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Before The Dawn

Summary:
And maybe tonight, We'll fly so far away,We'll be lost before the dawn...--'“I’m…sorry,” I whisper. My voice breaks. “I’m sorry,” I repeat. I spread my arms out like an eagle, letting another tear trickle out. There is pain—lots of pain. And regrets—too many regrets. I drag in another gasp of breath and let my foot take the last step back. My body tips over, and I let go.' ----- It's another new year, and Carlisle is hunting in a secluded forest spot when he comes across the scent of a human. He finds a beautiful girl, lying mangled on the ground in a pool of her own blood, coming closer and closer to being pulled into the ocean by the growing tide. Her heart beats are slowing, and she is muttering just one word. "Sorry." He is reminded of Esme, his true love, when he had rescued her directly from the jaws of death. Acting on instinct, he picks up the dying girl and bites her. Basically, what if Bella had joined Carlisle's coven earlier? Before she ever met Edward? And once they do meet, what the hell happens?


Notes:


6. Anger

Rating 5/5   Word Count 1494   Review this Chapter

I feel my world shake

I can't look away

Hard to see clear... Or is it fear?

I'm madly in anger with you

-----

Anger boiled through me like a raging fire, going through my veins not too differently than what it felt like in my own transformation. And the thought of transformations brought me again to where I was, and particularly what I was shouting about. Rosalie was standing next to me, her expression livid enough for both of us. She interceded when I paused, her thoughts incoherent – though I could make out a few of the un-ladylike oaths. The long-dead blue vein in her next stood out furiously against her pale neck, and for a second, if I had not had my perfect vision, I could almost swear it pulsed.

Carlisle, what did you do?!” She echoed after me, her eyes wide with anger. ”We go hunting for three days and there’s a newborn vampire that just appeared? Carlisle! How could you?

I could plainly hear his thoughts, already explaining, but my anger had gone out too far to try and listen to him. The same words came out of his mouth, now, and I looked away in a haze of red. Emmett, Rosalie, and I had just gotten back from a hunting trip – like she had mentioned – and truly, I could not blame her reaction.

Esme stood behind Carlisle, her expression worried, but still concerned as her thoughts drifted to the now dead girl upstairs. My nostrils flared again, and I could sense her, even though she stood completely still, not breathing, in what seemed like one of the guest rooms. I had yet to see her, but I didn’t want to.

Alice was standing on the other side of Carlisle, her expression defiant, her thoughts blocked. In this scenario, I would have expected her to be shouting at me through her thoughts, but she kept them strangely blank, thinking instead about the few times she had gone to see the dead girl. The thought infuriated me, the way the two women seemed to care for her. Why in Hell was she here in the first place? Through Alice’s thoughts, I could see clear memory of when Alice had visited her, playing out in perfect sight like I was there myself. Only the mangled girl on the bed screamed, throwing her head back, only too aware of the non-existent fire...

Alice was hiding a vision from me, there was no doubt. She let out a slip, however – in that brief half-second, I could see the vision she was hiding. Alice stood, arm-in-arm with a girl – a vampire, obviously. The vision was shady – not to clear – but then both of them smiled, their faces lighting up. Friends. The other girl’s eyes glowed briefly, killing the suspicion that had been forming. They pulsed gently, blood red.Of course. The newborn. Obviously, she was on the defense. I turned to her, distantly wondering why my gaze was not shooting a red fiery flame.

Jasper stood behind her with a protective stance, glancing at me furtively. He had every right to do that, seeing as I was not too in control of myself. From the tenor of his thoughts, he neither hated nor cared for the girl that was now standing motionless in an upstairs room, his thoughts only on protecting his mate.

Carlisle was still talking, getting to a part of when he saw her. Apparently, the girl had fallen from a huge height, and had been lying in a pool of her own blood. As soon as he spoke of it, he thought of her, the image filling his mind. As he remembered her scent, a knot in my stomach formed and twisted uncomfortably, even though I had just hunted.

