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Alone Again

Summary:
"It was only a matter of time--and not much of it--before i showed up at your window and begged you to take me back. I'd be happy to beg now, if you'd like."--New Moon, chp. 23 Alternate approach to New moon--What if Alice didn't see Bella jump?


Notes:
Ok, just FYI, this is in Bella's point of view the night after she jumps. Alice didn't see Bella jump, so she doesn't come.... I am curious to see the kind of responses i will get from this...


3. Chapter 3

Rating 5/5   Word Count 418   Review this Chapter

(Bella’s point of view)

“Edward?” I sprang out of bed, sprinting to the window. Was it really Edward there? Or was this just an advanced hallucination? I swear I had seen his hair…

But as I looked through the window, no one was there. It was just a hallucination… but it had seemed so real…

The edges of the hole in my chest seared, and I clutched my stomach with one hand, doubling over. Allowing the tears to flow, I scolded myself for hoping. He wasn’t coming back, no matter how many times I wished he would. He didn’t love me anymore…

*****

(Edward’s point of view)

Oh crap. What did I just do? Beside the fact that I broke my promise of a “clean break”, I also reawakened the love inside of me. I recalled her face, tear-streaked and sleep-deprived, yet still the most beautiful thing I had chanced upon in a hundred years, and sank to my knees. She was so…beautiful. It went deeper then outward appearances, deeper then any sort of makeup could account for. She was pure.

I scolded myself. Why was I thinking these things? She was happier this way…or at least better off. I recalled the tears that I had seen sliding down her cheeks, she couldn’t be happier. No, not after I had broken her heart.

I cursed my existence for the hundredth time since meeting Bella. How could I do this to her? I remembered the pain on her face when I left her in the forest, recalled her sad face.

Then Satan, hidden in the back of my mind, whispered take away the pain, go back to her.

It sounded so promising, my dead heart leapt in my chest. I could just run back to her window and take her into my arms—just as I had fantasized a million times over. We would be together again—I would be whole again. No doubt I would have to get on my knees and beg—but I would be happy to, if it meant I could be with her.

This definitely sounded promising. The thought of her warm, scarlet cheeks and big brown eyes was enough to make my heart swell with longing. I needed her…

But a picture of her, crumpled on the ground, smashed against the mirrors the time James had tracked her snaked into my head and I banished the thought. I would not do that to her. Not again.