Bella Swan is all alone. Her love and his family left her in the town of Forks with nothing. When a deadly disease starts to spread, and Bella catches it, what does she have to live for? Some old friends come in to town, and give her back her will to live. They give her a new life that no one can know about, or it could be their demise. As a well restrained newborn, Bella tries to move on with her life. Can she?
All charecters except Becka, Aaron, Alex and a few other people I made up all belong to Stephenie Meyer.
18. Chapter 18
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The next few days were boring. I guessed that Becka was still upset, and that Aaron and Alex were too, since she probably told them as well. I would have gone insane if it weren’t for Jacob.
Being with Jake was my human refuge. My coven was perfect for when I needed to talk without hiding anything, but Jake was my human safe hut. He seemed to understand me so well.
On Wednesday we were sitting in the garage after riding bikes for awhile. Jake said that I was getting really good, and that I must have natural talent or something.
“So Bella, do you want to ride again on Friday?” He asked.
I was about to say yes—who could say no to the hope in his face?—but then remembered the promise I had made with Mike at school that day.
“I’m sorry Jake. I promised some friends from school that I was going to go see a movie with them,” I said regretfully. His face fell. “You’ll come too, right?” I quickly asked. “I mean, you don’t have to hang out with a bunch of boring seniors.”
“You’d want me to hang out with you and your friends?”
“Yes,” I said with a shrug. “It’d be more fun with you there. You bring Quil, and it’ll be a party.”
He grinned. “Quil’s gonna freak. Senior girls,” he laughed. I noticed that he didn’t mention his friend Embry.
“What about Embry?” I asked. His face became slightly darker.
“Lately, he’s been hanging out with St. Sam,” he muttered. I looked at him in sympathy. I put my arm around his shoulder. I couldn’t get it all the way around, though.
“Oh, it’ll be okay Jake,” I murmured quietly. He nodded and looked out into the gently rain outside.
The next day at school, I went over to Mike. “Hey Mike, for tomorrow, do you think we could make into a group outing?”
He looked eager. “Yeah, that would be great. We could bring Eric and Katie, and maybe Ben and Angela, if she’s up to it.”
I sighed internally. He still wanted to go out with me. “Yeah, and maybe Jessica and Tyler and Conner, and maybe Lauren,” I added to his plan. His face foiled when I took away his double date plan.
“That sounds fun,” he said sullenly.
“Yeah, and some friends from La Push wanted to come too,” I said. His eyes narrowed.
“The friends you spend all your time with studying?”
“The very same ones,” I lied. “They wanted to meet you guys.”
Mike looked happy, despite the no dating part. During the duration of the day, he went up to all of our friends, and invited them all to come.
In the end, it seemed that we didn’t need to worry about more people.
Of course, Lauren and Jessica had bailed as soon as Mike said I was going. Eric and Katie both were busy. Tyler and Conner both were busy too, after Lauren got to them. Angela couldn’t come, since she had just started back up, and her parents didn’t want to strain her. Ben was staying with her.
So it was just Jacob, Mike and I. This was going to be fun. I wondered how badly I was going to be tortured.
“So, what movie are we going to see?” Mike asked as we waited outside my house for Jake to come.
“Oh, I was thinking Crosshairs,” I said casually. He looked at me in surprise.
“Oh, I thought you might have wanted to see Tomorrow and Forever,” he said. I shook my head.
“I’m not really in the mood for romance, I guess,” I said indifferently, my face becoming a blank mask.
Just then Jacob pulled up in his finished Rabbit. I gasped in surprise.
“You finished it! Oh my god!” I said, pride strong in my voice.
“Yeah, I finished it last night. This is its maiden voyage,” he said, beaming. I knew how happy he must be.
“You made this all by yourself?” Mike asked reluctantly, awe hidden in his voice. I knew how upset he must be, knowing that someone was better than him at something.
“Hey Mike, could Jake drive? This is his first time in his car,” I asked. He shrugged, and nodded. I climbed into the passenger seat, and Mike went into the back.
