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The Awakening

When something threatens to tear you a part how do you fight it? With words or actions? Through problems with their own relationship Bella and Edward learn the valuable lesson that love--and marriage is a two way street.


3. Chapter 3

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For the first sixteen years of my life, I was camouflaged against the backdrop of a typical high school. I didn’t have the ability to stand out if I tried. I walked through the motions of high school as a chameleon. When I moved to Forks, fate stripped that protective quality from me. Suddenly I was the center of attention. They all wanted to be my friend, my hero, whatever I needed there were three people there waiting to fulfill any request. Now, however, fate it would seem has granted the partial return of my camo.

There are ways to blend in as a vampire. One learns these tricks of the trade early on in being a vampire, if these regulations are not observed you risk discovery. Rule number one, never start a casual conversation, if invited respond but end the connection at the earliest possible convenience. To aid in avoiding conversations it is often helpful to dress slightly above the social scene, however this may cause some disturbance with blending in, it does however diminish the number of talkative people. Rule two, if said talkative people don’t get the hint and leave, dazzle them with your vampire-ness.

The plane wasn’t particularly crowded the nearest person to me sat across the aisle. She looked to be more interested in studying the safety manual than paying attention to me. When she looked up she smiled at me, I smiled back not wanting to attract attention as the moody teenager. It is best just to blend in with the crowd, which might be hard to do considering the lack of crowds on the plane.

“First time on a plane,” she confessed hesitantly.

“It’s no big deal.” I replied hoping that if I reassured her, she wouldn’t feel the need to prolong the conversation.

“You do appear to be the seasoned traveler.” She smiled brightly; apparently, she was in a talkative mood—great. She smoothed the pamphlet on her lap before returning it to the pocket on the chair. Clearly, she meant to make this into a conversation.

“My parents are divorced my dad lives on the west coast while my mom lives down south.” It was the truth to some extent, not the reason I was traveling today, but she didn’t need to know that. I smiled at her, hoping my vampire-ness would dazzle her into silence. Whether it was my comment about my parents divorce or my vampire skills, she didn’t speak again.

I sat down in one of the chairs; I pulled out the iPod Rosalie had given me thankful that I could lose myself in the pulsing hard rock beat that she loved. I plugged myself in and donned a pair of sunglasses so that people might think I was asleep and therefore not bother me. As I sat there, to the outside world the perfect disinterested teenager; my mind wondered over the past five years of my life. Blocking out thoughts of Edward, I concentrated on other members of my new found family.

My relationship with Rose is probably the strangest, our communication is limited, however, she seems to know exactly what I need and more importantly how to get it.

Rosalie was under the hood of the car, when I walked into the garage. Rob Zombie blared from recessed speakers, the music wrapped around me and I felt peaceful—odd considering her choice of music. I was escaping Alice who was insisting on an online shopping adventure that was totally unnecessary. Rosalie poked her head up when I entered, it’s insanely hard to sneak up on a vampire. She gave me a look that said ‘can I help you’. Where others may have used words, Rosalie communicated through this half language of looks, eye rolls, and the undeniable sighs.

“I was just looking around.” I got an eye roll with a half sigh for an answer, translation ‘whatever just don’t touch anything’ I found if you waited long enough she will consent to actual words, and after a while she finally gave in and asked.

“Can I help you with something or are you just going to stand there and look over my shoulder all night?”



“I just wanted to know if you had any motorcycles,” I said very softly. Rosalie could be classified as a princess but in the garage she is Queen, one does not touch things in there unless one has expressed permission of the Queen.

“If not that’s fine I was just.”

“There are two in the back,” she replied, then she looked at me and voluntarily offered, “Emmett and Jasper had a thing for motorcycles a few years back, it may take me a night to fix them up, but you’re going to need a mode of transportation sooner or later. We all can’t fit in the Volvo anymore.”


She held up a hand to silence me, “Oh don’t thank me yet, this is conditional.”

Of course, I expected as much. “And…”

“For goodness sakes let Alice get you some decent clothes.”

“I happen to like—“

“You may like what you want; unfortunately the way you dress would attract unnecessary attention.”

“And dressing like you would not?” I asked analyzing Rose’s baggy grease stained overalls and pink cami that she wore when working in the shop. Some how she still managed to look undeniably beautiful.

