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Understanding

Summary:
Rosalie goes to La Push as a favor for Edward, but will she get what she came for? ...Or something more...?


Notes:
I originally wrote this for the non-cannon contest, but I couldn't stop writing! Hope you enjoy this as much as I do.


3. Chapter 3

Rating 4.5/5   Word Count 805   Review this Chapter

CHAPTER 3

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” –Carl Gustav Jung ~*~*~

I searched my mind for anything to say to explain myself. But I couldn’t find any words to describe my situation. I just stood there, looking out the window behind my family. The room stayed in that dead stillness for a few moments. Carlisle stood up.

“Rosalie,” he said quietly and gently. That’s just like Carlisle. Still calm and peaceful in the midst of absolute confusion. “Won’t you take a walk with me?” He walked out the back door without waiting for an answer. I quickly followed, my eyes on the ground.

We walked through the woods at human pace, Carlisle always ahead of me by a few paces. I racked my brain for something, anything, to say. Could I really tell Carlisle what I had done? I loved Carlisle, to be sure, but I doubted he could actually understand where I was coming from. Sure, he understood Edward’s fascination with Bella, but Bella’s main purpose in life wasn’t to kill vampires. And Edward had been alone for so long. I had Emmett. I should’ve been happy with what I had. Silently, I decided to not tell Carlisle anything other than what he asked. It would be easier to keeps things secret. I hoped.

Carlisle stopped, sat on a stump, and looked at me expectantly. I didn’t say anything. He raised his eyebrows, still waiting for me. Still I resisted. Finally, he sighed.

“Rosalie, where did you go today?”

“La Push.” My face stayed hard as stone. I nearly took a breath to say I didn’t exactly go to La Push, but I steadied myself. This was harder than I thought.

“Did you break their treaty? Did you go on their land?” I shook my head. Carlisle let out another sigh of exasperation. “Why did you go?” Good question. He seemed to know what I was doing and trying to find any way around it. Clever.

“For Edward,” was a suitable answer. But apparently not for him.

“Rose!” I looked back at him, tearing my eyes away from the skyline. He was standing now, obviously very distraught. I almost felt bad, but that feeling usually passes within a few moments. “Listen to me,” he said, “I need to know why you were at La Push and what you did. I need to know if you put us in any danger.” I caught my breath and forced down the words I felt coming to my lips. I had to stay silent. He stepped back. “If you won’t talk to me, what about Esme?” I shook my head. She wouldn’t be any help. She was a dear wonderful woman, but I knew she wouldn’t be able to help. “Alice?” Another no. She would side with Emmett for sure. “Emmett?” I nearly laughed that time. I’m so sure Emmett could be perfectly calm while I tell him about making out with a werewolf.

Carlisle looked up to the sky and then back at me. “What about… Bella?” His suggestion caught me by surprise. Bella? She wouldn’t be of any use to me. She was a pathetic stupid girl who actually wanted the damned life I had never wanted. All my problems today had started because of her, because…

Because she was in love with someone she shouldn’t be- against all odds. Somehow, that sounded strangely familiar. Bella was the only one who would understand. I knew that in that split moment when all was chaos in my mind. I gave a quick nod to Carlisle, before I changed my mind. He left in the direction of the house and I took his spot on the stump.

What was I getting myself into?

Soon enough, I heard Bella’s constant nervous breathing with the cracks and crackle of sticks and leaves. That just irritated me even more. How was she, the most clumsy and ordinary of humans, going to understand my problems? It was obvious that the two of us were nothing alike in appearance, personality, or temperament. I was about to get up and walk away, when she appeared through the opening in tress ahead.

She was terrified. I could smell the blood rushing to her cheeks, as always. Was she scared to be alone with me? Probably, I chuckled to myself. If I had my way she’d be dead in moments. But as she got closer, I noticed my disdain for her faded, and it was replaced with sheer confusion of who I had become. How did I end up so bitter, so angry at everyone- even the people I supposedly loved?

Unfortunately, like every other time I ask myself these questions, the memories came rushing back, even with Bella taking steps closer and closer to me...