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Perspective

Summary:
Edward told Bella he had talked with his father and brothers regarding their wedding night. This is my version of that missing moment from between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn and includes what Edward and Bella do to prepare for their first night together as husband and wife.


Notes:


33. Chapter 33

Rating 5/5   Word Count 2869   Review this Chapter

I was at my love’s window the second I heard Charlie’s snoring. My night had been too long without her already and I just needed to feel her presence.

Bella’s breathing was slow and even. I knew she was asleep. It had been a long day and she needed her rest. It didn’t help the slight disappointment I felt in not being able to talk to her.

Taking a seat in the rocking chair so as not to disturb her, I watched the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she breathed.

Bella was always beautiful no matter if she were awake or asleep, but there was just something about watching her slumber. Something about how vulnerable she was made her all the more lovely. At night, all her defenses were down. She was open to me as she was at no other time and I could savor each and every movement that crossed her face.

An hour later the talking began. It was mostly mumbles and hums but there were a few words tossed in here and there. But it was when my love’s heart began to pick up it’s pace that I quickly rushed to her bedside.

Moments later her eyes flew open. They started frantically scanning the room until they focused on me.

I brushed her hair back away from her face, which seemed to relax her some more. “Are you okay, love?”

“Edward,” she sighed and then wrapped her arms around my neck.

My arms enveloped her, holding her close. “Bella, what’s wrong?”

She shook her head. “Nothing.”

It was obvious something in her dreams had frightened her but for now I just held her. With her head buried in my shoulder, I lifted her slightly and settled us back on her bed. She sank into me, as much as that was possible, and began playing with the collar of my t-shirt.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” I prompted.

Bella was quiet for a long time. I could tell she was thinking, debating whether or not to share. Then without warning her hands went from fingering my collar to reaching for the hem and plunging her hands beneath.

It was so fast; I didn’t have time to prepare. I sucked in a deep breath at the warm contact of her fingers against my stomach, which sent fire blazing down my throat. “Bella…”

She didn’t seem to hear me though or was past caring. Her body shifted and began pulling up on my shirt obviously wanting it gone. I only paused for a second and then helped her remove it.

As soon as it was out of the way, her mouth was on me. It was an insane sensation. This wasn’t like the other night of tentative touches and exploration. My head fell back against the headboard while my hands tangled in her hair.

Kissing and licking up my stomach and chest, she until she reached my right nipple. I was so lost in the feelings humming through my body that it didn’t register what she was going to do until I felt her lips circle me and suck as hard as she could. My fingers flexed against her scalp and I sucked in a large breath of air.

“Bella… Maybe you should…” My request fell on dead ears as I felt her tongue lick the rock hard part of me she now held in her mouth. Hands fisted as I tried to stay in control but it was difficult. She was relentless. While her mouth continued to do the most wonderfully torturous things, her hands were busy running along my stomach where my muscles were reacting by flexing over and over again.

Then she was straddling me. I could feel the heat of her through our clothing. And then she began rocking against me. I groaned. It felt so good but I knew I had to stop this. I just couldn’t remember why at the moment.

My breath was coming faster as a burning began in my groin. Instinctively, I grabbed her hips, feeling her flesh give way under my hands, and pulled down bringing her warmth in greater contact with my erection. I felt her lips give a little as she gasped at the contact. Her warm breath sent waves of heat over my now wet skin.

Her fingers held onto my sides tight as we rocked against each other. It was the absolute best feeling I’d ever experienced. Stop, an internal voice pestered me. Keep going, my body screamed. I was completely torn between the warring voices.

But finally the fire began to build where we were grinding against each other and my brain finally remembered why I needed to stop this. So before I could lose the will, I picked her up and flipped her over. Bella looked startled as she found our positions reversed with me hovering over her.

We were both still breathing heavily and I couldn’t resist placing another firm kiss to her beautiful mouth. I pulled back though before things could heat up again and we ended up in the same place we were only minutes before.

Bella was the first to speak, her voice still husky. “Why did you stop?”

I closed my eyes trying to keep my mind clear of the hormonal haze it was in. How could she ask me that? “Bella we agreed,” I paused and reached out to caress her face. “It’s only seven more days, love.”

