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Goodbye

Summary:
Alternate ending to New Moon. As the months continue Bella continues to slowly heal. But tragedy strikes again, creating a domino affect with everything in her life. With Edward gone, who will save her? New chapters finally added!


Notes:


18. Chapter 18: Final Goodbyes

Rating 5/5   Word Count 1918   Review this Chapter

Standing at the back door
She tried to make it fast
One tear hit the hardwood
It fell like broken glass
She said sometimes love slips away
And you just can't get it back
Lets face it

Carrie Underwood - Wasted

* * *

Now it was time to see Jacob. I was dreading this ever since I realized what had happened to me. I wasn’t ready to face him, and probably never would be, but I had no other choice. This is why I came, to say my final goodbyes.

Even though it was ridiculously late, the house was bright with life. I could hear their voices before the house even came into view. Suddenly there voices came to a complete stop, all were silent, listening for the visitor that had suddenly appeared. I recognize Paul give out a thunderous howl.

I knew this was a bad idea.

Then Jacob came rushing outside. I hoped even though I was vampire he would still recognize my scent. He on the other hand, smelt horrible. When I was a human he smelt good, but now as a vampire their smell made me gag.

“Bella!”

I was surprised that he still ran to embrace me, but once he took in my full appearance, he backed away.

“Hi Jake.” I said with my head bent low. I didn’t want to see the sudden disgust that I knew was written all over his face.

I stopped breathing, so not to smell the rancid odor that was coming off of his skin. It almost made me hate him for just that reason alone.

“Bella, you really are a vampire. I could smell you from far away, but now to see how drastic you’ve changed.”

“I tried to tell you.”

The rest of the pack was heading towards where Jake and I stood. All there faces were filled with anger, but yet were sad to see that what I had told them was true.

“Hi guys.” I said acknowledging the rest of the pack.

“Bella? That can’t be you.” Jared exclaimed.

“Yeah it’s me.”
“You really are a vampire. Like a full bloodsucker.” now it was Embry.

“Guys stop!” Jacob yelled at them, frustrated. I could see in his eyes that he really hoped that I was playing some cruel joke on him.
“So are you going to explain what happened?” Sam asked in a harsh tone.

They hate me.

“Could you give Bella and I some time alone before you rail her with questions.” He wasn’t asking at all, but was demanding that they leave.
“Come guys. Jacob wants some time alone with the leech.” Paul growled.
His words stung me so deep I almost leaped across the short distance between us and ripped him to shreds. I couldn’t believe that he would hate me so much for something I didn’t even want.

“Paul!” Sam yelled.

He was already walking away before anyone else could say anything. They followed Paul back into the house, where Sam continued yelling at him.

“He really didn’t mean that, he’s just…upset that you’re one of them.”

“But it’s not like I asked for this. I didn’t want this, it’s not like I went looking for her, and said ‘here bite me.’ ” Jacob listened intently as I started venting. “I fought Jake. I fought so hard. I tried to

run, but she caught up with me in like two seconds.”

I felt a rippling pain in my chest. If only tears were possible.

“Bella why did she change you?”

“She wasn’t. But then I told her that vampire powers were immune to me so she changed me so I would be part of her coven….”

I continued telling him of all the trials I had been through in such a short time. From killing her, to feeding, the plane ride, and then Charlie. I excluded from telling him about my powers, and also excluded seeing Alice. I knew how much they despised the Cullen’s, and I didn’t need him to find out that there was one lone vampire in Forks that left me for dead. He probably would hunt her down himself.

After I had finished he didn’t speak for a very long time. So I finally decided to break the silence.
“Jake I really did fight. I never wanted this.” He didn’t need to know that this was what I once wanted under completely different circumstances.

I moved forward to put my hand on his arm, but he backed away. I realized that everything we once had no longer held any substance to what I had become. We were now enemies, that’s it.

“Bella we can’t be what we used to be.” I knew that he was going to say this, but I had hoped that he would be able to look past my appearance…and smell, and realize I’m still the Bella he fell in love with. “Sam and the others have been fighting all day about what we should do.”

“Do?”

“You’re a vampire now.”

“I know what I am!” The anger and the pain that had festered for days, found it’s way out. I could feel all the hatred that vampires held towards werewolves, but I would not give in. He was a werewolf, but he’s still my Jacob. “I didn’t ask for this! How can you end everything we had because of something I couldn’t control? I’m still me.”

He looked away from me and back at the house. “Because you aren’t Bella anymore. You’re a leech,” he said that word with such venom, I felt his fury deep in my bones. “And that makes everything we once had dead. The Bella I knew and loved is dead.”

