I love him, mother
After Renée finds out about Bella's and Edward's wedding plans, she boards the next flight to Seattle. Can she really talk Bella out of it, or will she learn to accept her decision? ** The forgotten epilogue is now out =D
This is my first fanfic... I hope you like it. Reviews are greatly appreciated.
4. Comfort from the desperation
Rating 4.5/5 Word Count 1578 Review this Chapter
As soon as I was out of sight, I allowed my tears to come again. Trying very hard not to sob too loud for my mother to hear, I leaned against the wall next to the staircase. My feet wouldn’t carry me anymore.
But before I had time to collapse, I felt Edward’s marble arms pick me up and carry me to his room. He set me on his bed and hugged as tight as he could without hurting me.
We stayed like that for a while. Eventually, my no longer quiet sobbing started resembling something like breathing again.
“Bella? Are you alright?”
Edward loosened his grip enough to be able to look at me in the eyes.
“Don’t be sad, please. I can’t take it.”
“How can I not be? You saw how my mom behaved today.”
“We’ll win her over. I promise.”
“You can’t promise that.”
“I think I might. Your last… confession really shocked her.”
“You mean my last lie? Yes, it probably did.”
“I’m sorry you had to lie for me.”
“You don’t have to be sorry about anything! Mom should be the one to apologize. I understand if she wants to talk to me that way, but why did she have to let all her frustration out on your family? She humiliated herself, and me!”
“Renée is only worried.”
“She has no reason to be.”
And it was true- Mom had every reason to be worried. But she herself didn’t know the real reasons.
“She not anxious about me becoming a vampire! She’s scared that you’ll turn me into some boring, old housewife!”
“And that isn’t the case, is it? So we can convince her that she is wrong.”
I couldn’t argue with Edward. He would twist anything I said to make it sound like we still had hope. But hope was long lost.
Renée was never going to change her mind.
“Bella… please stop crying. There’s always a solution.”
“No… not this time.”
I had another sobbing fit, and Edward took me tight in his arms again. He cradled me back and forth, stroking my hair, kissing my forehead, until I calmed down again.
“Did… Did th-they leave?”
“Carlisle offered them a ride back to the motel. Renée didn’t really want to leave you here like this, but needed some time to figure out what to say to you. Like I said, your speech in the end shocked her quite a bit.”
“Does it make any difference?”
“I think it does. Renée is much more worried about your health than the wedding now.”
My planned hadn’t worked. Instead of lessening her worries, I had only given Mom yet another reason to be scared for me.
“Shhh… it’s ok. It’s going to be alright.”
Nothing was going to be alright. Renée was against the marriage now more than ever, the Cullens were caught in the crossfire, and I needed to find out more about ovaries to be able to maintain my lie.
“I don’t want to see you miserable. I love you.”
Hearing those words was like seeing an oasis in the middle of the dry dessert. Yes, the current situation was hopeless, but what did it matter, when I had Edward here with me? My very own Greek god, my comforter, my fiancé... He was mine. I could get through anything in the world with that knowledge.
So I wiped the tears from my cheeks and took a deep breath. I’ll survive. I’ll live. And then I’ll die to be with Edward forever. Not a bad trade at all.
“So… do you know what you want to get me yet?”
This sudden change of subject confused me, until I noticed he was trying to distract me. I warmly welcomed the chance to think of something other than Renée for a minute, and took the bait.
“No, not really. I haven’t even thought about it yet, to be honest.”
“No wonder Alice didn’t see anything last evening. I was listening to her every thought, but couldn’t see what you were planning.”
“That is not fair! Please don’t try to figure out what I’m getting you. I want it to be a surprise.”
“That might be difficult.”
Edward’s eyes were full of reluctance.
“Fine. I’ll stay out of Alice’s head as well as I can. But I can’t promise anything- it’s difficult to block her thoughts. She’s screaming at me through them right now, actually.”
“Why is she screaming?”
“Well… She feels like I’m keeping you from her. She’d like to go through the invites with you again.”
I moaned. Alice had chosen the kitschiest wedding invites in the history of man, ivory with petals printed all over them. They were horrible. But I hadn’t objected- What did it matter, anyways? They could just as well be pieces of scrap paper with the date and time scribbled on them. All the fancy writing and pictures were just details that kept Alice pleased. She had free reign. For all I cared, she could dress me in a clown costume and play piñata with me. Not that I’d survive her swing of the bat.
“I don’t feel like wedding planning today.”
“That’s what I thought.”
Edward kissed me lightly on the forehead.
“You’ve calmed down? Do you want to talk about it now?”
I had calmed down. Though my face was still wet from my tears, my breathing had returned to normal and my brain functioned fairly well again. And we were having this conversation sooner or later, so it might as well be now. I sighed.
“What am I going to tell her? I know nothing about infertility… I won’t know what to tell her. And she definitely will ask.”
“I’ve been to medical school twice, remember? I can name you plenty of complicated diseases that might have caused it. You’ll just have to take your pick.”
“I’m not a good liar. Mom will see right through me.”
“She’ll be too ashamed to say anything.”
“Well, when she left, she was regretting the way she talked to you earlier today. She’d do anything to take it all back.”
“She was sorry?”
“Of course. She cares about you a lot.”
“What a great way to show it.”
“Be easy on her.”
Even though my mother had behaved so ridiculously with the Cullens, I still hadn’t forgotten her reasons for it. She loved me, and didn’t want me to end up like her. How could I be angry at her for that?
“I should go home. Charlie is probably waiting for dinner.”
“Are you sure? We could call and say you’re staying here for the night. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.”
Of course Charlie would mind. He didn’t like the thought of me and Edward sleeping even in the same house unless it was under his supervision. Little did he know that I shared my room with Edward every night… He’d have a heart attack if he found out. I thought it was all a little silly. After all, I was marrying Edward. I should be allowed to do whatever I want with my husband.
All in all, Charlie had taken in the news quite well. Of course he had screamed at first, and still didn’t approve, but he was being very grown-up about the whole thing. He never mentioned it anymore, which was just fine for me. I’d rather not talk about it with him, fearing that it might trigger the shouting again.
“Take me home, please.”
It was eight o’clock in the evening. I had told Edward to give me some privacy for a while, and assumed he must have gone hunting somewhere nearby. He most likely knew the reason behind my wish to be alone, so he hadn’t put up a fight when I told him to leave.
I needed to come up with something to give to Edward.
But what in the world could I give him that he didn’t already have? At first I thought of writing a list of things, then choosing the best idea out of them. But the piece of paper in front of me was blank. I didn’t even have one idea.
My present for him would have to be something special, something with a meaning.
Something he couldn’t just buy from the store next-door.
For my last birthday, Edward had given me a CD with him playing the piano. I guess I could put together one as well with his and my favorite songs on it. But where was the point in that, when he already owned an extensive music collection that dated back to the twenties?
Jewelry was even more pointless. A man didn’t need any, and Edward would make any diamond he wore only look pathetic. Besides, there was no way I could ever afford buying one.
Cologne? No, that was the stupidest idea yet. It would only cover his marvelous scent that I cherished. There was not a smell in the world that could compete with that.
It was useless. My imagination was running out; there was nothing precious enough in the world that could resemble my love for him. There was nothing he wanted…
And then it hit me. There was something he wanted that only I could give him. Something we both valued beyond measure.
And that was exactly what I was going to give to Edward.