Then I saw something cross her eyes, only moments before she closed them. “What is it?” She just shook her head but I persisted. “Please talk to me. Was it your dream?” She nodded. “Tell me,” I whispered while sliding down to rest beside her.

“I dreamt you left. The day of the wedding. You changed your mind. Said you couldn’t…”

She was working herself up again and I pulled her tighter into my embrace. “Love, I won’t leave you. Ever.” Then I lifted her chin so she would have to look at me. “You are my world. My mate. The entire reason for my existence. I love you and I need you, only you.”

“But what if…”

“Shh. No what ifs,” I whispered while continuing to try and sooth her with my hands. She began to calm down after a few minutes. But I began to wonder what brought this up. Bella’s dreams tended to be triggered by what was going on around her. “Will you tell me what brought this ridiculous thought to your mind?”

She snuggled closer, laying a hand on my chest. I took the moment to pull the blanket once again around her. Her heart kicked up a little before calming again and then, “I was talking to my dad tonight. He was worried about how we’d make it being so young. I told him you had money and we’d be fine but then he asked what would happen if once we left Forks things changed. I knew what he meant. He was trying to get me to consider there might be someone else out there for me once I saw more of the world.” Bella’s fingers were playing with my chest hair while she spoke but I was too concerned with her words. “Charlie didn’t realize how I’d take what he said.” Then she looked up at me. “I know you love me. But forever is a long time. What if you change your mind?”

The absolute insanity of what she was saying suddenly struck me as funny. I couldn’t contain my laughter. She frowned at my reaction so I tried to straighten my features.

Surrounding her face with both my hands, “I will never want or need anyone but you, Bella. I’ve been waiting one hundred years for you. How could you ever think differently?”

She had the foresight to look slightly abashed. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just… Well when Charlie brought it up it just sort of…” She sighed with clear frustration. “It’s stupid. I’m sorry. I know you love me as much as I love you.”

Leaning down, I placed a soft kiss on her forehead. “More.”

That got a smile out of her. “Not likely, Mr. Cullen.”

I smiled back. “Most definitely, Miss. Swan.”

She lay back down against me. “I can’t believe there’s only one week left.”

“I wish it were tomorrow.”

Her mouth curved up against my cold skin. “No second thoughts?”

“Not even a little. You?”

“No. Although I still don’t think marriage is necessary, it will definitely have its perks,” she said as she ran a possessive hand down my chest.

My chest vibrated with my amusement. “You have a one track mind.”

“Hmm.”

I chuckled again shaking my head. “You need to sleep, love.”

“Will you be here when I wake up?”

“I was thinking maybe you might want to spend some time with your father this week. He is off isn’t he?” Then I paused. “Of course, that was before he put that ridiculous idea into your head.”

Her lips brushed softly against my shoulder. “I think that’s a good idea. You said we’d have to leave as soon as we get back right?”

“Only if that’s what you want, Bella.”

She sighed but said, “It is.”

Then after a few minutes I heard her breathing once again become even and I knew she was asleep.

As the sun began creeping up in the sky, I left her. It was hard but something I had to do. She needed to spend time with her father without me there. Charlie never felt comfortable around me and I wasn’t sure that would change. Not that it ever should considering.

The run home didn’t end as I’d planned with me going up to my room to spend some quality time alone. Instead, I was met with my sister standing at the door. “Can we talk?”

I tried to go around her but Alice wasn’t having it. Sighing, I sat down on the step. “What do you want, Alice.”

Taking my queue, she lowed herself to sit beside me. “I wanted to apologize. You were right. I went too far. I should have known she’d put things together. I just didn’t see it until it was too late. Was it horrible?”

My hand came up to run through my hair. “Yes. She was very upset. And crying, Alice,” I said pointedly looking directly at her. “We made her cry.” Alice of course picked up on the ‘we’. “Yes, ‘we’. You may have helped her put the pieces together but I should have said something. She trusted me and I let her down. There’s not an excuse for that.”

Alice made no comment for several minutes. “Is she okay now?”

“Yeah,” I sighed. “She’s spending the day with Charlie.”

She nodded. “Esme and I are going to Port Angeles for the day. Jasper and Emmett are hunting.” I could hear Rose in her room but there was no sign of Carlisle, I figured he wasn’t home from the hospital yet.