I couldn’t believe that he said that to me. Although I couldn’t stand the way he smelt, or was feeling hatred for him that really wasn’t even my own, I still loved him, but to him I was dead.

The whole in my chest ripped wide open and I almost collapsed. My knees felt weak, and everything was spinning.

“I can’t believe you Jacob Black! You can’t do this to me!”

“It’s already done. You must follow the treaty like the rest of those damn bloodsucking Cullen’s, or else we’ll be forced to…”

He let his words linger in the air. His mouth was saying the things that Sam and the others wanted him to say, but his eyes were calling out to me.

“Or else what Jake? Or else you kill me!”

He didn’t answer. I knew that if they were forced, they’d kill me.

“Please Jake.” I begged.

This was not at all how I saw this meeting going. I new that things would be different, but for him to outright say he basically hated me, that I was dead, killed what hope I had left.

“Please leave our land now.” he said quietly pained.

“Please…” I begged wishing that he would give in and take me back.

“I’m sorry Bella.” He turned his back and ran into the forest.
I stood there stunned by this words, frozen in place by his resentment. The curtains in his house closed, then the lights turned off. It was over.

I found my legs and started running. I knew where I was going, I had a score to settle. They did this, and they would fix it.

I finally made it to the big white mansion, that I now wished I could burn down, the way Jacob and I burnt down Emily’s house. The thought of Jacob made my stomach turn.

I ran full force into the door, and it went flying off the hinges.

“Bella?”

Alice was completely taken by surprise from my sudden entrance.

“You did this, you fix it.” I said grabbing her shoulders and shaking her with all my strength.
“What?! Bella please you’re hurting me.”

I knew my strength was to much for her to handle.

“It’s all your fault! How could you just leave me here?!” I cried.
I was angry at Jacob and the others, and I was angry at Alice and the Cullen’s. But right now I needed my best friend. I didn’t want to be alone anymore.

“Bella I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“I lost everything because of you…EVERYTHING!”

I fell to the ground and curled up into a ball. The heartache and silent tears burst through the surface of my carefully place walls. My body convulsed from the unspeakable amounts of pain that rippled through my body.

I felt Alice’s warm body sit next to me and pull me up into her lap. She felt amazingly comforting. She brushed her hand along my hair, and cooed as if I was a fussy baby.

“Shh…Bella. I’m sorry for everything that’s happened to you. I can’t even imagine what type of pain you’ve been through.” Her words were stained with sorrow. “I’m so, so sorry. Please don’t me mad at me, I never wanted any of this to befall on you.”

I looked at her eyes, they were filled with guilt. I knew her words were sincere.
“Oh Alice, I’ve missed you.” I cried wrapping my arms around her small frame.

“Bella?”

She was now shocked at my sudden change, going quickly to being so resentful to loving her all over again.

“I don’t understand.”

“Alice I could never be mad at you. I was hurt, and so confused. I blamed you for what Victoria did to me, but it was my fault.”

“How do you figure it’s your fault. You’re right if we hadn’t left you, she would never had been able to get to you.”
“That’s true. But it’s my fault for falling in love with a vampire in the first place.”

“Bella you can’t help who you love.” I fell back into her lap and she continued to stroke my hair. “I’m sorry we left you. I just couldn’t see. Edward made me promise to stay out of your life and not to check up on you.”
“So really it’s his fault.” I said. It was technically his fault for making them all leave me. “But you also can’t help who you don’t love anymore.”

She sensed where I was going, so she quickly changed the subject. “What happened?”

I just explained everything to Jacob I didn’t really feel like going through all of it again. “There’s a lot to explain, not now, please.”

“Alright, but you will explain later. But for now can you at least explain to me why you have the faint smell of werewolf surrounding you?”

I forgot about the fact that Alice didn’t know I was best friends with a werewolf.
“Well you know Jacob Black.”

“Yes.”

“Well he’s sort of was my best friend.”

“Ok…and…”

“He’s also sort of a werewolf.”
“Of course. Only you, Bella Swan, could find the only other monsters in this town.” She was right, I was a magnet. “Why did you say was?”
“Well because look at me.” I sat up and pointed at myself. “I’m everything they hate, and try to protect everyone from. I now have to follow the treaty you and the rest of the Cullen’s abide by.”

“I see. Is that where you were before you came here?”

“Yes.” I said innocently.

Both our heads quickly shot to the front door, that no longer actually held a door. We both could smell his scent coming straight for us. I looked back at Alice, panic consumed me.

“Alice I thought you said you came alone.”

“I know. I did.”

Suddenly he appeared, his entire body was filled with such raged I thought I could see steam coming off his skin. His hair was messy from running. His nose flared with the scent of my skin. His eyes were wide with the realization of what I had become. His beautiful lips pursed together.

My Edward…