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Perspective

Summary:
Edward told Bella he had talked with his father and brothers regarding their wedding night. This is my version of that missing moment from between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn and includes what Edward and Bella do to prepare for their first night together as husband and wife.


Notes:


21. Chapter 21

Rating 5/5   Word Count 2251   Review this Chapter

About a mile from the house Alice came through the trees. She paid me no attention as she went straight for her husband. They linked hands without a word and disappeared back into the forest. I knew where they were going and what they were going to do. I didn’t begrudge them of their ability to find release together; I only hoped one day I would be able to do the same with Bella.

With Jasper no longer with me, I pushed myself into a faster run. I finally felt the tension easing from my muscles as I neared her house.

I stopped at the edge of the clearing that made up her backyard. The sun was beginning to rise and Charlie was already up and moving around downstairs. I would wait until he left. I only hoped Bella would stay asleep until I was able to join her.

Listening, I could hear her heartbeat, her steady breathing. She was still asleep. I sat down, leaning against the trunk of a nearby Oak and listened to the sounds of her life. Slowly the remaining tension from tonight’s practice with Jasper dissolved.

Twenty-nine minutes later, Charlie left the house and got into his cruiser. As soon as he rounded the corner, I sped across the lawn and jumped into her window. My feet hit the floor and I looked over to see the first fluttering of her eyes. I had made it in time.

Walking to the side of her bed, I watched her eyes open fully. Her smile at seeing me filled me with such joy. “Good morning, love,” I smiled back.

She reached for me, pulling herself up. Her mouth made hard contact with mine. I tried to pull back a little so as not to hurt her, but she grabbed my hair and held tight.

I sat still as stone and eventually she removed her mouth from mine and brought her hands to rest on my shoulders. My fingers twitched as all the passion I’d just purged from my system threatened to take hold again.

Then she hugged me, burrowing her face in my neck. Her warm breathe brushing against my cold skin. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her close to me. “Morning,” she whispered.

I rubbed circles on her back with my right hand careful to keep them light. “Is everything alright, Bella? Not that I mind the wonderful greeting but…”

I felt her nod her head. She placed a kiss just below my ear and my eyes closed at the feeling of her lips. “How’d it go with Jasper?”

The motion of my hand stopped briefly and then started again. “It was…interesting.”

She nodded again. “Did it help?”

I didn’t pulse this time, “I think it will, yes, given time.”

Her head rose at this and she looked in my eyes. “So does that mean you are going to be spending all your nights with Jasper? ”

I saw the sadness in her eyes and I hated that I was the one to put it there. “Not every night but a lot of them, yes.”

“Oh,” she said softly. Her hand slid back into my hair and began massaging my scalp. I don’t think she realized she was doing it. She was thinking. I could see the thoughts moving behind her eyes. Abruptly her hand stopped its motion and her shoulders squared. “If it helps, then it will be worth it, right?”

“Yes,” I said. “If it helps me be able to love you as I wish, then it will be worth it.”

She nodded and then hugged me again. “I missed you last night.”

“So did I.”

We held each other for a long while before finally going downstairs and getting Bella something to eat. With breakfast finished and her bleeding stopped, we agreed to go to my house today. She ran upstairs to her room, saying she needed to get something.

Coming down the stairs I noticed an old book in her hands. As she moved closer I caught Carlisle’s scent and knew immediately what it was. She’d been meeting with him to discuss her change for the last few months. In some ways it unnerved me. I didn’t like to think about the fact I would be taking her life from her soon. In other ways I was glad she had Carlisle to help her prepare.

All of us, with the exception of Alice and Jasper, had been lucky enough to have Carlisle to help with that first year of the change. None of us, however, had had the opportunity to prepare before hand for both the physical and mental aspects of becoming a vampire. Bella would have something more and I knew Carlisle was the best one of us to show her, teach her. I couldn’t fault that either.

“Okay, I’m ready,” she said, slipping on her raincoat. It wasn’t raining hard right now, but in Forks that could always change. We got into my car and headed to the house.

As usual, Alice was waiting for us. “Bella!” she nearly screamed as she threw her arms around Bella.

My love returned the hug. “Hello, Alice,” she laughed.

“Oh Bella, I missed you,” she said as we began walking into the house. “You just can’t stay away like that. There’s just too much to do.”

With that, my sister and my fiancée disappeared up the steps. You can have her back in an hour, Edward. I have things that must be done and we’re running out of time.

I just shook my head at my sister and headed to the living room where I could hear Emmett. I wonder if he would still be up for that game now?

I didn’t make it that far though. As I rounded the corner, there Rosalie stood glaring at me with her arms folded. I want to talk to you.

This was not going to be good but I knew better than to put it off. When Rosalie had something to say, she would get it out one way or another. It was best to let her do it when I had some control over the situation.

Assuming she wanted to do this in private, I turned and headed for the back of the house. She followed. We quickly walked toward the river and jumped to the other side. After a little more walking, we both stopped and faced each other.

Her protective stance was back. Rosalie didn’t say anything right away. She just looked at me with fierce, determined eyes. I waited. She’d get it out eventually.

I wasn’t disappointed. “You’re really going to try and have sex with her aren’t you.” It wasn’t a question.

