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Dream's Shadow

Summary:
This is my take on the over- and usually poorly- done plot. Edward leaves Bella again. She is changed and they meet again in the future. There will be a big twist! Requested by Iris. Banner by Iris!

Notes:
Try it! I know stories like this usually stink, but I thought I'd give it a try. I own nothing. Stephenie Meyer owns all.

14. Chapter 14

Rating 5/5   Word Count 540   Review this Chapter

He lied to all of them. My entire family hates me. They think I left Edward.

Why? Why on earth would he do that?

I know. He knew someone would be blamed… and he didn’t want it to be him. He didn’t want his family to hate him. Why not turn that loathing to someone who would never again interfere with his life.

That was it. I shook the quiet impossibility whispering in the back of my mind.

Why would he be depressed if he didn’t love me?

He couldn’t love me. How could he love me? How could anyone?

The instant I’d turned my back, Jake had imprinted and saved himself from my love. Edward had left me twice. There wasn’t a chance he loved me.

If I deluded myself it would only hurt more. At least I didn’t have to sleep. At least I couldn’t have nightmares.

No, Edward didn’t want me. He wanted to never have to see me again… and I had taken away his choice for that in my disguised coming here.

I should leave. But I couldn’t bear the pain. I wasn’t strong enough to live on my own, I had proved that with my delusion hunting the first time, and now with this. I didn’t have it in me to live without at least his presence. I need something. I won’t ask for his love, but I need something, anything. Throw me a crumb, Edward. Let me stay here close beside you.

I won’t ask for more.

I promise.

I put my head down on the soft blue pillow and try to hold myself together.

I think maybe he loved me. Maybe it wasn’t all a lie. But he certainly can’t love me now.

No, once his affections had been mine, but they had been fleeting on his part. He hadn’t always been lying to me, what was the point?
He’d never been in love before. So the first time was strong and strange. He’d gotten caught up in bloodlust and mistaken it for regular lust which had tricked him into false love. That was all.

And he’d lied to cover that up. His family wouldn’t have understood. They were all so in love, and there love was the eternal vampire sort, not the fleeting romance of a teenage boy. Edward had never felt real love, so he mistook a stupid crush for what his family had.

Lucky he’d caught it in time.

I sob. It’s even worse now that I can’t cry. My arm makes its way around my waist, where I press it, trying to keep myself together. I cannot…

Then I remember. I am in Edward’s house. He will never know who I am, but I can spend the rest of eternity here, with him. He will never love me, and I know I will never love again, but at least, at the very, very least, I can see him. I can feel his loved presence and know I am whole.

He is here. I have again a heart to break every time I look on that perfect, unattainable face.