Can Broken Hearts Heal?
Alice didn’t see it. Victoria did. 37 years later and Bella still can’t control the pain
Bella jumped off the cliff, but Alice didn't 'see' it in time. Meanwhile Victoria takes full advantage. After 37 years, what happens when trouble is all reunited?
10. IX ~ Secrets among Many
Rating 4.5/5 Word Count 3548 Review this Chapter
I ran back to the house quickly and silently on the roads. No one passed me in their cars, and it was good to be alone again. Being alone was like being free to me. But before long, I was back to my usual ponderings of the past. I wanted to be removed from the shackles of the times before, but I couldn’t let go.
It infuriated me, and the next thing I knew, a shiny dent had mad its appearance on a passing road sign. I stopped, looking at the indentation I had made in the think metal sheet.
“Bugger.” I whispered. Then cursed myself for using Axel’s own cursing words. He was as annoying as they came.
I sat down on the edge of the curve, comfortable on the ground human’s wouldn’t have been. I sighed. Human life had been so petty. So worthless on my half. My twin sister was arrogant and always the one to get there first, to be the prettiest, to be the loudest, the most wanted. The frustration I balled in on myself was mainly from her in the first place. It collected itself.
Unlike the others I remembered all my human life, however distant.
Twins, Crassirey (Cra-sear-ree) and I, a mother who could only afford to bring up one of us perfectly, but she’d tried anyway. We’d been opposites, my sister and I, she being blonde haired, falling in waves to her back, her overly small nose and a pointy mouth. She reminded me of that blonde in the other Coven’s house. Blonde, pretty, shallow. I’d been the mousey, silent one, sitting in the backgrounds. By the age of 13 I was still small and not chesty and weak.
At 15 I’d taken it into my own hands. I snapped one night, after Crassirey had been yelling at our mother about some boy. I just stormed out the house to the gym. The following months concluded of me running out the house whenever I felt the frustration of not being enough building up so strong. I’d built my muscles. I’d learnt how to punch, kick, attack. I’d trained on my balance, my stamina, my techniques, and the way I stood.
I’d had my growth spurt, gaining height over my sister. I was tall, perhaps elegant, and silent still, but I wasn’t so…built up inside me. Punching and kicking were the ways out of that torment.
Our mother was always betting after I changed to be able to attack. Perhaps the shock of it?-I was never sure; I never got along with people. She went to an illegal fighting arena, staged bellow ground. Needless to say, I joined to try and test myself against those other fighters. But I’d been caught out when they realised my mother was betting and I was continuously the ‘nights main fight’. I’d been forced into matches when they’d taken our mother into kidnapping, trying to let her be free. The mother who I didn’t care for, I still had to fight to keep her safe!
I was trapped, and I remember having been forced into the matches night after night, to try and gain my freedom from the place. ‘Only a few more fights until we’ll let you go’ but they never did.
Then, I remembered the pain. The night of my 21st birthday. I’d seen her. I’d been…I could barely remember what I’d been doing to end up in that state. I’d been fighting, punching and kicking, but something had gone wrong. I’d been regaining my breath after I’d knocked the guy down but then…someone from the crowds had jumped behind me, scared the hell out of me, and the man I’d just knocked, got up too. No one stopped them, they thought it was all acted. But the men beat me together. I’d been lying on the floor…swimming in my own pain and blood when…Melanie. She’d rescued me, given me a clean life.
But the pain…the pain she’d given me was far, far worse than the beatings from my six years of fighting in the boxes. I came back to reality with a thud, slamming my fist as an mechanical reaction to any pain. The pavement cracked.
“I’m not strong enough!” I stood up the moment I thought about it. I was never strong enough. I should have been stronger. I’d screamed when I’d been changing to the immortal life. I’d screamed and kissed and even cried. Cried like when I’d been 13 and helpless!
I didn’t stay around any longer. I didn’t want to reflect on anymore. The years I had escaped from had haunted me in the last twenty years of staying at twenty one as an immortal. I would have been forty-one this year, and still I would have been helpless.
I ran to our door, still broken from Melanie. I waited another second before climbing into the house. Something was wrong. Melanie had secrets, like I had kept from the others, but now they…something had triggered in her. I didn’t know anything about her human life. She hadn’t told anyone of us, and yet…I trusted her more than Axel or Sami. Talking of whom…
“Hey Ray.” Sami called in from the other room. “Where did you go? You just ran off without us.”
