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Dream's Shadow

Summary:
This is my take on the over- and usually poorly- done plot. Edward leaves Bella again. She is changed and they meet again in the future. There will be a big twist! Requested by Iris. Banner by Iris!

Notes:
Try it! I know stories like this usually stink, but I thought I'd give it a try. I own nothing. Stephenie Meyer owns all.

86. Chapter 86

Rating 0/5   Word Count 554   Review this Chapter

“I understand. I understand better than you’d think, Claire. I love Edward… and now, I may look to you like I deserve him. But I was a human once, too. And believe me, I knew I wasn’t enough. Compared to him, him and all his absolute perfection, I was nothing. Worse than nothing. I felt like an inconvenience. A burden. I wanted nothing more than to be changed and deserve his love, and I knew it was nothing less than justice when he left.”

But… “You do deserve him. He loves you.”

“Now, maybe, I’m good enough to be beside him. I look the part, at least. I will never be as selfless and kind as he is. But I’ve come to accept that, at least some. The insecurity, the way it weighs on me, so heavily, like it’s crushing me, pushing down on me from all sides. That’s lightened a little. For whatever incomprehensible reason, out of all the women in the world he chose me. Me. He wants me. Me. And who am I to deny him what he wants? Does a little mistake here or there even the ground between us? Does his perfection make him somehow too good for me, so he can’t have me? I can’t keep anything from him. I love him too much.”

Her thoughts are flashing back and forth, private again. I catch glimpses of dark things I don’t understand, quite.

“Wait,” she says aloud. “Did you catch that last thing I was thinking?”

“No.”

“Good,” she replies.

I practically explode with curiosity, but I know it’s right to respect other people’s privacy, irritating as that privacy might be. “I guess my advice is to try to remember this is the way he wants it. Even if “I guess my advice is to try to remember this is the way he wants it. Even if you don’t think it’s the right thing for him, he does. It’s easier for me, I suppose, since I know better than to try to make choices for Edward. Whenever the reverse happens, he packs up and leaves, and everyone knows how well that works for us.”

So I’m the worst out of all four of us. I don’t deserve him, I got his love without his choice, and I left him. Brilliant moves on my part, she muses guiltily.

“You can’t think like that… I know how hard it is. I know. But you can’t expect him to live without you. He doesn’t want to.”

“Yeah. Not making that mistake again…” she pauses. “Thanks, Bella.”

“You’re welcome. Hey, can I ask you something?”

She nods.

“Do you know how Jake’s doing?”

“Jacob? Insanely happy. Like all the imprinted guys. He has absolutely no drama in his life. I like to think Quil and I are at least a little more interesting than that. All he and Alia do is stare into each others’ eyes.”

Surprisingly, that didn’t hurt like I thought it would. I mean, I loved Jake. I always would. But it was better this way.

Something to trump a soulmate, I thought privately. And smiled. “Glad to hear it.”

The conversation turns to more mundane avenues.