Our conversation complete, I stood once again and this time she let me enter the house unobstructed. I went straight to my room and put in some music. This would be a long day without Bella with me but I would make the most of it.

My eyes fell on the Karma Sutra book still lying untouched on my desk. I realized I had never looked at it since Emmett had presented it to me. Now was as good a time as any given the time I had to pass, so I picked it up and began flipping through it.

At first, I thought it was much like the other until I arrived at the halfway point. That is when the pictures began.

These were not real life pictures but drawings, thankfully. They were bad enough. The chapter was called Exploring Different Positions. The next fifty pages proceeded to ‘show’ each position and explain it along with its advantages and disadvantages in detail. Some of the ‘positions’ left me wondering how humans actually accomplished them. I supposed if one were an acrobat it would help but how would a normal person contort their body that way?

Not that it mattered. Bella and I would have to keep things very simple and straightforward. At least, until she was changed. I couldn’t take the risk, I wouldn’t.

I took my time as I flipped the pages one by one making mental notes of some I would like to revisit after Bella had changed and adapted to our life. There was a second when I wondered how many Emmett had tried out personally and then pushed that thought far away. Not in a million years did I want to know the answer to that question although I knew he would willing share should I ask. It was actually a surprise he’d not marked the pages for me of his favorites.

My family, for the most part, had been very supportive with what Bella and I were going to try to accomplish. Of course, some were a little too supportive. There was nothing to be done about that however.

After the positions chapter was one on “Spicing things up.” I didn’t think that would be a problem for us anytime in the near future but I read it anyway. Some of the suggestions were more than embarrassing and I was once again glad, for a very different reason that I’d chosen the other book to read with my love. This would have been too much.

At just past noon, I was finished up my reading when I heard Carlisle arrive home. He could hear the music coming from my room and in less than a minute was at my door. Hello, Edward. Looking around he took in the fact I was alone. “Did Bella have plans today?”

“She’s spending some time with Charlie.”

He nodded. “That is a good idea.”

Carlisle didn’t need to voice his thoughts farther. We all knew what was coming one way or another and that her time with her father was quickly coming to an end.

“I was going to go for a short hunt. Would you like to join me?” he asked.

“Sure,” I responded not really needing to but being here in my room all day counting down the minutes until I could go to her again was beyond frustrating.

The man I consider my father was a rather solitary man when he hunted. Rarely would the rest of us go alone. Carlisle, however, almost always went by himself unless it was a group hunt. And now, as we ran, even his mind was silent.

I remember hunting with him those first few years before Esme joined us. Back then, it had been purely for my benefit, but I’d enjoyed our time together. He’d taught me everything I knew as a vampire and many of the things I knew as a man. Carlisle had always encouraged me and I was heartened by the knowledge that it would be he who would stand beside me when I married Bella.

Thirty miles out, we caught scent of some elk. There were five of them and we wasted no time bringing two of them down and draining them.

The warm liquid felt good going down my throat and I felt the heat seep through my limbs. It reminded me of Bella’s heat how it got inside and worked it’s magic all the way down to my toes. That thought, of course, let to others including the feel of her mouth last night and I groaned.

Carlisle lifted his head and looked over at me. Then a knowing smirk crossed his lips. If it had been Emmett, or even Jasper, I would have had to suffer an unbearable level of teasing for my slip. But this wasn’t either of my brothers and Carlisle let it go without comment.

By the time we arrived back at the house, Alice and Esme had returned. And by the amount of packages in the living room, I guessed the trip was a success. All I got from Alice’s thoughts were that they were things for the wedding so I left them be and went back up to my room.

Jasper and I had discussed practicing again but nothing specific. He was still out with Emmett now, but I wanted to know if he’d be back tonight.

After a short phone call, I was told they were already on their way home so I called Bella to let her know I wouldn’t be over this evening. She was disappointed. I could hear it in her voice. It was almost enough to make me change my plans. In the end, I told her I’d see her in the morning and agreed we would spend the day together. She told me that although she loved her dad dearly, she’d been bored to tears most of the day.

So with the thought of seeing my love again come morning, I put on another CD, lay on my bed and waited for Jasper and Emmett’s return.