What would happen if the Cullens were real? What would happen if the fans found out about it? A halarious story that is sure to have you bent over in laughter!!Chapter 2: Why Me? is UP!! I wont post another chapter till i get at least 20 so reviewreviewreview!!!
Here ya go guys! This is my first fic on this site. Enjoy.
1. Oh Fu--...
Rating 5/5 Word Count 947 Review this Chapter
Chapter One: Ohh Fu--
"Oh My God!" Edward practically screamed as he ran into the house.
"Whats wrong Edward?" Alice asked running up to him.
"A hoard of about 50 girls swarmed me when I got out of school today! All of them thinking things that make me want to run out of Forks and never come back!! My God! I don't think I can take much more of this!!"
Alice giggled and Edward glared at her, "Oh come on Edward, if it was happening to me you would be laughing too."
"Alice, if it was happening to you you would be thrilled by the prospect of having so many shopping partners." Edward said in a monotone.
"True, true.." She agreed.
"Aw, whats the matter Eddie? Can't handle a few fan girls?" Emmett said from across the room. "I actually think its a little fun." he grinned
"Emmett, YOU can't read whats going through the heads of your fans. An believe me, you don't want to, some of the things those girls think are enough to make me want to run screaming in the other direction." He finished, a shiver running down his spine.
"Don't be a child Edward," Jasper said coming down the stairs "at least you don't have to feel the emotions flowing off of that crowed, every time I go outside. It comes at you so hard and from all sides its like drowning."
"Its just so annoying, I wish the most grusim fate on this Meyer person for this." Edward mused
~2 months earlier~
"Hey Edward, what are we going to do here in Seattle?" Bella asked him.
They had come to the city a few days into spring break.
"No reason really, I just thought you might like to come to the city and look around, I knew you were wanting to get a few new books anyway." He shrugged
They got out of the car and headed into a book store were a crowed of people were all converging in on the same few isles of books and around the register. They looked at each other, confused. Book stores usually weren't this full of excitement.
"I wonder what all this fuss is about." Bella wondered aloud.
"Haven't you heard! The newest book in the Twilight series is out! Everyone wants one!" a girl close by said before rushing off into the frey.
"Wow, must be a good book to cause such a fuss over." Bella said
"Would you like one?" Edward asked her
"It sounds like there is more than one. She said series." Bella replied
"Well we'll just get all of them." Edward smiled at her.
They walked into the crowed, Edward being careful to keep Bella away from the flailing arms of the people around them. When they reached the shelves they spotted a three set collection of books with the word TWILIGHT on the side of the case.
"Well this must be the source of all the hubbub." Edward said picking up the case.
Bella picked up a singular book and started reading the back cover of it, her eyes went wide and she opened up the book and started to flip through it huredly. She looked up at Edward with a look of shock on her face.
"Bella? Bella whats wrong?" Edward asked, concerned.
Bella just shook her head and let the book slip out of her hands. Edward cought it before it hit the ground and flipped through it and his mouth dropped open. If he had been expecting something, it defenatly was not this.
"Edward..what does this mean?" Bella asked in a breathless voice.
"I don't know Bella.." He said shaking his head.
They decided to buy the books anyway, to make absolutely sure it was what they thought.
When Edward gave his credit card to the cashier he said "Thank you for your purchase Mr....... Cullen?" The lady looked at the screen with bugged out eyes then up to him, her mouth poping open in surprise. "Oh-Em-Gee..." she gasped with exaggerated slowness as she raked her eyes over Edward.
Then all hell broke loose.
"OH! MY! GOD! ITS FREAKING EDWARD CULLEN! HERE! IN MY STORE!!!" She screamed, jumping up and down
"Oh my god it is him!!"
"And there is Bella too!!"
"Oh my god!! I want to hug him!"
"NO ME FIRST!"
The crowd of squealing girls converged on them before ether of them could recover from the shock. One of them had thrown her arms around Edward from behind and another had griped Bella in a hug so tight she could hardly breath.
Then the glomping started.
One girl came running at Edward and threw herself into the air landing on him, knocking him to the floor, hugging him.
"I want one of his shoes!"
"I got his shirt!"
"I GOT HIS UNDERPANTS!!"
In the end Edward and Bella had escaped to the car and were speeding off down the road before anyone could come out to fallow them.
"What the HELL was that?" Edward asked
"Your asking me? I don't have any freaking idea!" Bella screeched, starting to freak out.
"Okay, okay. Lets just calm down now. This was probably just some kind of freak incident that happened to happen to us." he didn't sound very confident in his theory.
"Yes, well there's nothing to do now but wait it out I suppose." Jasper said.
"Oh but it'll be awhile yet," Alice said "This is going to be fun to watch." she had a wicked grin on her face.