A Change in Monsters
When Bella comes back from Renee's after Edward leaves in New Moon, she has trouble coping. Will she ever find love again? Sam/Bella
NO EMILY! Just so you know! She's not in this story, never will be...
1. Coming Home
Rating 5/5 Word Count 2044 Review this Chapter
When I stepped off the plane, my legs felt like they were going to buckle underneath me. They plane ride had made me forget that I actually weighed something.
Charlie had sent me to Renee for awhile after Edward left. He said he sent me so I would be able to stop thinking about him for awhile. But I knew that he just did not want to deal with me being all depressed. I really could not blame him.
I saw Charlie standing there awkwardly, moving from foot to foot, nervous to see me. When he saw me, his face lit up in his ear to ear grin. I wanted to run up to him, but I knew I would end up tripping, and I did not want to make a big scene. When I finally got up to him, I dropped my bags on the ground and threw my arms around him. I could tell that he was just a little shocked by my exuberance, but I knew that he was happy that he had missed everything that Renee had to endure.
"Hey Bells," Charlie said, squeezing me tightly. "Welcome home," I liked the sound of that more than he could possibly ever imagine; especially after Renee had forced me to go to a physiatrist.
"Hey Dad" I said, as he moved back to look me over.
"You look great, Bella. I think you look like you were starting to get a tan." We both laughed at this, knowing that it was most likely impossible for me to ever get a tan.
When we got to Charlie's house, I wanted nothing but to lay in bed. I knew I shouldn't though; Charlie would know that I still was hurting, even though it had all ready been four months for something.
I walked into the living room and sat down on the chair. I felt that chair sag slightly. I pretended to watch the game with Charlie. I had to get used to the town again. It would not be too difficult, but most likely just a little different.
"How was your trip?" Charlie asked, not taking his eyes away from the television.
"It was good," I said.
"That's good. How's Renee doing?"
"She's doing great. Same with Phil. I got to see some of his-" I stopped myself from going any further. I did not want to bring up baseball. I knew that I would not be able to handle all the memories that came with it.
"That's good," Charlie said quickly. "The sun seems to be trying to come out." I was glad that Charlie had decided it best if he had changed the subject, but not necessarily this one.
"Oh, yes." Charlie must've thought that this was going to be better to talk about, but I used to love it here when it rained, when I had Edward. Surprisingly, I did not grimace when the name came through my head. Maybe I was really over him.
"Tonight I was thinking about heading up to the reservation, if you wanted to come." My face lit up, I would get to see Jacob. I had been thinking about him these long four months, and tonight I would finally see him.
"That would be fun," I squealed, a smile playing at my lips.
Charlie seemed satisfied with my expression, and went back to paying attention to the game.
I was practically bouncing in the seat of Charlie's cruiser as we pulled up to Jacob's house. I opened the door and before I could even get out I was being wrapped in a tight bear hug. I hugged him back, the feeling of his warmth surrounding me.
"Hey, I've been waiting for you to come back," I heard his gruff voice whisper in my ear. "I thought you were going to stay with your mom for the rest of your life."
I laughed quietly. This is where I wanted to be, right here in Jacob's arms. I didn't want to let go.
"Bella, maybe we should go inside now." I could tell that he was trying to move out of my grasp, so I held on tighter.
"Bells, come on," Jacob said, walking me up the steps to his house.
When I got inside I was bombarded with the whole La Push gang. Embry and Jared were asking me which one of them I missed more. I told them that it was too hard to choose, because I missed them both so much. Quil came up to me being his Perky self. (Jacob had wrote to me earlier and told me that Quil had joined them.) Then Paul came up giving me a small hug.
"Welcome back, Bella," I heard him say as he backed away.
Then I saw Billy Black, and a smile flew over my face. Behind him, pushing his wheelchair was Sam Uley. I bent down and gave Billy a long, tight hug. I moved around his wheelchair to Sam and smiled before I through my arms around his neck.
Though, I would never admit it, I had missed Sam so much. He was the one that had found me in the woods after Edward had left. He did not know how grateful I was for him.
"Thanks," I whispered into his ears so no one else could hear. "For, you know." I let him go and I saw him give me a long look before he nodded slowly.
"Everyone, let's go sit down and eat," Billy said, probably knowing that all these boys were hungry. Even if they weren't they would still eat it.
I ended up with Jacob on one side and Embry on the other, Sam was across from me and Paul and Jared were on his sides, and then Billy had one end of the table while Charlie had the other.
The dinner consisted of lots and lots of Cokes, about ten breadstick containers, and about seven extra large pizzas. I only had three pieces of pizza and about two breadsticks; I was on my fifth Coke. I hadn't realized how hungry I was until I had taken the first bite of pizza.
