Can Broken Hearts Heal?
Alice didn’t see it. Victoria did. 37 years later and Bella still can’t control the pain
Bella jumped off the cliff, but Alice didn't 'see' it in time. Meanwhile Victoria takes full advantage. After 37 years, what happens when trouble is all reunited?
9. VIII ~ If you don?t try
Rating 5/5 Word Count 2574 Review this Chapter
I stared at the wall in my room. The same as yesterday. I scowled. That was, it had been the same until Emmett had forced me to ‘go to school and stop being such a twit’ as he had so kindly put it.
I balled my fists up against the soft carpet. And tried not to think. It was too hard not to as Alice’s thoughts invaded my mind.
We have guests.
I realised. The car pulling up the long driveway held four people. Although they sat silently, I could all their thoughts.
One, a male by the sound of his thoughts, was contemplating how his car had to have a new nickname. His mind drifted off to other aspects, and momentarily I saw a woman in his thoughts. He was thinking to fast to pick out much other than the untidily cut hair that framed her pretty face. The one next to him was female and staring out the window, thinking of…time. I frowned. Time was not important to me anymore.
It would take longer than time to mend any scars inside me.
The last two were shooting side glances at each other. One, male, was worried about someone called Melanie? The name rang bells in my head, but I didn’t try to remember. Nothing was worth remembering. The last female was very…closed. Her thoughts were confusing. Twice a picture of a violet-haired girl appeared in her mind along with another vampire.
I sighed heavily. I wouldn’t meet them. It was too much that I had been dragged to school.
Unconsciously, I clutched at the shirt, over where my dead heart lay. Buried for the rest of infinity. A sob managed to rob itself from my chest.
The door to my right opened slightly.
“Edward.” A soft voice talked to me. In the background I heard Esme and Carlisle welcoming the guests.
I didn’t reply and carried on staring at the wall opposite. The pale moonlight filtered down from the huge left window into the room, creating odd shadows across from me. I wanted to stay here. Be the monster I am and be punished for it.
“Edward, was school that bad for you?” Alice came over and sat down lightly next to me. I nodded once at her and carried on looking forwards.
“I didn’t see anything upsetting.” Alice tapped her head knowingly, and then patted my shoulder sympathetically. “Here.” She managed to relax my hand from clawing at my chest. “We’ll all be downstairs if you need anything”
As she left, closing the door silently behind her, I moved my eyes to outside. I stayed like that for several hours while the house’s members moved downstairs.
What I wouldn’t give for one more moment.
Something then grabbed my attention. A small…catching sound; barely audible over the talking that Emmett was booming about. I listened again, and definitely heard something outside Esme’s balcony. I sprang from my hunched position; the first time I had been actively interested in years…37 to be more precise, and walked as quietly as I could to Esme’s room.
Someone’s quiet breathe came from outside. Burglar? No- too quiet and no heartbeat for that matter. I opened the door quietly. A figure opened the glass doors from out on the balcony. Her hair was cut untidily and it looked dyed in the way that it had small brown patches showing on the crown of her head. Her pale skin glinted at the same time she turned her head to look into the room. I didn’t hesitate and instead sprang at the stranger.
As I pinned her against the wall, covering her mouth hastily, a new feeling arose in me. I didn’t even know what it was; and ignored it in time to catch her staring into my own eyes. An equally topaz gaze locked on my own, her expression caught between surprise and anger.
“Who are you, and why are you sneaking into our house?” I snarled at her. When she didn’t answer and continued to struggle, I pressed against her harder, my shoulder pinning her other arm to her side as she tried to flail her delicate limbs at me. Delicate? No- she was a vampire; looks were all for deceiving as I knew only to well.
She caught me off guard, her leg kicking up at the wrong time and I staggered backwards. A ferocious snarl caught on my tongue as I straightened and watched her scan down me. I raced towards her; instincts and nature bullying me to get rid of this dissimilar foreigner. Throwing out my hand I managed to slam her back into the wall, through the cement to the next wall.
“What’s going on?” A small voice echoed from the door way. I saw myself through Alice’s eyes, pinning this woman to the wall.