Abruptly, the tone of his ‘voice’ shifted, and his thoughts became hazy, blocking, as he started to think about one of his hospital patients. He, too, was blocking his mind, and his normal, speaking voice had taken a defensive quality. And what, was the particular reason?

“…because that is what I do. I save lives. She was dying.

“Better than condemning her to this life, Carlisle! She is worse than dead,” Rosalie seethed. Emmett hovered anxiously around her. He knew whose side to take in a fight was, but I could see that in his mind, he truly had no harsh feelings towards the girl.

Carlisle finished talking, and I had not been listening in the whole conversation. Rosalie stalked out of the house, no doubt going to take her anger out on her car’s engine. Emmett followed her hopelessly, trailing behind.

I had not listened because I didn’t care. Carlisle had done what he had done, and it was pointless grieving over it. What he had done could not—could never, be reversed. He had changed someone, even though he hadn’t for decades. What was the point, and why now? His thoughts had given no indication, no warning. I was angry – but not at him. I was horrifyingly angry at someone, though. It took me a small while to decide who.

At the girl.

Why had she decided to jump off a damn cliff and disrupt my useless existence? Even thought I had not even seen her yet, I knew from this point, I would hate her. It was a big deal – coming home and running into a wild newborn. Disrupting. Annoying.

I drifted to my piano, studiously ignoring Alice, Esme, and Carlisle. They were talking about the newborn in low voices, and I did not want to be part of it. I sat down, staring at the ivory keys unfathomably. I knew my reaction was perhaps overwhelming, and slightly shameful, but I didn’t care. I would hate this girl. Perhaps leave if I had to, seeing as I had no patience to deal with the mood swings and undeniably frenzied thirst of a newborn. And the others would shove her towards me when they were bored.

I did not want to meet this newly created vampire, another monster in the world. That was what she was. A monster.

I clenched my fists and laid them lightly over the piano keys, and even my severe mood wasn’t enough to accidentally destroy it. I was particularly fond of this one.

I continued to seethe with hatred, even though there was no proper reason; that I was overreacting. But I was reminded of myself. The crazed monster that I had been when I changed. My rebellious stage. I had seen through Carlisle’s mind that the girl had been no more than seventeen or eighteen herself. Why couldn’t she have just died normally like she was supposed to? Another soul that had been snatched. It was possible that she could have fallen off the cliff. Or she could have jumped, wanting to end her life. I couldn’t care, but she would be angry. Of course. Very angry. And the question was that would her newborn strength overcome Emmett’s and Jaspers, because I certainly wasn’t going to help...

She wasn’t my problem. Or maybe she was.

I continued to remember my days, and I was swallowed momentarily in self-hate, hate for the girl, hate for everything around me. Of course, not my family members – they were what made eternity… enjoyable, sometimes.

But this girl…

A tiny prickle of guilt ran through my hate without warning. A tiny prickle. Knowing that one more life had been taken, one more soul destroyed… This girl could have possibly been repaired, had a chance to live out a normal life. Her injuries couldn’t have been as bad as Carlisle said. But no. She had been condemned to this life as well. No…

I had been wallowing so deep in my thoughts that I did not here the upcoming noise.

A pair of feet shuffled nervously into the living room, the scent around them unfamiliar.

I froze.

I heard the others – Alice, Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme – stiffen as well. I heard a nervous intake of breath, its exhale blowing another gust of unfamiliar scent in my direction.

Why? Why now? Why me?

Completely irrational, completly unlike me, to be thinking vainly of only myself, but I couldn't help it. It would be more taxing on Jasper, though – but perhaps he'd feel more relaxed, now that he wasn't the weakest link in the family.

I flinched. This girl was not family.

The breath was followed by a voice, wind-chime like, but I was not fooled. “H-hello?” the voice stuttered.

I turned slowly, feeling my body go rigid with once again, anger.

The first things that I saw were the eyes. Blood-red eyes, framed by a deathly pale heart-shaped face. A face that I could not—would not care for. I didn't care.

Without looking in any direction, especially her, I walked out briskly, feeling the girl's eyes on my back. I ran into the forest, watching the ground fly by under my feet as the red haze of familiar fury took over, once more.