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Perspective

Summary:
Edward told Bella he had talked with his father and brothers regarding their wedding night. This is my version of that missing moment from between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn and includes what Edward and Bella do to prepare for their first night together as husband and wife.


Notes:


13. Chapter 13

Rating 5/5   Word Count 1648   Review this Chapter

My family left me alone after that. The night was long. It was always longer when I was away from her. I could easily have gone hunting again to pass the time but that wasn’t appealing to me. Instead I leaned back against a large tree and closed my eyes. If we had to be apart, I would make the time productive.

Resting my hands on the ground at my sides, I let the memory of my love fill my senses. Her beating heart, her flowery scent came back to me almost as if she were here. In my mind, she was lying on her bed, hair billowing on her pillow framing her beautiful face. I reached out and ran a cold finger along her cheek and she leaned into to touch.

Allowing myself to get lost in my thoughts here where it was safe alone in the forest, I imagined myself closing the distance between us and pressing my lips to hers. She was eager as her mouth met mine. My hands cupped her face and her warmth heated my palms, the movement of her mouth massaging my hands adding to my pleasure. Sliding my hands down her neck, I felt the beating of her pulse as her heart continued to accelerate. Going lower still, my fingers brushed her collarbone.

I felt the tension in my body at what I was about to do. It was only in my mind but that didn’t matter. I had a very vivid imagination and this was as close to real as I would get until our wedding night when hopefully I would be able to touch her without barriers. When I would attempt to show my Bella just how much I love her.

My hand drifted to skim the top of her breast as I imagined her response and mine. I knew she’d be softer there. When I held her close to my chest, her breasts would press and flatten against my hardness. Touching them with my hands would be quite different. Bella loved when I touched her. The response of my body just thinking about touching the more intimate parts of her body was noticeable. As the hands of my mind floated to cup the soft mounds of my love, my breathing accelerated.

Concentrating on keeping my touch light I moved my mouth from hers and skimmed my nose against her jaw, neck and collarbone. We were both still very much clothed in my mind. I wasn’t ready to deal with no barriers yet, even in my imagination. I let my mouth follow my hand and settled my nose in the center of her chest. The sweet scent I knew would be there brought another round of tension to my limbs and I tried to calm down while not losing hold of my fantasy.

I was honest enough with myself to acknowledge that's what this was. This was ok though. Bella was going to be my wife, my mate. We were going to be together forever. I would love her in every possible way. I would be a good husband to her and make sure she never regreted choosing me.

Taking things slow and pausing when I needed to, I managed to make my way down her body. My hands were resting on her jean clad hips and my nose was hovering above the junction of her legs. I remember her scent. Not the one of her blood but the one that made her a woman. The one that brought more human instincts out in me and made me want to possess her in ways I could not.

It was at that moment I realized I had never been that close to her scent. I’d smelled it as I’d held her in my arms or kneeling beside her bed, but never the proximity I was now imagining. Surely it would be much stronger here and just the thought of it brought me crashing back to reality once again and my eyes popped open.

Glancing down at my hands I realized they were no longer lying peacefully on the ground at my side. They were two inches into the dirt. I pulled them into my lap and lay my head back once again on the tree. My handprints were clearly outlined in the soil by my side; soil that could very easily be my loves flesh in a matter of weeks.

The morning was breaking and I heard my family coming. They’d given me solitude throughout the night but they would be expecting me to hunt with them again today. Emmett appeared first, followed by Jasper and finally Carlisle. It was my father whose look questioned my well-being. I nodded reassuringly to him but he still held onto his worry. I always had difficulty lying to him.

Emmett and Jasper were anxious to get on with the hunt and made their way into the forest. Carlisle came up beside me and placed a comforting pat on my shoulder and then took off to follow my brothers. After another few seconds I followed them. There was no use dwelling right now. My body was tense from my mental exercise and I needed release. Release hunting could provide.

~

By the end of the day I’d managed to take down two cougars and a black bear. I’d come across a wolf as well but didn’t pursue it. I knew Bella would ask about my hunting trip, she always did, and I didn’t want to have to lie to her. She knew what we hunted and I wouldn’t deny my brothers their choice in prey but I wouldn’t knowingly cause my love pain. She loved Jacob Black no matter how much that fact pained me.

We were back in the clearing about two miles from the jeep. Emmett and Carlisle headed off to get some things from the vehicle leaving Jasper and I alone. I’d been thinking today about Alice’s suggestion. I didn’t like it. It went against my conservative grain but I couldn’t disagree with her reasoning. After what I’d experienced this morning, I wasn’t sure I could do this without his help. I hadn’t even realized I’d been pressing down so hard until I’d looked at my hands. There was no way I could make that mistake with Bella.

He sensed the change in my mood and looked over at me. What is it Edward?

I closed my eyes as I spoke. “Alice,” I pulsed. “she told you she talked to me?” I couldn’t believe I was bringing this up to him. “About you helping me I mean.”

I felt Jasper’s movement and opened my eyes. He had straightened his posture and was now facing me. “Yes.” His head tilted to the side observing me. “I like Bella. She will be a good sister and a good mate for you. If I can help you, I will,” he said with conviction.

I didn’t want to utter my next words but I knew I must. “Thank you. I would appreciate it.”

We both knew it could not be now. Carlisle and Emmett would be back soon and we would need privacy. When Jasper shared his talent with me it would affect anyone who happened to be near. The four of us were away from our mates this weekend and bringing our sexual desires to the forefront of all our minds was not a good idea.

With an unspoken agreement we sat in silence until Emmett and Carlisle reappeared with a deck of cards. My brother’s loved to play poker and Carlisle was quite fond of it as well. They didn’t usually play with me though, given my ability. It showed just how worried about me they were. I felt bad for making them worry.

Everyone took a seat in a circle as Carlisle dealt the first hand. To be fair, I tried to block their thoughts as much as possible. Bella, as always, was the only true object of distraction for me. I wondered what she was doing with her day. Would she spend time with her human friends for possibly the last time or would she spend it with the women of my family? Or…and I didn’t like this option…would she spend it alone?

I was so totally distracted with my thoughts that I’d missed what was going on in front of me. Apparently, I had bet a fair amount of money and Jasper had called. When I looked down at my hand I realized I had nothing. Jasper laid down his cards to revel a full house. Emmett gave a loud shout of triumph, even though it wasn’t he who’d won the hand. He was just happy someone had out-witted me for once. I usually cleaned house when we played.

While my brothers were celebrating and Emmett began shuffling the cards to the next round, Carlisle’s thoughts entered my mind. Edward are you sure you’re alright? I want you to be alright son. Can I help?

I met his eyes and through the silent communication we’ve developed over the years, I tried to reassure him again. He didn’t push, for which I was glad, but he didn’t fully believe me. Throughout the rest of the night we played. It was the most evenly matched game we had ever played together due to my distraction. I won my fair share of games but it was not my usual overwhelming victory.

Just before dawn Emmett pulled a huge pile toward him and fixed me with a huge smirk. “Little brother I think we need to get you distracted more often. This is great!”

He was so lost in his jubilance he didn’t notice my reaction. The other two did. I played one more hand and then excused myself. I needed to be alone. As I entered into the trees and began to run I heard the beginnings of a reprimand from my father.

Sorry Edward. I heard Emmett think just seconds before I was out of their field of thought.