Everyone was talking nonstop. The La Push gang and Billy were questioning me throughout dinner on my trip to Renee. When I told them that she had sent me to a physiatrist, all of them burst out into roars of laughter; well, all but Sam, who gave me a long look. It was almost pleading.
I looked down at my empty plate and felt my face warming up from his intense stare.
That started a whole other stage of laughing, because they all thought that I was blushing from them laughing at me.
After one more Coke, I excused myself to the bathroom. When I got there, I looked in the mirror. My face was many different shades of red and my hair was a little messed up. Thoughts of when Edward has mussed my hair came into play. Soon enough I noticed that tears were gliding softly down my face. Noticing them made me cry even more.
This was the first time since he left that I really expressed my feelings and let myself cry it out. I sat down on the closed toilet seat and wrapped my arms around my legs and placed my head gently on my knee.
After about five minutes of this, the tears still had not subsided. They just gradually came more and more. I knew that I could not go out there like this. Charlie would probably send me back to Renee the second he saw the state I was in, or he would take her idea and send me to a physiatrist, too.
I was shivering from the temperature in bathroom. I needed something warm like a blanket. Of course, there were no towels.
I faintly heard the bathroom door open and close, but made no notice of it. The next thing that I realized was that I was warm. I thought it was Jacob at first, but I could not smell his woodsy type smell. This person's smell was different, and better.
Sadly, the comfort of someone made the tears come more quickly. I didn't care if this person was Embry or even Paul, I just cared that at least I knew someone cared. I buried my face into their shoulder, and I felt their arms surround me hesitantly.
After a couple of minutes the sobs slowly died, and the tears followed after that. I moved my head and saw the large tear stain on the shirt.
"Sorry," I mumbled before looking up. It shocked me when I saw who it was. I have no idea why it shocked me so much. I just guess that I had never expected Sam to come and comfort me.
"Thanks," I muttered, feeling my face change more shades of red.
"Don't mention it." His voice was gruffer than Jacob's, yet still sweet. I could see that he was a little embarrassed; small patches of pink were forming under his dark, russet skin.
I looked up at his brown eyes and found that they were smoldering, just the way that Edward's used to do.
"Are you feeling all right?" He asked. It reminded me of when he had found me in the woods and he had said, have you been hurt.
I started to nod, but then decided to tell the truth and shook my head. "No," I said weakly.
"Do you want me to take you home?" I could tell that Sam was trying so hard to help me.
I shook my head. "I don't want any of them seeing me like this." He nodded, telling me that he understood.
"Want some fresh air then?" I decided to nod my head, not really knowing why.
Sam scooped me up, and that's when I realized that my arms were still tight around his neck. I loosened them a little, but still kept them there as he walked me out into the windy weather. I started shuddering just a little from the cold and Sam tightened his grip around me.
I immediately sensed a feeling of warmth wash over me. I cradled closer to him, not wanting any of the cold to reach me.
All of a sudden I felt heat blowing on me. I sat up slowly looking around. I was Jacob's Volkswagen Rabbit and Sam was in the driver's side.
"What's going on?" I asked, yawning slightly.
"You fell asleep. I didn't tell anyone about your whole crying thing," Sam assured me.
"Thanks. Aren't you hot?" I asked, realizing that the heat was on full blast and that he must be burning up.
"Why yes, yes I am." He smiled at his sly comment.
"Gee, you're starting to sound like Jacob! I mean, are you extra... warm?"
"Not too much. We're almost to your house."
"How did you get me out of there?" I asked nervously, though curious about what he had told them.
"I just said that you were tired and that I thought they could excuse me to take you home. Jacob threw me his keys and told me to take the Rabbit." I nodded, excepting his story.
Soon I saw that we were on Charlie's street and I could see his house just up the road. I yawned once more, and stretched slowly as we pulled into the driveway.
"Thanks for everything, Sam. I really appreciate it." I sighed. "It's been hard for me since they left. I can tell that Charlie is worried that I might just burst into a million pieces one day. And Renee thinks that I'm clinically depressed. I know I'm not, though. I can all ready tell that I'm getting over him. I think that the crying helped." He nodded in agreement.
"Thanks again," I said as I opened the car door.
"No problem," he said putting the car into reverse. "And Bella, if you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm almost always available."
I watched as he backed out of the driveway. When the car was out of sight I walked inside and went to my room. The whole house felt too cold after I had gotten out of the warm car.
I threw on a cute pajama set that Renee had bought me and then dropped into bed, finally feeling that everything was going to be all right.
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- 26 May 08
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