There was silence, as we both sat quietly in our room. No doubt Melanie was upstairs in her room. I listened to see if she was planning on jumping out the window, but her even breathing was the only sound. I imagined her lying on the sheets asleep for a second, but dismissed it. That was human like; imagining things. I was not human.
“Axel’s out repairing Mel’s car. She wrecked the suspension apparently, but it’s just the same. I think he just wants something to do. You going out to see Silph later?”
I didn’t like this small talk.
Sami finally sighed heavily after four minutes and nineteen seconds, each one of them counted by her eyes on the clock. I only noticed as I stared at it too.
“I don’t like this.” She muttered.
I waited for her to explain. She had the gift at making everything go slowly didn’t she?
“Look, Ray, I know we don’t talk much, and this is awkward for me too, but tonight…I felt something different. Mel’s definitely different. Those Cullen’s have something different. I mean.” She lowered her voice even quieter, and I had to strain to lip reading. “Did you see how they all looked dead? In their eyes. Just like Mel does when she thinks we’re not looking?”
“Yes.”“And I don’t think times going to heal whatever they’ve gone through. Although they looked deader than most, I just know that they want to let go and be free.” Here she looked directly at me. Her words danced in my head ‘let go and be free’.
“So you’re saying something happened to them, like what happened to Melanie?”
“And I think you know of all people how detached people can get. You and Silphese.” I didn’t like where she was going. She knew something. My anger flickered inside me. She knew something about me, which she shouldn’t. She lent towards me and I stiffened. If she knew anything I’d-
She took my hands over the table in front of us. Just a simple action. It felt so strange. I didn’t go well with people, and I hadn’t hand my hands held in…in a while by anyone.
“I want to try something. I’ve tried with everyone spare you and Silphese. Even Viro and Nathan.”
“What.” I asked quickly.
“My power is to slow time, but I’ve never managed to do so with another person. Never. I want to see…if contact makes it easier to shift it, if I can bring another vampire with me. If I can just do something…more with it! It’s so helpless with something that’s so…reliable only on me.”
“And you think that I’d let you even try! That I’d make a difference!” Our voices were back to stage whispering, and I though about dragging my hands out of hers. But I didn’t. My weakness to…help for the first time in my life kicked in.
Maybe I’d get answers.
She waited for me to move away, but I didn’t. “That I’d make a difference?” I repeated.
“Perhaps. I don’t know. But I want to try.”
“How will I know if…”
“It feels like wading in sand. Something’s trying to pull you back, tugging lightly, but you can carry on. You can drag it all out…But you can walk as fast as you like, as quickly as your actions are, it’s more like its pulling at your mind.”
I had no clue as to what those similes were going to feel like, but I waited silently, acute to my senses.
“First of, relax. I’ll tell you when we’re in, though I warn you…I can’t speak during the time we’re in. It’s like…the disadvantage. I’ve never been able to speak in slow time.”
I stayed still.
“Relax. You’re hunching over like ‘there’s a stick up your ass’ as Axel would say” We both scowled at his sense of humour, but it was more in a bonding way. I lowered my shoulders, feeling incredibly exposed and venerable. I closed my eyes and sank onto the sofa. Relaxing…
“How did you know?” I came back into my stance of tightened shoulders. “I was only gone for a second!”
“Because your eyes closed at about 100 times slower than they should have if you were with me in the lengthened space. Right now; I want you to get…feel a strong emotion, hate, jealousy, happiness, anger. Which ever one you rely on the most.”“One moment.” I held up a finger, my other hand still linked with hers. “When you stop time-”
“I do not stop time. I make it slower to the beholder”
“Oh.” I frowned. “Okay- angry.” I snapped back into my seat, and flicked through the worst memories, the feeling of furry, the helplessness that I was made of. My hands balled into fists slowly. But then there was a shock down my body, and I stood fast to my feet, plunging my fist into the glass table. It shattered and fell to the floor.
Sami looked up at me astounded.
“And here was me thinking that wouldn’t have worked.”
“It didn’t. I just smashed the table to specks for nothing in less than two seconds.”