“Who are you?” I hissed. If she did not tell me immediately…I opened by jaw and moved to her throat, waiting for an answer. When she didn’t, I breathed silently and leaned in further, my teeth against her granite skin. She would tell me…
I sniffed deeply, trying to see if she was familiar; despite never seeing this vampire before-
I had seen her before. At the school. When Emmett had been tackling me into the cursed Biology lesson.
More importantly…her scent filled my head. Sweet; a calling almost.
I took at step back, frozen and yet wanting to run from the room as fast as I could get. Her dark hair, pale skin, and large eyes that told me; no matter how she tried to hide it, exactly how she felt.
Those eyes stared at my own; confusion to why I hadn’t killed her. Why had I paused, why had I wanted to kill her? Why had my emotions been tested so violently?
I walked back four steps, still gazing on the woman; Melanie I guessed.
Then I ran.
I didn’t care if I never came back; I didn’t want to ever remember. I was designed to suffer like this and be tortured, but I couldn’t cope with the pain rippling through me. I sped out into the hall way, opening the door and then leaving it wide open as I ran from the house. Carlisle had been the first to notice; and even as his thoughts drifted further away; I knew it was wrong to do this. Leave them with so much worry. But I didn’t want to come back- I wouldn’t go back. Not to that vampire.
Not for anyone anymore.
I didn’t know where I was, but forest surrounded me as I fell to my knees. I couldn’t leave my family. They were all that I had left. I couldn’t hear anything but the dry sobs that ripped through my body as I sat on the grass, shuddering at the pain. It was too much. Even after so long, it hurt. Worse pain than anything before. It always felt worse than the time before.
“Edward.” A strong, but oddly soft voice met my ears, and I snapped my head up. No one was to see me like this. Not this miserable.
“Edward, thank God I found you.” Emmett kept standing in the same place, but there was relief in his thoughts. Carlisle had sent him to make sure I was okay. I was never okay anymore.
“Emmett.” My voice was sharp as I stared back down at the floor, resting on my hands and knees. How pitiful for all of them to see me like this day in and day out. I knew I was breaking Esme’s heart everyday of my existence.
“Edward, what happened to make you run out on us?”
I waited for a second, controlling my impulses and the place in my chest, where it felt like my long dead heart was being twisted by a knife.
I only half listened to Emmett’s thoughts, all of which was concern for me. Why should they spare this unneeded pity on me, when I didn’t deserve anything? Although he didn’t speak to me, his inner mind was asking probing questions, which made my chest twang agonizingly again.
I stood up gingerly, quick but only half aware of my actions.He’s been so unresponsive. Maybe he should leave. It’s breaking all of us apart. He’s hurting more than he ever lets on…Rose is even scared at how far he’d go. It’s been the same for so long. Perhaps with these new vampires, they could help him…No; maybe it’s too much to ask-
Emmett’s inner prologue was halted as his senses kicked in. I didn’t listen to my own, and concentrated on regular breathing.
“Oh,” Emmett’s short welcoming seemed to freeze the whole clearing as a tall, feminine woman walked with fluid grace to stand opposite me, leaning on a far tree. She didn’t say a word, but examined the scene intently, trying to pick out everything and nothing at the same time. Her mind was a cool whisper, and I was trying so hard to block out.
Emmett breathed out again, a sigh. “Rayché, perhaps you could help my brother.”
“So this is where you went.” I ignored Mr Muscles talking.
“Rayché, could you help him?”
I stood still again, trying to analyse the scene. The crumpled one on the floor was clinging to his chest like- like…
This was strange.
I took a step closer, before swiftly closing the distance between me and the ‘man’ I guess you could call him on the floor. I knelt beside him, just looking intently at the way he was trying to control his breathing, stopping from shaking, the sound of the air being pressed in and out of his lungs.
“Edward, this is Rayché and-”
“Emmett. Quiet a moment.” I snapped up at him, still intent on the vampire at my side. The forest around us was quiet also, and the only sounds were of the few birds and the breath of air escaping from our lips. I rose back into my straightened position, noticing the metal links, hidden under my shirt on my arms, were strangely tighter again.
