Edward's New Moon
so shockingly, it's just as the title might suggest. it's short. it's set soon before Rosalie screws Edward up.
i've tried this 3 times now. i hope it works
1. Chapter 1
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If only I were human enough for her. But this was so wrong, our bittersweet romance. I love her so much it made my heart swell uncontrollably. Well I have left her, the Angel. The most selfless, caring person, the little known glory of the world. I deserved every pain imaginable if it meant Bella never needed to frown again. I love her.
Suddenly my love brought me to my feet. I’d go to her. I’d find her. I’d explain everything. I’d apologize.
Oh I was to weak. I tried to make it to the hole but couldn’t. suddenly a grimy rat ran passed by. He stopped at my left ankle to gnaw away for a half a second. Inwardly I smiled at the rat’s scattered and confused thoughts. He couldn’t understand. I looked like them but I was different, poor little rat I thought. I considered the fact that had I been with my dear Bella, we might have laughed, now I couldn’t manage that. I couldn’t even smile. I hadn’t done that in months. Three days before I left. I cease feeling any happy emotion.
Swiftly I reached down to eat the rat, I had enough strength to move now. I slowly (even for a human) walked back to the corner of the abandoned mining shaft I now lived in.
No, I couldn’t go and find her, she was happy now, told myself. I did my best to be happy at the thought that she might be with that awful Newton. He was nice I guess, at least he was human. He may not be able to protect her from the harmful things of the world that now (thanks to me) knew her name. Mike couldn’t handle sadistic vampires that would be on our tail had I not left, but he could take her endearing clumsiness. He could keep her safe from herself. I had to hope. No, it was fine. He would be good for her. Unlike her most resent ex-boyfriend.
I cringed. I was her boyfriend, and I managed to ruin that. How? I was gifted with her affection the greatest gift in history and I forced myself to throw it away due to what I was.
I suppose I should be thankful for my being a vampire, had Carlisle just left me human back in Chicago, I would be long dead. I’d never have met her. Never been exposed to the fairest beauty ever beheld. I’d have just died. Forgotten into a number of deaths from the Spanish influenza. I may not have known her long but I was still thankful.
Like a mentally unstable human, I rocked in the fetal position humming her lullaby. That was it. I have failed her. I had left her, fail to protect the reason for my existence form her number one most inevitable danger, my family and I. I was worthless. I was simply wasting room on the lovely planet. I was thrilled to be in this same world as the woman I worshiped. How fortunate I was, how I threw it all away.
I would call home.
I whipped out a scrap of paper from my filthy pants. I climbed over to my cell phone, charging off a dangerous outlet I had discovered. The wall plug sparked wildly when I approached. I came to the conclusion a rat attacked it. My phone was in my hand and I peaked my head out of the shaft to see whether it as day or night, whether I could come out or not.
My finger ran over the dirt encrusted keypad. One ring. Two rings. Three.
“yes?” asked a pissy Rosalie.
“is Alice there?” maybe she had seen a vision of whether mike and Bella were in fact happy together, if I would be ruining thing for her yet again to come.
“no Edward, she out for one last hunt.” She sighed. On last hunt?
“one last hunt?” I asked her confused.
“yes, she’s wants to go to the funeral. She figured some should represent our family.” She groaned as if she were saying the most obvious things.
“whose funeral?” I asked confused still.
“Bella’s, she committed suicide after you left. jumped off a cliff. Alice saw it. She’s going to see Charlie and stuff” I moaned as the pain in my un-beating heart swelled and hung up n her.
That was it. My love was now gone. Forever.
Why hadn’t I just left james’ venom get her last year I thought selfishly. I wouldn’t be in this position maybe. But no, I probably would. I wasn’t pure as her, the most glorious of all the angels. I wasn’t ever as brave or selfless, thoughtful, of caring. No, she would have defiantly left me soon after. I’d probably be back here.
I love her so. I’ll do it.
I’ve been considering it for the months.
Yes I’m not exactly sure how right now but I know I’ll anger the Volturi. They’ll kill me. Then I’ll see my sweet Bella, for a fleeting second, as she drifts gracefully to heaven and I plummet to hell. I treasure the moment forever.