“Rosalie, I really don’t think that’s…”

“Don’t tell me it’s not any of my business, Edward. It’s all of our business. Do you really think you can do that without killing her?”

“Yes,” I said beginning to get angry. How could she even think I would do that to Bella? At the very least I would stop and we wouldn’t accomplish our goal. I’d make myself leave the room as I had that first day in Biology. What I would not do is kill the woman I loved.

She looked at me and shook her head. “I really hope you're right,” she sighed. “You know how I feel about Bella. I think she’s making a horrible mistake. She’s human and she has everything. Everything. And she’s going to give it all up. I can’t understand that. I don’t know if I’ll ever understand that. But I don’t want you to kill her either.”

“Thank you, Rosalie,” I said through clinched teeth. What was the point of this speech of hers? I already knew how she felt.

She sighed again in what seemed to be defeat. “I don’t mean to make you angry. I’m just worried.”

I made sure my anger was under control. “Don’t be.”

“If…”

I cut her off. “We’ll be fine.”

I was done listening. Bella should be done with Alice by now, hopefully. If not, I would remove her from my sister by force. It was bad enough I’d spent the night away from her; I would not spend the day without her as well.

Running back, I’d expected to hear Rose behind me but there was nothing. No sound, no thoughts.

~

I was two hundred yards from the house when I heard her. Bella’s voice was soft as a whisper. It was so quiet I couldn’t make out the words but I could tell it was coming from upstairs. At first I thought it was in Alice’s room but I was on the wrong side of the house.

My eyes drifted up until they found where the voice was coming from. Where the voices were coming from. Carlisle’s office. They were speaking in hushed tones but the window was open sending their voices down to me.

I came closer. Knowing I shouldn’t be listening. They obviously wanted their talk to be private given their low volume. I couldn’t stop myself from moving directly under the window.

My mind did a quick sweep of the other’s in the house; Emmett, distracted by the television, Alice in her room going over a list of some sort, and Esme, who I could tell was trying her best NOT to listen to the conversation going on only two doors down from her. I, however, wanted to listen. If they were talking about Bella’s change, then why would they be whispering?

There was complete silence for several minutes above me. I waited. Then I heard Bella’s voice. “Will his…I mean if we can really…do this,” she took a deep breath. “I know he has venom in his mouth but…but what about when he…”

I held my breath. Was she really asking what I thought she was asking?! To Carlisle? I shook my head and mentally berated myself. Of course if she was going to ask someone it would be Carlisle. Who else was she going to ask?

Carlisle’s voice was still at a whisper but his tone had changed. It was his doctor’s voice; the one he used when delivering medical advice to his patients. She was asking. If I was capable of blushing, I would be beet red right now. I could only imagine what Bella’s face looked like.

He began slowly, picking his words carefully. “No. It’s not quite the same, Bella.” I heard him shift in his chair. “Do you remember when Jasper showed you his bites?” he paused and I could imagine Bella nodding her head. “Our venom is a weapon. When we bite another vampire it causes a burning sensation. If the same flowed during our point of…intimacy, it would not be pleasurable for our mates.”

I had to admit I hadn’t thought about this and I realized I should have. A shot of self-loathing went straight through me. I’m supposed to be protecting Bella and I could have been putting her in more danger. I could have hurt her!

A strangled cry started low in my stomach and moved its way up to my throat. It took great effort to keep it from escaping and giving away my presence but I did. I was embarrassed enough at my slip. If Bella knew I’d overheard it would make her uncomfortable and I wouldn’t do that.

I heard her thank Carlisle and the door to his office open. Slowly I made my way inside. I didn’t want to move too quickly or she might suspect I’d been outside listening, which I had been but that wasn’t the point.

I stopped for a minute to say hi to Emmett as I’d planned earlier. He just gave me a sly smile and told me to have fun up in my room with Bella. Shaking my head I headed up the stairs at a human pace. As I passed by my father’s door, he called my name in his mind. Reaching out, I opened the door and entered his office.

The look on his face was disapproving and I knew immediately he knew I’d been eavesdropping. Bella asked to speak to me in private. I understand she is going to be your wife but you did not have the right to listen.

I tried to convey my remorse without words. I didn’t want to speak out loud and give the others an opportunity to hear. Carlisle nodded but continued his chastisement. If you are going to be married to her, Edward, you need to respect her as an equal. She deserves just the same rights as you have. I started to protest but he held up his hand to stop me. I know you love her. Of that I have no doubt. He paused and shook his head. Yours is a unique situation. We all know that. And we all love Bella.

I heard what his words weren’t saying. He wanted me to tell Bella I’d overheard them. He wanted me to confess my weakness to her. I didn’t answer at first. It was the last thing I wanted to do. But I trusted Carlisle. He’d been married longer than any mortal man. “I’ll try.”

He seemed satisfied with my answer. I walked back out into the hall and headed up the last flight of stairs. I could smell her scent drifting down from my room, our room. At the top step I turned and could see her sitting on my bed. She was reading and whatever it was had her heart rate at a slightly elevated pace.

I stepped through the doorway and her head snapped up. A deep blush covered her entire face and neck. I took a step forward and then stopped as I saw what she had in her hands.