Letters of Hope
pretty banner made by Japanezegurl! Bella never remembered Jacob and was miserable until January. Then she wrote her first letter to Edward...
1. Chapter 1
Rating 4.5/5 Word Count 513 Review this Chapter
I pulled up me word processor and began typing. When I was done, I read over my letter.
I am lost. I have no friends and no future. I’m in the deepest pit of despair. I am a zombie. If I had golden eyes, I would look like one of you. My skin is pale and I have shadows under my eyes from nightmare-induced lack of sleep. Nothing can bring me even remotely close to ever being human again. The only thing that can make me slightly saner is you saying that you love me. If you ever read this letter, please reply. If I don’t live with Charlie, have him mail it to me. Please. It’s all that I ask of you.
I clicked print and waited for it to come out of the printer. When it was done printing, I put it in an envelope and taped it to my window. I stared at it for a moment, and then went to bed.
Two Weeks Later
Life (or death) continues. I talked to Angela today. She is wondering if I’ll ever come back to being myself again. I won’t, but she is trying to help. How is your life? Is it better without a human holding you back? Do you have a girlfriend? If you do, please don’t mention her.
I put that letter in an envelope also and taped it up right next to the previous one. I had the weirdest feeling that the next day was going to be different.
I woke up and stumbled over to my window. I noticed a third letter taped next to the two that I wrote. Ripping it open, I recognized the elegant calligraphy of his writing.
I love you. I always have, and I always will. I owe you an apology. I lied to you when we were leaving. I said I didn’t want you. That was the hardest thing that I have ever done. I thought you would move on if you thought that I had moved on. I was wrong. That lie was the blackest kind of blasphemy. As I watch you sleep, I can clearly see that I have hurt you beyond repair. At least you tried to act normal for Charlie, I didn’t do anything. Every hour was agonizing. I can not live without you, but I must. Every moment that you are near us is a chance that we will kill you by accident. I won’t let your life be in jeopardy because of my foolish desires.
I will be close by, but our paths will never cross. I will protect you, even though you won’t know it. Please don't try to find me.
Next to those letters, I taped up a piece of paper that read “okay” and inhaled deeply. At that, I saw small tree branches sway slightly in a light, unnatural breeze. I knew my angel was out there, and that small bit of knowledge gave me tremendous hope. He loved me. That bit of knowledge gave me light in my dark, lifeless world.