you.” he said simply.
I stopped pulling at his emotions and let them take hold of themselves. He was no longer sad. It worked.
“When will Carlisle be home?” I wanted to get to the bottom of this whole power thing.
“I think he’ll be done sometime in the morning. He took the late shift, because it was sunny earlier. So soon.”
“But before we go home to talk to him about you amazing abilities. You must drink first.”
I had hoped to delay that for as long as possible. The image of blood in my mouth almost made me gag. Was that normal for a vampire to feel that why towards there source of life? My stomach heaved forward, making the longing for some sort of relief for the fire. I needed to eat, no matter what my mind wanted.
Edward sensed my apprehension and grabbed my hand. “Come on.” he said pulling me through the forest.
We stopped behind some bushes and knelt down. The smell of blood came crashing down on me like a huge boulder. I instantly wanted it. I wanted to leap out of these bushes and taste it.
Edward’s had pushed down on my shoulder, sensing my sudden longing for the animals blood. It was just a innocent sleeping deer. Could I do this to something so harmless?
“Go on.” His lips moved so fast and so quiet I was surprised I was able to hear him. But I heard him so clear, it was as if he spoke normally.
I knelt there for a while, considering what exactly I was about to. I tried to resist, but my stomach wouldn’t let me. Each breathe I took brought the sweet smell of blood rushing through my mind. There was no avoiding it.
I silently stepped through the bushes. I looked back at Edward and he just looked back at me encouragingly. I stepped forward, not making a sound. With each step I took the smell got stronger and stronger, completely taking over all of my senses.
Without thinking about it anymore my instincts took over and pushed my body to attack the deer. I flew through the air, and before I knew it was biting into the deer soft pelt. The blood instantly caressed my parched throat quickly sending waves of cool blood to put out the fire. I gulped for more, not wanting any of it go wasted. I drank until the deer was dry and my stomach was satisfied.
I sat up from the deer, and ran towards Edward. I didn’t want to see what I had done to it. I didn’t need to see what it would look like without blood. The monster inside me was fulfilled, but I wouldn’t give in entirely.
“That wasn’t so bad, right?”
I wiped the blood that was left around my mouth. It really wasn’t bad at all. Blood never smelt so sweet.
“No, it wasn’t.”
Edward’s finger wiped away a droplet of fresh blood that was left on my chin, then licked it off his finger. He smiled at me.
“Let’s go back home. I’m sure Carlisle will be home soon, then you can ask him a million and one questions.”
I laughed at that. I was so glad he was happy again. He took my hand and then were flying through the forest, running home.
- Chapter 1: Forever
- Chapter 2: Surprises
- Chapter 3: Unenthusiastic
- Chapter 4: Unexpected
- Chapter 6: Confusion
- Chapter 5: Anxiety
- Chapter 7: Romance
- Chapter 8: Revenge
- Chapter 9: Angelo
- Chapter 10: Topaz
- Chapter 11: Giving Up
- Chapter 12: Darkness
- Chapter 13: Lost Love
- Chapter 14: Forever or Never
- Chapter 15: Fading Heart
- Chapter 16: Pay Back
- Chapter 17: Guilt
- Chapter 18: Damning My Angel
- Chapter 19: Awaking
- Chapter 20: Over Powering
- Chapter 21: Begin Again
- Chapter 22: Understanding
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- 17 Feb 07
- 16 Jun 07