“No but at least if you wear semi designer labels people are a lot less likely to approach you in school, therefore it helps us keep a low profile.”


“So go shopping with Alice and I’ll fix you up a bike and I’ll even talk to Emmett into teaching you how to ride the thing.”

“Oh I thought-”

“Edward would never teach you how to ride Bella, trust me. With your luck you’d still manage to break your unbreakable neck.” If I was human, I would have been as red as a tomato, but I’m not; I was as pale as ever.

“Oh.” “Bella the woman may be the neck in a marriage but the atlas can only pivot so far around the axis before the head stops.” I must have looked confused because she rolled her eyes and placed a hand on her hip, translation ‘not everyone can be as smart as I am’ luckily she needed no incentive from me to translate voluntarily. “You really need to go to med school some day.”

“Oh,” I said quietly. That was the first time I found the Rosalie might indeed have a brain under all that blonde hair.

“Excuse me.” The flight attendant tapped me on the shoulder, “Would you care for something to drink?”

”No thank-you.” I resisted a more acidic reply of ‘My upchuck reflexes couldn’t handle it.’ She moved on and I once again fell into my trance like state.

“It’s hard isn’t it?” Jasper asked stamping through the wet foliage. I understood what he was saying, no vampire can be prepared for its calling. I shrugged, but secretly I agreed with him. I was still young, I reminded myself this every time I felt the prickle that fresh human blood sent through my body. Every day as I watched Edward and my other siblings leave for school and I stayed home with Esme. I didn’t regret it, I just felt like I couldn’t progress fast enough. When I felt like this, I often wondered into the woods, animal blood did not have the same appeal as human blood.

“Admit it,” he encouraged, “They say admitting that you have a problem is the first step in acceptance. So just-”

“Alright,” I said just to shut him up, “I admit, I have a problem with human blood. What’s next? Dr. Jasper?”

“I was just coming to offer my support.” It’s time like these that I forget that Jasper struggles with the same problem. How quickly human memories can fade when one becomes part of the undead, my eighteenth birthday all but slipped me mind.

If I had been smart, I would never have poured out my soul to Jasper, I would have gone to Edward, but hindsight is always twenty-twenty. I should have known, that somehow, someway it would all get back to Edward. His reaction, well wasn’t completely unexpected, I had omitted some facts about my blood lust from him. Why? Good question, I guess I just felt that he couldn’t understand. He’s always in control of his needs he survived being around me. His perfection never ends. That was our first fight, and it was bad enough. The problem only got worse when I found out that Jasper didn’t tell Edward. Edward read his mind, that’s when it sucks to be a the wife of a mind reader .

I struggled to pull myself out of the memory, the words thrown at each other that we would both regret latter. They stung, sliced easily through the heart, and hung untouched in the air leaving us to dance around them every time we ventured in. I tried to concentrate on something else anything else. My mind must have taken the word anything seriously, because it pulled me into what felt like the very distant past.

“You don’t have to do this, you know?” he said it very quietly, his velvet voice was almost over powered by the soft jazz playing in the background. He ran his cool hand over my check again as if he was trying to remember the exact warmth, texture, and color of my skin. I felt my heart race as I looked into his eyes, and I knew there was no other way. Perhaps I had always known from the first time that I saw him that I would someday have to make this choice. Edward was too perfect to lose.

“Yes,” I replied, more sure then ever that this was what I needed to do. His face fell, he was angry, or torn perhaps, he never fully explained anything. Well, he tried but I was beginning to understand that understanding vampires is hard, especially when you are still human. “But it’s my choice to make.”

He smiled now, just the corners of his mouth turning up. “And in thirty years will you regret it?”

“I never regret time with you,” I replied gently smiling, “It’s the time that I’m not with you that I regret.”

“You are insane.”

“I believe we have already discussed the subject of my sanity, and it comes out the same every time. I am quite insane, because I love you.”

Am I still sane? I wondered, no I thought a sane person would not put someone they loved through hell…then again I’m not entirely human anymore. Though if he’s smart he’ll read the end of the letter, or at least I hope he will. I spent a great deal of time writing that postscript, it was simple but told him everything he would need.

P.S. I’m leaving for Forks, if you ever get there I’ll be waiting.