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Blind

Summary:
This is Recklessness in Edward's POV; it's quite a bit longer and has some extra scenes in it that are not in Bella's POV. As always though, it's a lot more interesting.


Notes:


2. Chapter 2: Stubborn

Rating 0/5   Word Count 1638   Review this Chapter

After a moment, Bella said, " So, you want to explain what just happened back there?"

"What--are you talking about?" I asked, confused.

"I have to be honest; this doesn't seem like we're ditching for pleasantries.

Why couldn't she just let stuff go? Why was she so damn persistent? I sighed, impatiently, "Drop it, Bella."

"No," she scoffed, "I thought we were past all the secrecy. Why can't you tell me?"

I didn't answer, knowing exactly what she would want to do, which was exactly what she shouldn't do.

Even though I was staring ahead, I could tell she rolled her eyes, as she said, "You are SUCH a jerk!"

I grimaced and gave in, knowing she wouldn't stop until I told her. "Fine, I'll tell you, but you have to promise you won't do anything Bella-like."

"What is that supposed to mean?" She asked, irritably.

"Emmett has been trying to get me to bring you over. He wants to meet you at our house. He wants you to come by later and watch a movie."

She shrugged, "That doesn't seem so bad--"

"Don't even think about it!" I said, firmly. Her apparent death wish was so irritating. Why did she insist on walking right into the arms of trouble?

"Why not?"

"You're not ready to meet them, Bella."

"I would love to meet your family."

I glared out the window, angrily, "Not. Yet."

"Has anyone ever told you what a stubborn ass you are?" She asked, irritably.

I couldn't help but snort at her bluntness, "Yes, I've been told that a time or two." Mainly from Rosalie, but I stopped listening to her decades ago.

"Over a hundred years and you only get told that once or twice? I don't buy that."

I smirked and said, in a feigned conceited tone, "Well, thank you, I'm quite proud of it."

As if triggering some unknown bomb to go off, she scoffed again, "Edward, please. I can do this. I want to meet them. Please?"

"I can't do this," I protested.

"Well, this isn't about your capabilities; it's about mine and I can do this."

She would never understand. She didn't want to understand. What the hell was the matter with her? "Can you?" I challenged, "Bella, you have no idea what you're risking."

"What, my life?" She asked, almost carelessly, as if it meant nothing to her. "Hah! Come on, I risk it by hanging out with you, don't I; what's the difference?"

"That's not funny, Bella!" How dare she throw that in my face?! Didn't she realize how insanely, ridiculously absurd she was being?

"I'm not laughing!" She protested, childishly.

"The difference is I have a lot more motive than they do to control myself. Can they do it; sure, most likely. But, I cannot put your life on the line for 'most likely'; that's not good enough."

"I trust you and your family. I have no doubt that it will all be fine." She protested, stubbornly, "Besides, what the hell more motive could you have that they don't?!"

I couldn't help but flinch at those words, which pierced my dead heart as if it were truly still alive. As if she really didn't know. How could she not realize that I was desperately, pathetically in love with her?

"Let it go, Bella," I managed to say, surprisingly well, considering the fact that I was trying not to show her houw much I did love her.

"No! I'm not doing this anymore!"

She was so hellbent on running full speed, head on right into the devil's lair. Nothing could stop her; not even me. With all my powers and utter determination to keep her safe, there was nothing I could do. Besides, Carlisle would be there if things got out of control. Worst case scenario: I take her home sooner.

But, still...how could I even be considering this? How could I allow her to put her life at risk here? How could I be trying to justify this to myself? I couldn't let her do this. If something did go wrong, I would never, ever forgive myself.

In my whole life, I had never found anything I had wanted to own so completely. Something I wanted to be just mine and mine alone. Until I met her. She was the only thing I had ever wanted. She's all I would ever need to survive. I loved her...She was...my Bella.

'EDWARD!' Emmett's voice yelled in my head, causing me to put my hand to my head, close my eyes, and shake my head. 'Come on, Edward! It'll be fine; I promise, nothing will happen. Please...I wanna meet her. Stop being a brat! If you don't bring her to me, you know I'll go to her...' He threatened, causing me to snarl under my breath, low enough so she couldn't hear. This was terrible.

I sighed, again so she couldn't hear me and internally kicked myself for doing this. I forced myself to look at her and tried desperately to hide the pain and anger from my features, but it was clear from her expression that I was failing miserably.

I nodded once, "Okay...fine, but one condition."

"What?" She asked, hesitantly.

"You will stay by my side the entire time and do exactly as I tell you." I was involuntarily thrilled by that thought. The thought of having her by my side forever was so...beautiful and...perfect.

DON'T go there, I silently scolded myself. How dare I have such monstrous thought about such a remarkable creature?

She laughed slightly before saying, before saying, "Deal...thank you...so much.

My jaw tightened and self-loathing practically boiled over and I wished that I could just die so she could live a happy, normal life with someone who deserved her. No one deserved her...not really. But, I was the worst option possible for her. I knew that, yet I couldn't bring myself to care.

I forced myself to nod in acknowledgement before speeding up to ease some of my tension and anger; to not take it out on her.

Once we got to her house, I waited in the car while she went to go change. I swear, I could KILL Newton and that idiot Yorkie for what they did to her.

When she came back out, I couldn't help but try to sway her again. I sighed, "You sure you know what you're doing?"

"I think I can handle it." She had no idea what she was getting herself into. She couldn't. I was tired of arguing with her, so I didn't answer as I backed out of the driveway.

I couldn't dissuade her, but I could make strict guidelines. "Okay, here's the deal: you go, you meet them, we watch the movie, I bring you back. Otherwise, no deal."

"I can't just--"

"No! I'm risking too much already. Don't argue or else no deal."

She looked frustrated, like she wanted desperately to argue further, but like me, didn't have the will for it.

She eventually turned and glared angrily out the window, clearly avoiding me unless necessary. I couldn't help but find that amusing.

After a moment, I felt kind of bad, so I sighed softly and said, "Bella, I'm sorry...but you don't understand how hard this is for me, knowing what is at stake here."

"And what is at stake here?!" She demanded, jerking her head towards me. How could she ask me that? Just cause I wasn't acting like a brat didn't mean I didn't care.

I simply stared ahead and my lips twitched slightly as I fought back a retort, trying to remain calm. "How could you ask me that?" I whispered my thoughts out loud, hopefully soft enough that she couldn't hear it, but I couldn't help it.

When would she see just what she meant to me? She was so damn frustrating sometimes. I jerked my head towards her and said, "What do I have to do to show you what you mean to me?! Bella, you...mean so much more to me than anyone has ever had the power to. Do you not get that?!"

She was clearly struggling to breathe as she took that in. At this moment, I would happily have given my life to know what she was thinking. I hated not knowing. I had never wanted anything more.

"Sorry..." she said, in a small voice, "I didn't...know. I--"

"Yeah, you're damn right you didn't know!" I snapped, hearing the false apology, causing her to wince. "You can't know. No one can know. But, that's not why I'm so upset. You refuse to accept it. I have done everything from save your life to being a friend and none of it's good enough for you. It's not enough to make you see."

"Make me see what?!"

"To make you see that I--" Love you, I finished in my head. I couldn't tell her that; not now. She deserved better than that. I hung my head, ashamed.

"You what?" She asked, softly.

I screeched a stop and shook my head, fiercely, "Nothing; it doesn't matter. We're here."

"Edward, I--"

"Don't." I looked at her, "Just...don't."

She had nothing to apologize for; I wouldn't let her do it. I gout out and opened her door for her, not giving her a chance to say sorry.