“Get up.” I told him quickly. The vampire on the ground ignored me for a moment.
“Up. Now.” I spoke again. “Don’t make me, make you.”
He rose to his feet steadily, despite my warning, and looked in the opposite direction from me immediately. We were about the same height, and I judged him automatically. He’d attack from the sides, to try and trick people earlier on, he’d depend more on speed seeing as he didn’t look as strong as his brother.
“Thank you for the kind gesture, but I am perfectly fine. Please accept my apologies for letting both you and my brother out here, without any reason to.” His voice was as dead as his eyes.
I gave him five seconds to shut up.
The next second I had kicked him in the stomach.
“Rayché, as much good as giving him a beating would be- what the hell did you do that for!” Mr Muscle sounded confused next to me.
“He’s just moping around. Don’t tell me he hasn’t been, because he’s been this way for a good few years I’ll bet. And he isn’t even trying to help himself. Now get up and face me.” I instructed him quickly.
By this time, the one on the floor had straightened and looked at me with anger and pain burning in his eyes. Although it was dulled by the fact that he looked confused and intrigued as to why I had resorted to kicking him. I flexed my muscles at the look on his face.
“What is your name?” He asked, the politeness in his voice strained.
“I’m Rayché, now my turn to ask the questions. Why are you depressed?”
I started pacing around him, deciding that if he didn’t give me a straight answer, I’d attack from his back. As if he knew my plans, he turned around, still facing me and keeping me in close view to him.
He stood tall. “I am not depressed. I am fine. I am sorry, Rayché, and you Emmett, for getting you worried for no reason, and for the use of unnecessary violence. I think we should all return back to the house now, seeing as the other…guests may be worried about you.”
I ran at him, my fist raised to strike, dodging to the right at the last second as I had intended. What surprised me was when he caught my wrist and held it pinned to midair. I twisted away from his grip and stayed still again, staring into his golden eyes. Too golden. He’d feasted on animals for much longer than myself.
“I’ll ask again; any reason to why you’re a dead beat vampire?”
“We are already dead.” He turned out of my gaze to look at Mr Muscles. “Emmett; I’m going back home. Please take Rayché back too.” He started striding out of the clearing.
“Ha” I barked over at him, folding my arms in a very human gesture. “I should have known you would back out.”
He continued walking, ignoring me until he came to the edge of the nearest tree. “Back out from what?”
“From trying. She’d have wanted you to try.”
He growled then. He snarled, smashing his hand against the nearest tree, so it shook violently, and snapped under his force. The bark flaked as the trunk fell over, a heavy smack as it reached the ground.
“You wouldn’t know anything about her! You don’t know anything about my…about her! No one does! I left and that’s all you know!” His words were fast but jerky, not wanting to give anything away. “You don’t know anything about her! She was mine! Nothing!” His body shook with the restraint I knew he wanted to fight me with.
“Fight me then. If you think I know nothing, prove it and fight me for her”
He snarled again, facing the opposite direction. “Stay away from me! I just want to be alone! I deserve to be like this. You don’t know what I did!” Then he ran, fast and quickly out of sight. I waited until I heard his footsteps no longer before turning to Mr Mus- or Emmett as I should have been calling him.
“At least he’s feeling something now.” I told him quickly
“What d’you mean?”
“He was empty. At least now he’s feeling some emotion. Even if it’s hate. That’s the best I can do for him.”
“Jazz said something about that a long time ago. How he was just empty. How even his manufactured feelings didn’t work because there was nothing to influence. I guess I should be thanking you, but…” He looked up into the sky as if hoping to let the subject drop.
“But what?” I asked him, walking to the other direction of the clearing, knowing I’d have to run home by now, if the others had left.
“But…I don’t know if it’s helped him at all. The idiot. That and the fact that I’m more interested in you’re fighting than my brother.” He scowled at the ground “My brother doesn’t deserve to fight and to feel if he won’t try.”
I snorted and drifted closer to the confinement of the tree’s shade against the moon, now well into the sky.“He doesn’t deserve anything if he doesn’t try.”
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