“But before that. You’re hand. It took longer than I should have to move.”
I paused from marching out the room. “Maybe.” Then I carried on walking.
I bent forwards, picking up the glass from the floor. Her hand had definitely taken longer to clench. There hadn’t been the pull of time around it. I had felt the pull of the earth around it. I grinned as I began the tedious task of clearing up. It had worked, if for only a moment, a tiny fraction, but it had worked!
I happily walked to the bin with the fragments of glass and deposited them there. Now, eight hours left until school…what to do? I stared at the clock again, something of a habit. Rayché had been definitely different with me just then. We’d never really connected before. Maybe it was that cool distance that had let me drag her in my own time that made it work in the first place?
Yes, definitely different towards me. Was that a good thing? Ray always had secrets and a hidden past and feelings. Spare anger. She had plenty to spare on that. I was always…curious as to why. I felt everyone in this house had secrets from me. And as much as I tried not to pry and poke, it was increasingly harder. Axel, I think, was the only completely honest person. Him and Mel. I trusted them. Silph and Ray…I didn’t really know much about them.
And then when we had Viro with us anyway. I sighed again. Viro had been fun. I’d trusted her. We’d been closer than sisters in this new life after all! Her purple plaited hair and my own bright orange, she always smaller, cuter than I. but then…Nathan and his badly dyed green hair. I scowled a damper on my happy mood.
“Hey Sam!” Axel called through from the hallway. “I’ve barred up the door and locked the garage down…you want to…come outside with me for a moment. I want something to show you”So maybe he did have secrets from me. But he’d told me about his past and what he wanted for his future too. There weren’t big holes in what I knew about him.
I walked out the door, huge strips of wood hammered neatly to the outside, which made me scow, then brighten at the thought of door hunting. Mel would disapprove of the money being used, but we had enough. More than enough for most things.
“Up here.” I span around, trying to work out where he was.
“Where?” I hissed into the darkness. A hand found my own, surprising me so much I jumped. He laughed quietly beside me.
“Jump” I bent my legs and jumped into the air, dragged to the house. I was worried we were going to hit a window but then-
“Surprise. Meet Axel’s secret hiding place.” He grinned at me in the darkness. We’d jumped to be on top of the garage roof, hidden in shadow and still able to look out on the streets at the silent lamps emitting the only artificial light other than the ones in the home. It was oddly beautiful, watching that eighth colour brighten through the dusty bulbs of the lamps.
“It’s really beautiful up here.” I felt his gaze linger on me before he looked away.
“Those street lights are beautiful sometimes, you know.” I told him, not really meaning it. He was strange to think it was-
“I was talking about the stars”
He waited patiently for a few moments before speaking again. “What d’you think of this other coven then? The infamous Cullen’s.”
“I overheard someone talking about them once. You know…Viro and Nathan. About how this one woman was after the ‘largest veggie vamp coven’. The Cullen’s are the largest coven of animal eaters.”
“Oh.” I was reeeaaal intelligent tonight.
“I think that…hmm. Well, I was just talking to Rayché about them.”
“Oh. You mean about.” He pointed towards the house, trying to make it obvious that it was Melanie.
“A bit.” I was going to start talking again, but I was sure Mel would be listening in on us. “So, err…what’s this place all about?” I patted the roof meaningfully.
“Just somewhere I decided to sit down on. It was lucky. Rayché doesn’t know about it, so when she’s in a bad mood, guess where I hide?” He winked at me.
“The same way you hide from me when I tell you to clean your room?” I remarked.
“Err…I’m going to need to find a new hiding place now…” He ran a hand through his spiky hair, which annoyed me greatly, for some unknown reason.
“You bet cha’!”
He silently stood up beside me after that, stretching needlessly. “I need to go and find Rayché and get a good fight in before school. I hope that Edward guy got back to Carlisle and Esme. They seemed real worried ‘bout him.”
“I think Ray’s out with Silphese tonight.”
“Damn. Maybe that guy Emmett then.” He nimbly jumped from the building. “Need a hand my lady?” He called from the ground.
“Thanks Axel, but I’m waiting for a nice man to come and help me.” I grinned.
“And I am not?”
