For you, My Love
Their love was clearly invincible. Nothing could ever come between them, not even death. So, what happens when one day, Edward learns that no matter what he does, he cannot save her. Edward's POV.
1. For You, My Love
Rating 5/5 Word Count 3237 Review this Chapter
For you, My Love
They were staring at me with those ruby red eyes of theirs, waiting for my answer. As if a simple answer from me would justify what I was asking them to do. As if a simple answer from me could explain something so profound even I couldn't understand it. That idea alone was so completely absurd, I almost scoffed at them. But that would have been a mistake.
Would it have been? If I gave them such a derogatory offense as scoffing, would Aro feel the need to give Felix that nod? That was what I wanted. Just a nod and a quick death. I wouldn't even care if it'd be painful; the physical pain would be nothing compared to the war raging on inside. Inside my heart? No, I had no heart. It was dead. It had died the second she left me, the second before those beautiful eyes - eyes that had been slowly transitioning from a dull red to a sparkling topaz - caught mine and everything went black.
No, I didn't want to give them an answer. What I wanted to do was run outside this godforsaken building, burst out into the brilliant sun slowly rising over the horizon, and stretch my arms out welcoming the blinding rays. Maybe climb to the very tip of the tallest building in this godforsaken city and swan dive into the unsuspecting crowd below me. But my energy was gone. It made sense, too. It took a lot out of someone to run from Paris to Volterra. Even if that someone was a vampire.
I stared back at the void faces in front of me. What was I going to tell them? What did they want to know? Identical pasty faces with identical blood-stained lips remained unmoving, fixing bloodshot, hungry eyes at me.
Aro smiled and carefully folded those long fingers together slowly, deliberately, a show of power in a delicate twist of a movement. I looked at those hands and clenched my own, wishing I could command those hands to rip apart my body. Bella could have, I thought absently. It was her gift; she sent thoughts to people's minds and depending on their will power, they would carry out her thoughts.
I almost smiled. It was a game we played whenever she was talking to people across the room and I was trapped on the other end, dozens of bodies away from her. She would glance over and send me a message.
I love you, she'd smile as her mouth moved, entertaining the people around her. I'd mouth the words back to her.
Once, when we were in the Vatican, touring the Sistine Chapel, she'd pushed the game to another level. She had been holding my hand, silently walking the length of the room with her head craned upward, taking in Michelangelo's intricate paintings, when suddenly, a thought crept unbidden into my mind, louder than all the others around me. Edward… I heard her as clearly as if she'd been speaking out loud. One glance at her upturned mouth told me she was about to start a game.
Edward, are you staring at that naked woman? I stared at her, eyes wide with shock. That little… she was teasing me. She kept her face turned up and kept walking as if nothing had happened.
I had caught her in my arms then and whispered in her ear, "Why, you little…"
Shh, no talking, her mind sang out, it's against the rules. She stepped out of my arms - too easily, as I might add. One of the things I liked best about her when she was human. I could trap her and keep her so easily… a dreamy smile must have clouded my face.
I don't like that expression, she chastised, sending me a little glare. It either means you're thinking about the past… or thinking about things that would be inappropriate in such company as we're in now. She gestured to the walls, It's a chapel, you know.
The guilty look on my face gave me away, but she just smirked, concentrated for a few seconds - she hadn't completely mastered her ability yet to send detailed images - and suddenly, I was assaulted with a picture of her, slowly undressing in the airplane bathroom … as she'd done on the way to Italy.
"Oh, I'm going to get you," I swore, trying to control my natural reaction.
Please do, she had grinned. I'll be waiting… and with that, she ran out of the room. When I found her a few minutes later, it was in the woman's room of the Vatican, and we did more than think those inappropriate thoughts. We carried them out nicely, too.Bella…
It hurt me to think about her, now. Oh Bella, I tried to reach her, but she couldn't hear me. Wherever she was, she couldn't respond. I remembered her beautiful face and even more beautiful heart. It hadn't even been an entire year since I changed her and now, she was gone forever.
Who's fault was it? I spent days rotting in that hotel room we had stayed at in Paris, smelling the bed sheets, inhaling her sweet scent that still lingered as I contemplated revenge. Revenge on the one who'd taken her from me - but I couldn't. He was already dead. Death by his own hands as he was interrogated by the government. It was what he was trained to do if ever caught and he had done it, snatching away my hunger for destruction and leaving me unsatisfied.
It was her damned heart… her damned kindness. She was the best of all of us, maybe even better than Carlisle. The thirst for human blood had hit her just as hard as it had hit every one of us, but she'd been strong enough to resist it after just a month. I asked her how she did it, and she told me that she imagined the lives the people had and the life they had yet to live.
