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Damaged by Awsomealice94“I better dream if I have to struggle” Story of 19 year old Mary Alice Brandon

Damaged by Awsomealice94 Disclaimer- i own nothing Story is finished, so posting should be done regularly :) i started this last winter and haven't told a single person about it until a couple of months ago-which was hard for me, as you can imagine :) i finished two days ago

9. Chapter 9

Rating 5/5   Word Count 2012   Review this Chapter

~Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he's bent for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?~
Switchfoot, Meant to Live

Carlton Sacks walked as swiftly as he could without drawing attention to himself to the fifth floor.

He passed startled nurses who hadn’t even seen him coming, and then he realized that he better slow down, just a little bit. He was so close….so close to telling Alice what he was. What James was. Those thoughts made him walk even faster in frustration.

“Carlton, you weren’t about to tell Miss. Brandon what we are, now were you?” James asked. He was seated in one of the many hospital rooms, though this was empty, except for the chair and James seated on top of it. James turned the chair that swiveled so that he was now facing Carlton, hoping that this would bring fear upon him. James wanted to show that he was listening and watching him very closely.

Carlton hated to lie to Alice-he really didn’t hear anything from the fifth floor. But he hoped that that would give her some hint- because he could hear things from the fifth floor-just not from anywhere near James.

“What would make you think that?” he asked, crossing his arms. There was no problem with a patient like the nurse had informed him. James simply wanted something from Carlton-though he didn’t know what. He was wary of the answer.

“You know, the Volturi could have your head for it.” James reminded him, smirking. But no, that wasn’t what he would do-tattle tailing to the Volturi would ruin his plan anyway. He wouldn’t get them involved, but it was fun to see the scared glint in Carlton’s eyes, even if it was for only a fraction of a second.

“What do you want?” he asked James, annoyed. He knew very well about the Volturi and the rules that followed. Although, he also knew that James didn’t seem like the Volturi-Follower type. Still, they would have his head for it if they ever found out.

“Help with a patient, of course.” He said, innocently.

“I don’t work with the shock treatments, you know that.” Carlton shook his head. James was the head of all of the shock treatments-Carlton didn’t think it was moral, so he tried to avoid them as much as possible. He even tried to stop them, so many times that the head of the asylum wouldn’t even listen to a word he said anymore.

“Yes, but I do. And it says here on this clip board that the next shock treatment date for Mary Alice Brandon is,” James looked down at the paper even if he knew what it said, “exactly today.” James said, now hiding a smirk.

Carlton was speechless-James was right. “Can’t we-” he tried.

“No, you know that. Not giving a patient treatment is against the rules, though we both have broken more than a few.” James was now standing up.

“James, she doesn’t need it. She-” Carlton was starting to become frantic.

“Sorry, I have to... but who can protect her better than another vampire?” he asked as he patted the flustered and panic stricken Dr. Sacks on the shoulder.

You’re the thing I am trying to protect her from. Carlton thought. He had the worst feeling about James, especially because he had a theory that James wasn’t a ‘vegetarian’ vampire like he was pretending to be.

“I won’t hurt her.” he promised Carlton as he left him standing in the room.

Yet, James added in his thoughts, walking towards Mary Alice.

Mary Alice was standing by the window, looking out at another cloudy day when she heard a slight tap on her door. She turned around to find a somewhat familiar face standing in her doorway.

“Hello, Mary Alice. I’m Dr. Cutting-Dr. Sacks introduced us the other day.” He said to her. He changed his demeanor from frightening to overly lovely. Mary Alice didn’t buy it for a second, but knew it was polite to say something back to the man.

“Oh, yes. It’s nice to see you again.” She said in an airy voice, most of her mind still consumed with Dr. Sacks and what he was about to tell her.

“Mary Alice, if you wouldn’t mind coming with me.” James gestured for her to come to him. Mary Alice knew who he was and where she was going. She wanted so badly to not move from her spot by the window. There was pain to come, and she could already feel it.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before walking to him, shaking, though she tried not to show it. She had been through these before-many times. She was supposed to be more numb each time, her body was supposed to get used to it. In some ways, she supposed that was true. But she was still afraid of where she was going and what she was about to do-it still hurt.

“It won’t be so bad.” He promised her as he led her out of her room, to an even bigger hell hole. This too shall pass she reminded herself, repeating it over and over again like a mantra.

“Every doctor says the same thing.” She whispered quietly to herself, knowing that a normal person couldn’t have heard her. But as soon as she said it and looked up, James had turned his head as if she was talking out loud to him.

She looked back down at her feet as they continued to shuffle down the hallway and up the stairs. Dr. Cutting didn’t talk to her much; he just sort of looked down at her every few steps.