“Oh stop that British accent and let’s go inside.” I shivered as if I was cold. Something was up, and no matter how much I tried, I couldn’t shake off the feeling that it was going to come crashing down on all of us pretty soon.
“You never did ask me which side of the ocean I came from” He smirked up at me. I glared back.
“Axel Cowan-Mathews! Get back here right now!” I jumped from the building in time to be hanging from mid-air, while Axel lazily walked beside me to the house. “I’ll leave you there until morning shall I?” I waited for him to break eye contact with me, before able to continue jumping to the ground and chasing him inside. That damn telekinesis was the reason why I was going to let Rayché get him in the morning.
I rolled over once again on the bed. I just wanted my head to calm down! He was here…he was here and angry and…My brain wanted to carry on, off at a tangent. I growled inwardly and rolled over again. He’d run out of the room after that fight…and then that weird thing had happened with seeing all those colours…it was like a heat-sensing ray. Strange.
I lay restless again, listening to the silent night. It’d been silent until I’d crept into the Cullen’s house. I sighed, giving up at trying not remembering. No doubt the pain would just continue to stab straight after anyway, so might as well get the best of it. I closed my eyes and remembered his face. So close to mine. Even while fighting he’d been so beautiful.
I reached up to my neck, remembering the feel of his lips opening; his bare teeth against my granite hard skin. I flinched and closed my eyes in preparation towards the pain, but-
I paused, sliding my hand to over my heart. It wasn’t…wasn’t there. I frowned and sat up. What was going on? Why wasn’t I feeling the pain? It had hurt the last thirty-seven years of my existence, and no, when I’d seen him, touched him, why wasn’t it hurting even more?
“S-Sami?” I whispered. “Sami are you?” Had she slowed down the reaction? Maybe because he was here, I felt relieved…I wasn’t Bella anymore, so when he came along, now that he’d touched me I had gotten rid of the pain? No, I couldn’t think like that. It must’ve been Sami and her tricks. It had nothing to do with Edward. I flinched as a shot of pain rippled through my body, but even then, it was less than the normal level or torment. Perhaps a little, but my breathing picked up unnecessarily as I fell back on the bed. I gritted my teeth trying to keep my inner pain silent.
I was going to have to get away soon. Very soon. The pain finally let off and I struggled to control myself. Slowly I rose from my bed. I didn’t need to hunt, not for another week, but perhaps Axel wasn’t too busy. Or Sami. As I opened my door, it was in time to see Sami streak past me to shut her door loudly behind her. Axel sprinted up the stairs, and while ignoring me, started banging on the door.
“Sami, let me in now!”
“Oh, hey Melanie. Sami LET ME IN!”
I paused. “Why is your hair covered in glitter and…pink hair dye?”
He looked at me for a second. “SAMI LET ME IN THIS SECOND BEFORE I TAKE THIS DOOR DOWN! THIS BETTER NOT BE PERMINANT!”
I laughed, a real laugh. It was wonderful after all that pain.
Casually Sami opened the door an inch before slipping out of her room, Axel glaring at her. I didn’t like the look in his eye.
“Axel, I didn’t know you’d fall for it.”
“Fall for it! YOU CHANGED THE SHAMPOO IN THE BOTTLE!”
“Serves you right for not telling me you were British, ‘My lady’” She grinned. “Although pink suits you.”
I didn’t want to hang around any longer. But I had a feeling, if Sami didn’t get the paint and glitter out of his hair by the morning, Rayché was going to have the best day in her life.
I sat still, the water swirling around me. Nathan was out at the nearest village. I didn’t want to think about those women he was dragging in. Still…all that blood to devour.
I lay down relaxed, holding the air in my lungs so as not to breathe. My hair was soaked and the pretty purple colour was darker, a think blanket around me as I undid the bows for my plaits. The glasses in my pocket completed my…innocent look. I’m sure Rayché would have laughed if she still knew I used them.
Something in my line of vision distracted me somewhat.
I grinned as the murky water moved. No animals would be around. It had to be Nathan or…but she wasn’t meant to be around for the next two nights. I glanced up and saw the bright green streak of hair, swimming towards me. Nathan indeed. He signalled to me to come up to the surface, that emerald mane floating around his head. I wish he’d got it cut. Even if mine came down to my waist. My smiled broadened and I pushed from the floor. Supper was ready.
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