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Finding, Seeing, Loving Me

Summary:
It started with falling out of a tree and than jumping off a cliff. Both incidents changed Esme's life forever. Carlisle/Esme


Notes:
So this stoy consists of Esme's life when she first met Carlisle and until Edward meets Bella. Some chapters will be shorter then others because I am going by dates. I hope you enjoy it.


4. 1923-This is For Keeps

Rating 4/5   Word Count 1071   Review this Chapter

"Please, mom?"

My eyes flashed to him at that name. I had dreamed that someone would call me that for so long. I sighed and closed my eyes as I showed Edward the situation that had made me leave.

He was silent. "You are so smart, Esme. But why do you have to choose this issue to be so dumb in?"

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"You heard me. He wanted to come and get you, but I convinced him to let me come instead."

He paused suddenly, listening to something I could not hear. "He's worried. Hurt."

"I didn't do anything."

"So you think."

Edward was angry, I could tell. Angry at...me? It did not make sense. "He opened up to you, you know. Only you. He told you things he never would tell me."

Tanya had said something similar. Was he really more distant with his own kind then he was with me and humans?

"Yes. He is."

"I've been hurt too," I said. "More than you know."

"I. Do. Know. I saw it in your mind remember. You both are-" he broke off. "Just come back, please. We can talk about it at home."

I sighed and looked down at my hands. "I don't want to talk about it."

"That's mature," he said with a roll of his eyes.

I gave him a weak smile. "Come on Esme. I hate seeing you two like this. I need both of my ‘parents' if you don't mind."

"Alright," I said slowly. "I'll come home."

Edward sighed in relief and took my hand, pulling me upwards. "Thank you."

I said goodbye to Carmen, who took me aside. "Do not jump to any conclusions. Let him finish speaking."

I frowned and nodded, before following Edward.

We made it home by late evening. The lights were on inside the house and I could see the shadowy figure out Carlisle sitting at his desk.

I stopped and swallowed and Edward touched my arm. "He's relieved we're back safely."

I nodded and followed him up the stairs. He stopped at the door. "I need to go hunting. Good luck." And he was gone.

I stared at the door for who knows how long. It really needed painting. I should probably fix that sometime soon. That is, if Carlisle let me stay. I swallowed, took a deep breath, and opened the door. Silence and darkness met me. Out of habit, and because I was stalling, I lit the lamps. I could hear pacing from the office.

Perhaps he was nervous too. I couldn't understand why. He hadn't fled the house distraught.

The light in the house made me stop short. The furniture was all in place and there were fresh cut flowers arranged in vases around the room.

He and Edward must have moved everything in. It was beautiful. Exactly how I would have done it. Edward's piano stood in the corner gleaming. He must have shined it again. He did that often.

"You came back."

I jumped in surprise, but didn't turn around. I couldn't look at him. It would hurt too much.

"It looks lovely," I said, referring to the house.

"I couldn't have you living in a place with no chairs, could I?"

He was walking closer.

"I can still stay, then?"

"Of course," his voice came from directly behind me and I had to turn around.

I tipped my head slightly so I could look him in the eyes. They were a very dark gold, darker than he usually let them get.

"You're thirsty," I said softly.

"Just a little," he replied.

I closed my eyes. "I-I'm so sorry I ran out like that."

"No. I understand."

"I'm sorry," I murmured again.

"You've been hurt, Esme." He looked away.

The sound of my name made me shiver. "That was a long time ago."

Carlisle laughed slightly. "You won't be thinking that in a hundred years. Five years will be nothing. I can wait that century. I've waited many."

"For what?" I asked, confused.

Carlisle stared at me quizzically for a few seconds. "Why were you so upset, Esme?" he finally asked.

I looked down at my feet. "I'd rather not say."

Carlisle didn't say anything as he waited for me to crack. I always cracked for him. It was almost ridiculous. "It's just...when I was sixteen and you tended to me, I remember you being the most amazing person I had ever met in my life. I was intrigued. I had to know about you. I thought about you. I guess it's part of why I took so long to get married and why I finally settled with Charles." Saying the name no longer brought that rush of fear it once did, so I continued. "I thought I was dreaming when I woke up and you were there."

I finally looked up when he didn't say anything and found him looking at me with an unreadable expression. He reached out a hand suddenly and traced it over my face.

"And?" he prompted.

"I never felt safer. I still feel safe and loved, even if you don't really love me as much as I love you."

Carlisle's jaw went slack. I don't think I had ever seen him looked so surprised or anyone who still looking good with their mouth hanging open. "Edward was right," he finally forced out. "Esme-"

"Don't say anything, please," I begged.

He shook his head and put his hands on my shoulders, looking down at my face. "I should," he said softly. "I probably should have told you sooner, but...I didn't want to scare you. I do love you. Very much. More then you could ever know."

I felt like crying again, but this time it was not from pain. He...loved me. Saying it like that made it sound so sappy and...strange. It was true though. Before I could say anything, he kissed me. Charles had never kissed me after our wedding and I realized that I had missed that small, loving, connection. Carlisle's lips were soft and somewhat inexperienced, but then again, so was I. He smiled at me softly when he pulled away, keeping an arm around my waist.

"Will you marry me?" he asked. "So I can introduce you to the people of this town as my wife?"

I nodded slowly and kissed him again.