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With a Broken heart that's still beating

A song-fic about how Bella feels right after Edward leaves her in New Moon.

I do not own the characters and I do not own the song. The song is "Broken" by Lifehouse. This is my first attempt at a song-fic. Please tell me if you liked it or what I could do better, etc.

1. Chapter 1

Rating 4.5/5   Word Count 888   Review this Chapter

The Broken Clock is a comfort

It helps me sleep tonight

But it can’t stop the nightmares. The terrifying nightmares. Only your return could do that.

Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time

Time, love, life, it means nothing anymore. How can I live like this? Time drags on. Time with out my true love. Time without my heart fluttering at even your gentlest touch. Time is meaningless.

And I am here still waiting

I can’t leave. If I do it will be so much harder to convince myself you were more than just a wonderful dream.

Though I still have my doubts

Sometimes I wonder deep, deep down inside of myself if you will ever return. If maybe you really do love me. If what you said when you left was a lie. Then I tell myself, “It never did make sense for you to love me. I being so plain, so clumsy, so boring, so very human. You deserve better.”

I am damaged at best

Like you’ve already figured out

It’s true, I’m damaged beyond repair. You’ve torn my heart to pieces and there’s no hope of saving it now. There’s something seriously wrong with me.

I’m falling apart

Clutching at my sides, trying to keep myself together.

I’m barely breathing

Gasping for air as the memories hit. The memories of you. They knock the breath out of me.

With a broken heart

That’s still beating

My heart is scarred and torn yet somehow I’m not dead. Somehow it’s still beating. Every thump in my chest reminds me of what I lost. Reminds me of you.

In the pain is there healing

Perhaps the pain is the same but I’m growing stronger or maybe just growing numb. It will never completely heal though. I’m scarred for life.

In your name I find meaning

The sound of your name grabs my attention. It feels so amazing on my lips. Edward. Edward Cullen. Edward, Edward, Edward. So beautiful and yet oh so very painful.

So I’m holding on (I’m holding on) (I’m holding on)

I’m barely holding on to you.

I must not forget. I must never forget you. I try not to think of you but I do try to remember.

The broken locks were a warning

You got inside my head

I try my best to be guarded

I’m an open book instead

I confided in you. I told you my thought. I trusted you with all of my heart. Now you’re gone.

And I still see your reflection

Inside of my eyes

I can see you now. Your flawless pale skin, your deep topaz eyes, your beautiful bronze hair. Everything. So perfect.

That are looking for purpose

They’re still looking for life

I’m still searching for something with purpose. My life is a night without stars. Not even a moon is visible. Darkness. Nothing but meaningless darkness.

I’m falling apart

I’m barely breathing

Overcome by the grief that haunts me. I feel like I’m falling to pieces.

With a broken heart that’s still beating

Pain in every beat of the mangled thing in my chest.

In the pain (In the pain) is there healing

In your name I find meaning

You meant, still do mean the world to me.

So I’m holding on (I’m still holdin on)(I’m holding on)(I’m still holdin on)(I’m holdin on)

I’m barely holding on to you

Your cool lips on mine. Your comforting embrace. I’ll always remember. I’ll never forget.

I’m hanging on another day

Just to see what, you will throw my way

I must survive as impossible as it seems. I must live through this pain.

And I’m hanging on to the words you say

You said that I will, will be okay

I doubt that you knew this would happen to me when you left. You said it would be as if you never did exist. Impossible.

The broken light on the freeway

Left me here alone

I am alone. Alone and broken without you. You left me. Left me with a broken heart, a broken soul.

I may have lost my way now

But I haven’t forgotten my way home

I know where my home should be, where I should be. I should be with you and your family that was becoming like mine. Was.The past tense adds to the pain.

I’m falling apart

I’m barely breathing

Screams tear past my lips. Sweat covers my body. Another night, another nightmare. I gasp for breath.

With a broken heart

That’s still breathing

My heart thumps wildly against my chest. It’s as if it wishes to escape. Escape the pain. But that isn’t going to happen.

In the pain (in the pain) there is healingIn your name (In your name) I find meaning

So I’m holding on(I’m still holdin)(I’m holdin on)

(I’m still holdin)(I’m holding on)(I’m still holdin)

Fight to survive. Fight to numb the pain. Don’t let go. Keep holding on.

Barely holding on to you (I’m still holding on)

My love for you still burns in my mutated heart. Now I’ll never love again. Never love anyone but you.

Barely holdin on to you

Once upon a time we existed together and I found love. Love more powerful then I had ever felt. Now it is no more. My story didn’t have a happy ending. I’m broken.