Text Size Large SizeMedium SizeSmall Size    Color Scheme Black SchemeWhite SchemeGrey SchemePaper Scheme        

Perspective

Summary:
Edward told Bella he had talked with his father and brothers regarding their wedding night. This is my version of that missing moment from between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn and includes what Edward and Bella do to prepare for their first night together as husband and wife.


Notes:


25. Chapter 25

Rating 5/5   Word Count 2270   Review this Chapter

I spent the rest of the night reciting Shakespeare. That was a nice, safe activity. It also kept my mind busy so I would not think of the soft, warm, sensual woman lying against me.

Charlie left around six without bothering to come into Bella’s room, so I stayed and just watched her sleep. She was so peaceful and it helped to calm my own nerves. Her heart beat a steady rhythm that filled my senses.

At eight twenty she started getting restless and rolled over to the other side of the bed away from me. I remained still so not to wake her, but within a few seconds her breathing changed and her eyes opened. Turning her head, she locked her gaze with mine.

From the look on her face it was clear she was trying to gage my mood. Finally she must have seen what she was looking for because she rolled over to face me. We weren’t touching though, which I didn’t like but I would let her lead.

“How are you?” she asked.

My mouth pulled into a small smile. “Good.”

She sat up a little, resting her head on her arm. “Really? Are you sure?”

The smile on my face increased. “Yes, love. And how are you this morning?”

A smile broke out across her features. “Happy.”

“Happy?” I laughed. Of course she would be happy.

She leaned in to place a soft kiss on my lips and then jumped out of bed. “I’ll be back.”

Bella picked up her bag of toiletries and left me lounging on her bed. I stood and fixed the sheets. Although this was partly my meticulous nature, it also gave me to opportunity to indulge in the heady scent of her as the linens moved and stirred the air in her room.

When she came back, I was waiting in the rocking chair. She was still in her nightclothes and I could smell the lingering hint of her arousal from last night. A part of me hoped she would take a shower so I would not have to suffer through that the entire day. I also knew if we went to my house, which was very likely, my family would smell it as well.

As I watched her pick out her clothes for the day, the fact that I had not yet told her about overhearing her conversation with Carlisle began to eat at me. I knew what I needed to do. I just did not want to do it. Carlisle was right though. If she was to be my wife, I needed to treat her as such.

Bella turned around, a pair of jeans and a t-shirt in hand, and found me staring. “What?” she asked.

I closed my eyes feeling the guilt wash over me. The last thing I wanted was to admit my weakness to Bella.

She set her clothes on the end of her bed and walked over to me. Placing her hands on my shoulders, she sat down on my lap. “Edward, please tell me what you’re thinking.”

Slowly I looked up at her. Her eyes were so trusting and I was reminded again of how much I didn’t deserve her. “I need to tell you something, Bella. Something I don’t want to.”

“What is it? You know you can tell me anything.”

I gave her a sad smile. That was very true. Nothing I’d ever told her had been enough to scare her away. To make her hate me. I knew this would not be something that would push her away but I still felt ashamed.

Patiently she waited. She was so much more patient than I was. Closing my eyes I took a deep breath inhaling the scent that was my life.

Meeting her eyes again, “Yesterday at my house you were speaking with Carlisle.”

She looked a bit…startled. “Yes.”

“I over heard your conversation. The last part anyway.”

It took her a minute. I could see her going over the conversation in her mind. It didn’t take her long to figure out what I’d heard.

Her eyes widened a little. “You heard what I asked Carlisle. About us?”

“Yes.” And then it all began to spill out of me quickly. “I’m so sorry, Bella. I should have thought but I didn’t. I could have hurt you and I have no excuse for that. And I shouldn’t have listened to your conversation. I knew it was to be private but I couldn’t help it. My curiosity got the better of me and I wanted to know what you were saying. What you were asking. Can you ever forgive me?” By the time I’d finished I was looking down. I couldn’t look at her.

Bella was silent for a long time. Then she rose from my lap and went over to grab her clothes on the bed.

She still didn’t speak as she took the clothes out the door and into her bathroom. I could hear her getting dressed and, as always, wondered what she was thinking. Did she hate me? Was she more upset because of my lack of foresight for her safety or because I had listened to her conversation? I had no idea. There was never a way to tell with Bella. Whatever I thought, it was probably the exact opposite.

When she did finally re-enter her bedroom, she came to stand directly in front of me. I looked up and the look on her face was a mix of anger and sadness. I hated seeing that there and knowing I was the cause of it. I wouldn’t press her though. I would wait. She would talk to me when she was ready.

“Edward,” she paused gathering her thoughts. “Thank you for telling me. I know you didn’t have to.”

She was thanking me? Would I ever be able to guess what she was thinking or would she always surprise me?

“Your right, my conversation with Carlisle was private but since it had to do with both of us, I guess I’m not that upset you overheard. And though I wish you would’ve told me right away, I understand we were a little sidetracked yesterday.”

Her mouth lifted into a small smile before it straightened out again and then dipped into a slight frown. We must be getting to the bad part. Bella took a deep breath and her frown lines deepened. My anxiety was growing and I needed her to speak.

When she did, as always, it wasn’t what I’d expected. “Why is it that you think it’s only your responsibility to keep us safe?”