James stopped at a door, putting in a key and unlocking it before walking in, holding the door open for Mary Alice. Oh please, not again she thought as tears stung her eyes. She took another deep breath before moving one foot after the other inside. Each step she took meant she was closer to more pain. She couldn’t try running or refusing to go in-that was always a bad idea. She tried it a couple of times, when she was smaller. It just resulted in people always catching her, pinning her down, placing a straitjacket on her and her screaming as she is carried back inside. Once they had shoved a needle inside of her-that hurt too much on top of the shock treatments. The last thing she needed was more pain, and so she learned to cooperate and shut down for the moment.

“There now-you’re never difficult.” James applauded as she walked in without a tantrum. She just looked at him-obviously the look she was giving him made him very uncomfortable. “If you could just sit on the edge of that table….” Dr. Cutting told her, motioning to a table with straps on it as he turned quickly away from her gaze. Mary Alice sat down on the edge, her feet dangling, as she tried to think of something to distract her from what was about to come. She felt like she was going to faint, her heart was going way too fast.

James couldn’t help but thinking that when she looked at him…she knew everything about him. It was like she knew his past, present, and future all at once. As if she was gazing into the depth of his…well, where his soul should be-now empty, he was sure. He shuddered, scrawling his signature on her form. The girl was just too…abnormal. Carlton HAD to be out of his mind when he took a liking to her….James looked around and shrugged-Carlton was out of his mind for even working in here-he is spending his eternity doing this? James could only do a few more weeks of this before he too went insane.

Mary Alice watched as Dr. Cutting wrote something down on a clip board before motioning for the other nurses inside the room to come and assist the tiny, pale and frail uneven black haired young girl sitting on the shock treatment bed.

“Mary Alice, you have done this before so I really don’t need to go through what they are doing, do I?” he asked her.

“No.” she said, barely above a whisper.

James stood behind a control switch of some sort as nurses laid Mary Alice down and strapped her tightly to the table. She was so tightly tied that she couldn’t move and she could hardly breathe. Electrodes were then applied to her head as Dr. Cutting took a needle and pricked her with it, sending some type of medicine into her blood system. She cringed-it hurt.

You stupid girl, this is nothing compared to what I have planned James thought before going back to the control box. James had to hold his breath though-he never had to for quite some time. She just smelt….really good. Floral maybe or perhaps it was like a spring morning, with the faintest hint of honeysuckle. James cringed-he must resist. At least, for now.

One nurse adjusted a knob before leaving the room, so that it was just her and Dr. Cutting.

He turned the power on, sending electric currents to Mary Alice’s head through the electrodes. She screamed as tears came into her eyes. Her head felt like it was on fire, pain coursed through her body as she shook. Normally the doctor would give her a second before he turned it on, so that she could think of something else before to distract her. James didn’t.

Dr. Sacks heard Alice screaming. He clenched his fists, walking quickly to the shock treatment room that she was in. James then turned the electric flow off, and the nurses stepped back in to take the electrodes off of her and to un-tie her. Mary Alice’s body ached all over, she was still shaking and tears were still rolling down her cheeks. It hurt more with every treatment-and then again it didn’t. She was getting used to the horrible pain-almost numb to it. Almost. Luckily, she didn’t break any bones-though she felt more weak than normal. There were also no burns from the electrodes as there were two weeks ago-the last time she had her treatment.

“I’ll get you back to your room so you can rest.” James said to her, taking her by the arm. He was even colder than Dr. Sacks. When James opened the door, Carlton was there. He was pacing with an anxious, furious, frustrated and sad expression on his face. Mary Alice hardly ever saw that expression unless he was really upset about something.

“Alice!” Dr. Sacks exclaimed, taking her by the hand, away from James.

“Carlton.” He nodded. Mary Alice’s eye lids were dropping, and she was still shaking. Her legs felt heavy, as if they weighed 100 pounds each.

“Alice, are you alright?” Carlton asked her, for she couldn’t walk. She gasped as she collapsed on the ground. She didn’t realize it though, for she was having a vision.

She was running with Dr. Sacks- they were both running away from something. He led her into the tunnels underneath the hospital. Then she was flown back into a stone wall…there was a blur…it was black

As she came back into reality, Dr. Sacks was kneeling next to her with an arm underneath her; James was still standing-wondering, no doubt, what was wrong with her.

“Alice, are you okay?” Carlton asked her. She nodded once, looking into his topaz eyes before her eyes drooped all the way down. She went into a deep slumber, feeling Dr. Sacks picking her up, his arms secured around her, was the last thing she would feel until morning.