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Being Her

Summary:
A series of one-shots in Claire's perspective throughout the series For Her.


Notes:
Um, will not go in any order. they come as i get bored enough to write them. PSSSTTT if you want a new story, go review with her!


7. Half Rescue

Rating 5/5   Word Count 964   Review this Chapter

Again just another dark empty day not knowing what to expect but definitely expecting something knowing it would come

Knowing he’d know Quil had come knowing he hated Quil knowing that as always the blame and the pain would fall on me I was so terrified I knew what was coming and it would not be good

Nothing in my life was just interspersing times of painful agony and anticipating more of it pain and terror taking turns one and then the other that was all I knew of life

I went outside with slow steps because I knew he would be waiting

But no

It wasn’t the him I expected

It was Quil and he was trying to smile but he looked just as afraid as me it was terrifying really it was and I didn’t know what he had to be afraid of he wasn’t going to get hurt because he’d come back that was me…

“Hey, Claire.”

“Hi,” I said. I knew he could hear the fear and I couldn’t bring myself to care because frankly I was too afraid

“Do you remember me?” he asked and it was a stupid question because of course I could never forget him he was so deep a part of me he was like a dream unforgettable I would never forget him

“Yeah. Quil… from before,” before the pain and fear and nothingness before I was nothing but weary terror Quil from before everyone was an enemy Quil from before when I was able to trust when I was able to love when people were still trustworthy when they wouldn’t hurt me Quil from when I could love him Quil from when I could let him love me

“Yep. That’s me. Quil from before. And I’m here to take you to your mom’s, or maybe Aunt Emily’s. Up to you.”

No it was bad enough he was here not this not more no no no no it was too much if he took me away if he took me with him Daddy would find me and… and… and I didn’t I couldn’t I… oh, no. no I couldn’t let this happen it was too much too much fear this… no.

And he smiled at me so hopefully but I had to tell him why because I couldn’t “I haven’t seen them in ages… I’m not aloud. Daddy’d be angry.”

I winced at that thought because anger and pain were twins ad they were so close together entangled in my mind and reality and where he was angry pain would follow

“Honey, I’m not going to let him hurt you. That’s why you’re coming with me… so your daddy can’t hurt you anymore. All right?”

Not all right. Not all right that he knew. How did he know? How could he have found out because soon enough his knowledge would come to light and there was no question or wonder to it I knew I would pay the price “How do you know?”

“I talked to him… he said that he had. And that made me angry. I don’t want to see you get hurt. You might not remember, but I love you very, very much, Claire. I want you to come with me so you’ll be safe.”

I did remember. I knew Quil, he was unforgettable but I didn’t know he would come I never thought he’d come I had tried to go to him but…

And that made me remember, what Daddy had said, what the truth about this so kind Quil was what he would do I couldn’t go with him

“Daddy said… he said not to trust you… he said you wanted to… wanted to…” I trailed off, ashamed. Because it was hard to believe in Quil’s compassionate smile their lay any malice any potential for shame and pain it was far easier to believe he was a liar than that Quil was

“Oh, sweetie, no. He’s lying. I’d never do anything to hurt you. All right? You don’t have to stay with me. You can live with your mom, or your aunt.”

And I looked into his eyes and I believed him and it had been so long so long since I had believed anyone “Aunt Emily. I don’t want Mommy… she never came.”

His dark eyes were large and they filled with tears I knew tears knew them well could it be he felt my pain could it be he cared it seemed unlikely but maybe just maybe there was a shadow of a hope

I had to have it to hold it close and pray

“I’m sorry,” he said like he did. Like it was true that he would be there that he did care after all

that there was someone in the world

who loved me?

Me?

I am not the kind of person who is ever loved I think that’s clear

But could it be he does?

“You need to get anything?”

“No. I don’t want his stuff… I want to start over.”

I wonder if I can. I doubt it. Could I truly forget all this is it possible the horror won’t follow me I doubt it but I can hope right?

Hope is something I’ve almost forgotten but like Quil it stayed forever in a way

“I’ll do my best to help” he said and it wasn’t just another statement, which had been made countless times before

it was a promise and he would keep it, because Quil wasn’t like the others

He cared

Didn’t he?