Edward looks through Bella's window. He has been gone for six months, two weeks, a day, and five hours. He knows every minute because it hurts so much. All he wanted to do was see her one more time. What happens when he learns what he has done to the only one he will ever love? banner that actually shows up made by the FANtastic iris!
This will switch between Edward's thoughts and Bella's. Disclaimer: I own nothing.
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“Edward…” she moaned.
She was in pain. I tried to work faster, to not think above all else. Not think about how I’d wanted to hold her, how she could have moaned my name in pleasure, not in agony, how…
I instantly obeyed, but I did not allow hope.
I could not hope.
My beloved was little more than torso now, her limbs scattered in pieces on the floor, yet she was still the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
“Edward. Don’t kill me. At least, not right now. This is officially your last chance.”
“Really?” What an imbecilic thing to say. She’s just given you the one thing you desire most, oh numb-skulled one, and all you can see is “really?” What about embracing her, caressing her, thanking her and swearing you’ll never hurt her again.
“Yes. One more chance.”
I tenderly placed her appendages nearer her body, so they could reattach faster.
As she healed, I spoke.
“I’m sorry. Bella, Bella, I’m so sorry. For this, for everything. I only left because I’m not good for you. I left because I love you and I can’t bear to see you hurt, and I changed you because I can’t bear to live without you. I am so glad I did, though I should have waited. Because now I have you forever, angel. I can be by your side. Forever.
“I promise, I will never hurt you again. I will never torture you. I will never be the cause of your suffering. I love you. I always have loved you, and I always will love you. The life of a creature who should not exist is full of lies, Bella. I have told so many, but the most heinous- and least believable- of them all was telling you I didn’t want you. I want you. I will always want you. In every single way. Do you believe me?”
The word sent a quake through my stomach and soul.
“I suppose that’s your right. But I’m telling the truth.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
She smiled. “If you leave again, I will find a way to die. But I want you to stay. I want to live with you.”
“I will never leave you. Not until you order me away.”
“Like that will ever happen.”
Bella was almost entirely healed. She lifted her head and smiled at me.
I spoke softly. “Thank you. I don’t deserve this.”
“I know you don’t. But I love you. Just don’t hurt me anymore.”
She collapsed in my arms then, weary though she could not sleep, and trembled there for a second.
I deserve every name anyone could anyone call me. I am the cruelest thing ever born and yet I have been chosen to have the greatest gift ever- this girl.
I am a monster and a liar. I am a manipulator, preying on her love for me, a weakling too desperate to exist without her. I am a jailer, chaining my beloved to eternity, an animal, a beast who lives to feed. I am an imbecile, stupid enough to abandon her. I am an oath-breaker… I promised I’d stay as long as she needed me. I am the thief who stole her life and the sadist who watched her pain. I am the murderer who slew her, the egotist who believed he knew more of what was right than the one he loved, the thrall to her love, the fiend with the blood-red eyes.
I am all of these and more and yet she loves me.
Even though she knows what I am.
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