The ride to the movies was faintly awkward, but slightly funny. Watching humans get jealous was amusing. Their heart rates sped up constantly, and adrenaline would randomly course through their veins. I could smell it in both of them, and knew that it would only get worse.
Jake and I talked, while Mike sat sullenly in the back. I knew that he was annoyed; it was coming off in thick waves.
We eventually got to the theater, just when I thought I couldn’t take it anymore. I got out quickly, with Mike and Jake following. I had already bought the tickets when they found me. Whoops. Went a little too fast.
Neither of them seemed to notice, though. They both were too busy sizing the other up, seeing who would get the prize.
We went into the movie. This was defiantly not romantic. Five people died in the opening credits.
I watched it, silently thinking about how much Alex and Aaron would like this. Alex would like the violence, and Aaron would like watching Alex’s face whenever something weird happened.
As the movie progressed, I began to smell something odd...sickness. I glanced at Mike, who was faintly green. I realized that either the movie was too much for him, or he had the stomach flu.
I glanced at him every now and then nervously, waiting for him to blow. He finally got up half way through the movie, running for the bathroom.
“Come on, let’s see if he’s alright,” I muttered to Jake, who smiled and got up.
“Alright then. Anything to get out of the movie. I thought it was supposed to be good!”
I smiled apologetically, and waited while he helped Mike. He came out a few minutes later, silently laughing.
“He’s puking his guts out in there,” he snickered. I frowned at him, and he noticed. “Sorry. It’s just, well, you should go for a guy with a strong stomach.”
“I’ll look out for one,” I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.
Jake went over to sit on one of the benches by the wall, and patted the spot next to him. I went over to sit down. When I sat down, he put his arms around my shoulders.
I leaned away instantly. “Jake,” I protested. He put his arm down, not bothered by the rejection. Instead, he took my hand, and tightened his grip when I tried to pull away. I knew I could rip my hand from his grasp, but decided to listen to what he wanted to say.
“Now Bella, I need you to tell me something,” he started calmly. I grimaced. I couldn’t do this. I already had several meltdowns this week, and I couldn’t handle another. But I also didn’t want to hurt Jacob. He was human life saver.
“What,” I muttered.
He looked at me seriously. “You like me, right?”
“You know I do.”
“Better than that kidder?” he gestured to the bathroom, where Mike was currently being sick, by the retching sounds coming from it.
“Yes,” I sighed.
“You like me more than any of the other guys you too, right?” He seemed so calm, so serene, it was unnerving. But I answered as truthfully as I was allowed to.
“More than the girls, too,” I pointed out. Becka, Aaron and Alex didn’t count. They were my family, my bothers and sisters.
“But that’s it,” he said. I just nodded. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but I didn’t want to lead him on. He grinned. “That’s okay, you now. As long as I’m your favorite, I’m good with it. I’ll be annoyingly persistent.”
“I can’t change, Jake,” I said calmly, though I knew there was some sadness in it. I couldn’t change at all, not now.
He looked at me thoughtfully. “It’s still him, isn’t it?” His voice was soft and serious.
I cringed, blocking the pain that came. It was funny how he noticed that about me. I made all of my emotions go to the back of my mind. I knew I would have hell to pay for doing that later, but I needed to stay coherent right now.
“You don’t need to talk about it,” he said gently. I nodded, grateful. “But don’t get mad for me for hanging around, okay? I’m not giving up: I have loads of time.”
I sighed sadly. And I had much more time than he did. “You shouldn’t wait for me, Jake,” I mumbled, even though I wanted him to. I wanted to keep him, the friend who knew me almost as well as my siblings.
“It’s what I want to do. As long as you want me, I’m here.”
“I can’t imagine not wanting to be with you,” I said honestly.
“I can live with that,” he said, beaming.
I looked at him severely. “Just don’t go and expect more, alright?” I warned him, trying to pulling my hand away. He held on tightly, and I couldn’t draw back without damaging his fingers.
“This doesn’t bother you, does it?”
I shook my head. It felt good. His hand was so warm in my icy ones. It was like a small fire beside me. He was warmer than other humans. “No,” I sighed.
