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Nightmare Angel

Summary:
Edward looks through Bella's window. He has been gone for six months, two weeks, a day, and five hours. He knows every minute because it hurts so much. All he wanted to do was see her one more time. What happens when he learns what he has done to the only one he will ever love? Image Hosted by ImageShack.us banner that actually shows up made by the FANtastic iris!


Notes:
This will switch between Edward's thoughts and Bella's. Disclaimer: I own nothing.


14. Egotist

Rating 0/5   Word Count 740   Review this Chapter

“She can hear us,” Alice said quite clearly. Her melodic voice shattered the fading pain.

“Alice!” I stood. “Oh! I’ve missed you so much!” I ran to her, and felt her arms, no longer cold, close around me.

“I’m so sorry, Bella.”

“What do you have to be sorry for?”

“For not talking my idiot brother out of, first, leaving you, and second, biting you. I mean, he could have waited a week, right? I know he loves you and everything but after all the trouble he’s given everyone to keep you human, he goes and does this. Oh well, at least…”

“He doesn’t love me, Alice.”

“Yes, I do!”

It was his perfect voice. I hadn’t even noticed the presence of my false angel, or the other three vampires.

“Darling Bella, I’ve missed you so,” Esme said, embracing me.

Carlisle smiled.

Emmett pounded me enthusiastically on the back, and I was surprised that even his considerable might caused no pain.

Edward simply gazed at me.

“I’m so glad to see you again. I’ve missed you all.”

But not as much as I missed him. He is my life.

“Edward, that’s a really bad idea,” Alice warns cryptically.

“What?” I say, and Edward looks away.

“He was going to try to explain what he did. I saw what your reaction would be.”

“Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Emmett, would you excuse me? I need a moment with Bella,” he interrupted, and the four members of my found family melted away.

He turned to face me. Childishly, I turned away.

“I will not ask you to forgive me. I will not ask you to tolerate my presence. I will not ask you if you even can. I will tell you one thing, if I may.”

I remained silent as my heart shattered. All his pretty words disguised one thing. I loved him, and he didn’t love me.

“Bella, I love you. I changed you because I’m in love with you. I couldn’t bear the thought of killing you, of living without you. I won’t ask you to understand. I suppose I’ll just go live by myself. But I had to have you live, Bella. I needed you to live.”

I need him to live. In order to live, I need him.

“That’s all. I’m so sorry. Good-bye.”

I felt a rage boil in my stomach. He was leaving. Leaving. Again. My nightmares replayed this moment, my suppressed daydreams causing chills with the agony. He was not going to do this to me again!

Without even thinking, I threw myself at him. If he had struggled or even just stepped aside, I think the love might have disappeared forever, or at least be so twisted by pain that I could never forgive.

Instead, he wrapped his arms, cool and strong, around me, allowing himself to fall, but pushing me with him. He takes the weight of our fall, yet holds me close.

I feel the rage turn to a great weary sorrow. I love him.

It is a burden, this love, so heavy that I do not think I can bear it. I need him to take some of the weight. I need him in so many ways.

I push against him and start to sob. He holds me against him, but I try to push away. He releases me instantly, and we both stand. I push him to the floor as hard as I can. Astoundingly, he falls. Oh, that’s right.

I’m a VAMPIRE now. My bad.

He sits on the floor and stares up at me through those long, long lashes. His reddened eyes stare into my heart.

“Do you want me to leave?” he asks.

“No. I want you to love me.”

“I guess we both have what we want, then.” He stands and smiles in disbelief.

“Don’t. Don’t. When you leave…”

His face falls enough that I can see he thought I was won over so easily. That’s rich. I’m not quite so helplessly hopelessly madly enamored of him…

Well, I am, but that’s besides the point.

Still, it seems like I have self-aggrandizement to add to the long list of “reasons why you shouldn’t love him anymore, you idiot.”

Egotist.