"How can I take that away?" she had whispered, touching my face. "Just because I'm a little bit thirsty, … I couldn't ever do that."
It was Bella who suggested that we leave Forks and not cause the werewolves any trouble. Bella, who still remembered her best friend, Jacob, even as he turned away from her in disgust when he first saw her as a vampire. She had told us there was nothing holding us down and why couldn't we just leave? So we did.
After a month or so in Denali, I decided to take her traveling and she absolutely loved it. We visited the pyramids in Egypt, the Great Wall of China, St. Basils cathedral in Russia; everywhere she went, she touched with her laughter, her kindness, her light…Bella…
Aro was still looking at me, patiently waiting a response. I could let him touch me and let him see the memories, those precious memories… And all the same, I couldn't. If I did, they'd be tainted. The moments we shared were precious and for us only. Not for anybody else to see. Bella wouldn't have liked that.
I remembered our first time together. After being careful around her fragile, human frame for so long, it had been hard to break the habit. It was in Denali when she finally decided that she had finally had enough of my gentle touches and cautious advances. She had led me into the woods until we were secluded in a small clearing, surrounded by trees. Snow was frosted on the dead, brown grass and layered along the branches of the trees, glistening under the sunlight just as brightly as our skin.
"I'm not a doll!" she had hissed furiously as I hung back. She was glorious when she was angry. "I won't break! Stop treating me like I will!"
Traces of her old, human blood had coursed through her body, making her blush red. It wasn't as strong as it was when she was human, but still, the color tainting her cheeks made me step forward. She had growled at me when I moved to caress her face and yanked my hand forward until it was pressed against her throat. For a second, I stood still, surprised beyond belief, then she slowly slid my hand down, traveling between the valley of her breasts, to her hard, flat stomach, to the buttons of her jeans.
"Bella…" I remembered breathing heavily, trying to control myself.
Stop! Her mind screamed at me. She glared. "Don't control yourself," she nearly snarled at me. "Just take what you want. All I've ever had was your control. I want your passion."
With her words as my catalyst, I hooked a finger in the belt loop of her jeans and pulled her flush against me. If her heart had been able to beat, it would've been in a frenzy. I kissed her, hard, a brief three seconds of my lips on hers. When I pulled back, her eyes were hooded and her breathing was heavy.
Then, I kissed her again, lovingly and languidly, tasting her for the first time. I wasn't sure where to put my hands, so I gripped her waist, sliding my hands up until it touched the side of her breasts. Her arms reached around my head and pulled me close, her hands buried themselves in my hair. I nearly died when I felt her tongue slide against my lower lip, seeking the entrance that I've always prohibited. And I gave into her.
Why, God why, had I always stopped her? There was nothing like this. Nothing. Her lips and tongue were cold, but I felt like I was on fire. She tasted sweet, her tongue mingling with mine, our lips dancing, teeth clashing every so often. I barely noticed it when she fell back to the ground, lying on her back and pulling me on top of her.
"I love you," she had whispered into my ear and kissed right under it. Then she kissed along my jawline until she reached my mouth again. "I need you. I want you."
"Bella…" I had breathed out.
The entire afternoon had been spent there in that clearing exploring each other's bodies as we've never done before. I remembered the feel of her smooth skin under my palm as I slid her shirt off, remembered the way I shivered uncontrollably as she slipped a nimble hand under my pants, remembered how she pressed the length of her body against me as I took her again and again. I remembered wanting more after my first taste of her, how I kept wanting more as she kept giving more, kept needing to feel her slender curves moving against my body. And the sounds. The erotic, beautiful, loving words mixed in with pants and heated moans coming from both of us.
No, it wasn't a memory I was willing to share. Bella, I wanted to cry out as I looked lifelessly into Aro's face. He wasn't asking me to give him my hand and that in itself was an act of mercy.
Caius cleared his throat, impatiently, and the grating sound spurred my anger. Things to attend to, People to eat, I heard his thoughts clearly. For a moment, I wondered how he could be so flippant when I was standing here before him, asking for my life to end. How could anybody be happy when I just lost my reason for living, my light, my Bella.
The dull pain thudded in my chest again and I felt pressure where my heart should be. Bella, Bella, Bella, I chanted her name in my head, wishing I could take the entire week back. I'd give back anything just so she could stand there next to me, solid and living. Living. Live, Edward, for me. Please promise you'll …
It was the last thought she'd transmitted to me.
The last thought she had before…
I fell to my knees and grasped my head in my hands, trying to force back that memory. That one, last fateful memory. It shouted in my head, made me throb and shake, made me wish I had the ability to sleep, eternally.