What? Obviously my silence was not the response she was looking for. “Tell me something, Edward. Whose idea was it to have sex? To try?” I was going to answer but she didn’t give me a chance. “Mine. It was mine. This is what I wanted. This was my condition remember. So why do you continue to think it’s only your responsibility to think of things? We’re in this together, Edward.” She glared at me. “Do you understand?”

“Yes,” I said weakly.

That wasn’t enough of an answer for her apparently. She just stood looking at me expectantly. “I understand that we are in this together, Bella. I will try to do better. I just…I worry.”

Her face softened and she reached out her hand to touch my face. “I know.” She moved to sit in my lap again and this time I wrapped my arms around her. “Please don’t. We‘ll be okay. We’re partners. Mates. Right?”

I nodded.

Her voice got softer. It felt like a caress as it left her lips. “That means we help each other. It isn’t only your job to look out for things.”

I buried my head in her shoulder. Sometimes Bella amazed me with her wisdom. She was so much smarter than her eighteen years gave her credit for.

We held each other for a long time just touching softly. I was so glad she was mine even if I didn’t deserve her or her love. I would try harder. Try to remember we were partners. We would work together to keep her safe.

~

After Bella ate something, we headed to my house. I could hear my entire family inside. Jasper, Emmett and Rose were in the living room. However, Esme and Alice were talking to someone over the phone about the wedding. I didn’t realize immediately who it was although I should have. They were talking to Renee.

Opening the door for Bella, I placed my hand in hers and started toward the house. She was still standing there looking at the house though. I glanced back at her and raised my eyebrow in question. Bella saw my look. “I’m just waiting for Alice to come barreling out like she usually does and whisk me away.”

I laughed and gave her arm a light tug. She followed this time. “Alice is a bit busy at the moment so no whisking today. At least not yet.”

She released an audible breath and leaned into me slightly. Bella was happy. I knew she loved my sister but sometimes Alice was too much, even for me.

We made our way inside and it only took thirty seconds for Emmett, Jasper and Rose to register Bella’s scent. Jasper and Rose at least had the tact not to relay anything in their thoughts except curiosity. Emmett, however, was his usual non-tactful self. I was just glad he didn’t say what he was thinking out loud in Bella’s presence.

I quickly pulled her through the foyer and into the kitchen. Alice bound over to Bella and I as soon as she took notice of us. “Morning, Bella,” she said wrapping my love in a hug. “Edward.”

“Hey, Alice.”

My greeting, for the most part, went unnoticed by my sister as she focused all her attention on Bella. They were talking about mundane topics such as what the weather forecast was looking like for our wedding and the planned upcoming shopping trip this Saturday.

Alice was going a pretty good job of keeping her thoughts on what she and Bella were discussing. Esme, however, from her position twenty feet away on the phone was not doing such a good job. She was still talking to Renee but she’d smelled the sweet scent Bella was carrying this morning and she was thrilled. Her mind was racing through all the things that could have possibly happened. She was so hopeful for us.

Her eyes left Bella and met mine. My look told her I’d caught her thoughts and she quickly apologized and went back to her conversation. After a few more minutes, I heard Esme tell Renee Bella was here. Obviously Renee wanted to speak to her daughter and Esme held out the phone. “Bella, your mom would like to speak with you.”

With a glace up at me, Bella released my hand and walked to the phone. I was going to stay and wait for her but Alice grabbed my arm and began pushing me out the backdoor. Her intension was clear. She wanted answers to what she smelled. Although I could have resisted her, I didn’t. Bella was not aware of what my family was smelling and thinking this morning and if she did it would only embarrass her.

So with that in mind, I willingly let my sister guide me out of the house and down to the river. She stood beside the water with a smug look on her face. “It’s not what you think, Alice.”

‘You don’t know what I’m thinking. I’ve been very careful about that,” she said with a little too much confidence in her voice and I was waiting for her to stick out her tongue at me but it never came. “So tell me. What did you and Bella do last night that has her smelling like she does this morning?”

“Alice.” This was not something I was going to talk about. Even to her.

“Oh come on, Edward. Stop being such a prude. We all know you and Bella are going to try to have sex and it looks like some progress must have been made last night.”

I sighed. She was not going to let this go. Of course that was typical Alice. “We talked.” There see what she’d make of that.

“Talking doesn’t do THAT, Edward,” she said with narrowed eyes. I shrugged. Alice continued to stare as if SHE were trying to read my thoughts.

All of a sudden her face changed and I saw where her thoughts were going. “No!”

“What?” she asked innocently.

“No, Alice. She doesn’t know we can smell it on her and you are not going to embarrass her like that.”

Her face fell a little but then she shrugged and smiled. “She’ll get over it.”

“No.”

“Then tell me.”

I stood with my fist clenched and my mind racing. Apart from ripping Alice’s head off and scattering the pieces, which would only delay the situation, there wasn’t much I could do to stop her. Not much except tell her what she wanted to know.

So with my entire body tensed I told her. I explained briefly about our pre bedtime conversation and then what had happened in Bella’s sleep. She looked slightly disappointed.

“So you didn’t have any part in it?”

“No,” I said tersely.

She huffed. “Well that wasn’t near as fun as I’d imagined. Pity.”

“Are we done now, Alice?”

“Sure.”

Before I turned to go though I looked back at my sister. “You won’t saying anything to Bella when we get inside?” She shook her head and that was good enough for me. I figured my love would be finished talking to her mother by now and I wanted to get back to her. Alice had already pushed my patience today with her questions. Bella was mine today. And even if we had to leave the house, we were spending the day together.