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Being Her

Summary:
A series of one-shots in Claire's perspective throughout the series For Her.


Notes:
Um, will not go in any order. they come as i get bored enough to write them. PSSSTTT if you want a new story, go review with her!


8. Abandoned Trust

Rating 5/5   Word Count 687   Review this Chapter

Yes. Yes he did he had to because the whole time he drove me home he let me sit and wonder

He didn’t try to make me talk he didn’t try to make me trust him and it proved I should that he was worthy

But I wasn’t sure I could that I had it in me I thought maybe I was just a little too weak a little too terrified

And I never knew when he would return when he would hurt me again because Quil could try to protect me but when he wanted something nothing stood in his way I knew that by now was I really safe I doubted it to tell the truth

It was my father’s car we rode in I wondered how Quil had gotten here I was so afraid sitting in this familiar seat but I stopped the fear he wasn’t the one who had ridden it before he was different he would never hurt me I knew he wouldn’t he didn’t have it in him he was so kind and good and though I didn’t deserve him to care I was so glad he did

The car stopped and I recognized Uncle Sam standing there and he didn’t look happy and I was smart enough to know that wasn’t a good thing not for me or Quil who had already become a part of me in a way.

Uncle Sam looked furious and I was so so afraid for us both because when men get angry bad things happen

I took shelter behind Quil and he hid me from the terrifying anger “What the HELL, Quil? Visit means VISIT, not KIDNAP!”

Quil wasn’t supposed to have me here Sam would make me go back and then… no… no… it would be worse than it had ever been before he would be furious he would probably kill me no he wouldn’t be that kind it would be worse than dying whatever punishment he chose he would torture me I would wish for death and never get it it would be horrible

Quil couldn’t protect me I knew it I would have to go back no no no no no

And he didn’t protest. But he did say something “Claire, honey, will you show him that bruise?”

I stepped forward and turned the cheek to him and then dived back behind Quil before he could do something bad I knew from experience that when I had visible injuries they led to more visible injuries because marks meant questions that he didn’t want to answer and it was always my fault and…

“Sam, he was hurting her. Hitting her. And… and… I can’t even say it, but I can see in your face you know what I mean. What do you want me to do?”

he knew about that too? But that was secret no one but me and Daddy knew about that all the people who’d ever asked questions hadn’t known it was my private shame and terror…

“Anything else,” Sam answered, and I knew then that I would have to return.

Quil looked at him just looked and said “Sam, what if it was Emily?”

This had a strong effect on him Quil continued and his visible grief grew stronger at the mere thought

“What if she was being beaten up by someone? Helpless, because you weren’t helping her? Unprotected, because you weren’t protecting her? What if someone was raping her? And she isn’t even an innocent baby. Don’t tell me you wouldn’t have done exactly what I did.”

“You killed Jack?” Sam asked and I didn’t believe it was possible can pain be killed can fear can death can evil I didn’t think so

“Yes,” though, he said, and I believed him.

Something, relief or sorrow or just not knowing some strong emotion filled me

“Good. And I’m sorry,” Sam said.

I could stay.

“So am I,” Quil replied. I followed him into the house.