"Bella," I spoke her name and hated my voice. I looked over at Jane, sitting next to Marcus and Alec with a gleeful expression on her face. This pain, it was worse than anything she could ever inflict on me and she knew it.
"Ah, of course," Aro was smiling and I hated it, hated him. I hated the knowing, faux sympathetic inflection of his tone. "So much talent, so much potential. If only she had the time to develop her gift."
He sighed. Pity, he thought, She would've been magnificent as one of us. You knew that, Edward. I muted his voice in my head, hating how he knew I was listening. Hated how he knew what buttons to press.
"Yes," I growled, trying to control myself. It wouldn't do any good to try and attack him here in his own court. "Pity."
"Would you be kind enough to tell us how she … died?" His smile was unforgiving.
And it brought me back to the memory I was trying so hard to repress…
We had been in Paris. Bella loved Paris, so she told me time and time again. She loved the architecture, the atmosphere, the romantic ambiance.
"City of lovers," she had giggled in my ear as we walked over a bridge. "Isn't it perfect? You, me, and Paris. It has definite potential."
God, her voice.
Most of all, she loved the lights. She loved the way they shone at night and how they made those glittery, ethereal reflections across the river. We made love on the balcony of our hotel the first night. She told me she could see the Eiffel Tower from where she was and I told her all I could see was her face. She laughed and asked me if I could see the tower reflected in her eyes and I told her I hadn't noticed - I was too enthralled with her.
In Paris, I felt like I was actually seventeen again, not the hundred plus years I actually was. I fell in love with her all over again and this time, there was no Romeo or Juliet. This time, it was beautiful and sparkling new. It was like I finally learned how to use my wings and could let myself fly. There was nothing to hold back, no fear of accidentally snapping her neck, or hurting her with a careless movement.
An hour couldn't go by without the need to kiss her or touch her… One time, we had been riding on a ferry, listening to the tour guide talk about the different buildings, the history of everything, and all I could think about was how enticing she looked in that white, strapless dress that stopped a few inches shy of her knees. She had met my eye and with a wicked smile, led me to the far end of the boat, and when we were sure that nobody was looking, we dived off into the water together. Once submerged, she kissed me and I took her right there in the Seine River. We were laughing the entire time, reveling in this new experience, feeling completely scandalous as I held her close to me. Our movements were slower and a bit clumsy with the water moving against us, surrounding us, but it was beautiful all the same.
When we surfaced by the harbor, a few people threw us surprised and amused glances. We couldn't stop our laughter as we looked down at our dripping clothing.
"Edward, I'm see-through!" she had squealed and pressed herself against me. I chuckled until I heard the thoughts of a few men walking past us who had let their eyes linger on her body a little longer than what was appropriate. When I growled, they hurried off, tearing their gazes away from her.
"You're gorgeous," I told her and pressed a kiss into her soaked hair.
It was the happiest moment of my life and I didn't even notice the thoughts of anybody else in the entire city as I walked back to the hotel with her.
Maybe if I had, she would still be with me.
That morning - that simple, insignificant morning - had started off like the rest. We had spent all night in our hotel room, loving each other, nearly breaking the bed, and were getting ready to explore the city one last time before we flew back to Denali to meet up with Carlisle and Esme.
We walked out into the cloudy day, hand in hand, when suddenly, she froze, staring out into the middle of the square. It was then when the thoughts of a man dressed in a black suit hit me.
In ten seconds, you all will die.
It took less than that for Bella to rush out into the square and grab the suitcase the man was carrying. The man shouted and tried to grab it back, but Bella snatched it away easily, then held it in her arms, staring at it frantically.
There's a bomb in there… the girl is going to blow up, the man was thinking before he ran away.
I remembered standing there, frozen, as Bella's eyes moved to meet mine. There was no time left and slowly, she tucked the briefcase close against her chest and bent down. I remembered shouting at her to stop, telling my legs to get moving, trying to make my way towards her.
Her head raised and her eyes met mine, full of love, sorrow, but mostly focusing on sending me one last thought.Stop! I love you. So much. Live, Edward, for me. Please promise you'll…
And the bomb went off.
A bomb was all it took to blow her body up. It wasn't a big explosion; her body prevented that. Nobody else got hurt. Many people didn't even notice until they saw the flames of her broken body scattered across the square. Most people gasped, but all I could do was fall to the ground.
She was gone. Just like that.
And just like that, I stared at Aro and shook my head. Then I walked away from him. Let him stop me if he wants to, I thought to myself and Bella. I'm going to live for you, my love.