“So what’s the problem?”
“The problem is that this means something different to me than it does to you, Jake,” I said.
“Well, I guess that’s my problem, then,” he said, grinning. I rolled my eyes, and he chuckled.
Just then, Mike stumbled out of the bathroom. Even from across the room, his sickness seemed to make my stomach queasy, if it could be. His face was green with a thin sweat sheen.
“Mike!” I said, jumping up. I went over to him, and helped him walk outside. I could hear his body weakening. He needed to go home.
“Do you mind if we leave early?” he rasped.
“Of course not,” I said as I led him to Jake’s car. I looked around for him when we got there. He didn’t appear to be around.
“Here you go,” came his cheerful voice from behind me. I turned, and saw him hand a popcorn bucket to Mike. It was a good idea, if he wanted his seats to stay clean.
I helped Mike into the backseat, and then got in beside Jacob. He started drive, anxiously looking back at Mike at every bump in the road.
I was feeling guilty. I had encouraged Jake, even though I had tried to tell him the truth. How could I tell him the whole truth? That I was a vampire who could disguise herself as a human and that I spent almost every night with other vampires like me? That my heart had been taken by another vampire who shattered it, and all that I had left were a few fragments?
I knew that I couldn’t send him away, though. I was much too selfish. I needed Jake to survive just as much as I needed my coven. If they all left me, or I them, I would go insane. I would become totally useless. I probably could go into a museum and pretend to be a statue to pass the time.
Jake dropped Mike off at him house. I was grateful; the sent of his sickness was beginning to get to me. It was that scent from the woods all over again.
However, when Jake started to drive me home, I realized that the scent wasn’t gone. It was still in the car. It was faint, like it was either almost too small for my senses to notice, or it was old. It didn’t smell old, though. It smelled like it was right next to me. I realized it was coming from Jacob.
But he had smelled fine at the movies, I thought to myself. But I couldn’t shake the feeling that it came from him. When he got closer to me, the scent was stronger; when he moved away, it was weaker.
“Are you okay?” I asked Jake when he pulled up into my driveway. He looked as if something was bothering him.
“I think I might have caught whatever that other kid had. I feel…weird,” he said uncertainly.
“Oh no, not you too! Do you need me to drive you home?” I offered.
He shook his head. “No. I don’t feel sick yet. Just…wrong. I’ll pull over if I need to.”
I looked at him worriedly. “Call me when you get home, alright?” I asked anxiously.
He frowned. “Sure, sure, of course.”
I nodded, and turned to get out of the car, but he grabbed my wrist. I looked at him curiously.
“I’ve got something to tell you. I know its kinda corny, but just listen all the same, okay?” I nodded, and he went on. “I know that your really depressed and everything all the time. I just want you to know that I’ll always be here for you, alright? I promise not to let you down.” He said.
“Oh Jake, thank you,” I whispered. He beamed at me, and let me out of the car. I stepped out, and watched him go with my face masked with the darkness. I breathed in the fresh, untainted air, and wondered what could have caused the odd smell.
I also thought about Jake. He was such a great person, and he deserved better than me. I wasn’t whole; I was a broken piece of glass. I was fragmented, but still fragile.
I was angry at myself as well, though. You know better than to let someone into your heart, I chastised myself as I stepped into the dark living room. Charlie must have already gone to bed. I could hear his even heartbeat, and his quiet snoring.
I knew that when you gave your heart to someone, they could do whatever they wanted with it. They could cherish it, watch out for it, or they could break it.
Mine was broken beyond repair.
No amount of time would heal me, and I had a lot of time on my hands. More than anyone else I knew, outside of my world.
I went up to my room, and got changed into some sweats just as it began to rain. I looked worriedly out of the window. What if Jake got to sick, and couldn’t make it home? Or what if he couldn’t see in the rain?
As I stared out the window, I heard the distant sound of wolves. It didn’t sound like normal wolves: it was too powerful, held too much knowledge for an animal to possess.
But something about it calmed me down. It was almost as if they were telling me not to worry, that everything would be alright.
I only hoped they were right.
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