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When you didn't die

Summary:
New Moon AU: Alice never told Rosalie that Bella jumped, and so Edward never knew, and didn't go running off to the Volturi. Alice, however, still went to check on Bella. Starts during New Moon, when Charlie's at the funeral and Bella and Jake are at the kitchen table. Create your own banner at mybannermaker.com!


Notes:


9. Orange Cranberry Muffins are so good.

Rating 5/5   Word Count 2996   Review this Chapter

“Edward?” I called, reaching forward to touch him. Facing away from me, he was looking into the wind, staring coldly down to the water below the cliff. “Edward, please, look at me,”
His face turned slowly to meet my gaze, and I screamed. His eyes were a deep, terrifying burgundy. He smiled grimly. “Love, you chose your path. I chose mine.” His soft voice was chilling.
“I…I didn’t choose to be left!” I shouted at him, anger building up inside me. “I didn’t ask for you to break my heart. I didn’t want to have to be fixed by Jacob. It was entirely your fault!”
He looked pained. “Isabella,” He whispered. “Run.”
“Wha-” I gasped as a monstrous wolf barreled past me. The russet wolf growled at the vampire, who in turn snarled.
They leapt, aiming at each other’s throats.

“Bella! Shh, please, it’s alright!” Jacob said, shaking me gently.

“Jake,” I breathed in relief, opening my eyes. I buried my face into his shoulder.

We sat together for a moment. “Umm, Bella…are you , uh, better now?” He asked awkwardly.

“Yeah,” I said quietly, pulling away. I glanced around the room, realizing that it was my own, and saw the clock. The bright red numbers read 5:57 am. “Ughh, school,”

Jacob laughed slightly. “Oh, come on, it can’t be that bad. You’ll just have to sit there all day dealing with rumors of why the Cullen’s are back and what even happened with them. Not to mention you’ll have to deal with the leeches themselves.”

I wasn’t surprised to hear the anger in his voice as he mention the Cullen’s.

“Well, I’d best be off. Time for some breakfast,” I said cheerfully, the thought making me smile.

“Yeah!” Jacob said, excited. At the prospect of getting food, no doubt.

I scampered down the stairs, Jake on my heels. Entering the kitchen, I gasped. There were two plates piled high with eggs, bacon, and pancakes sitting on the table, accompanied by two glasses of orange juice.

“Surprise!” Jacob said.

“Aw, Jake, you made this breakfast?” I was pleased, to say the least.

I turned to find him only an inch behind me and closed the gap by pressing my lips gently to his. He grabbed my back and twirled me around so that I was bending backwards.

“Jake!” I laughed, pushing my way out of his hold.

“I just wanted to do something for you. With the leeches back, I need to score as much Bella time as possible.” He said in explanation.

“True, true,” I agreed, already stuffing some eggs into my mouth.

Jacob plopped down next to me and forked a pile of pancakes into his mouth.

“This is really good!” I said through the food. Who knew Jacob was such a good cook?

Jake got an evil glint in his eyes. “Whoa, Bella, look outside the window! It’s a deer!”

I spun my head around, eager to see it. Deer were so pretty. All I could see, though, were some trees. “Where?” I asked eagerly.

WHAM.

Something sticky and warm slammed into the back of my head. “Jacob Black!” I screamed, turning to face him.

He was doubled over in laughter, his hands covered with syrup from the pancake he threw. “Gotcha!” He managed to gasp.

I glared. “So not funny, Jake,” I said, reaching for some eggs.

He sobered up. “Sorry, honey, I didn’t mean to hit you. Well, yeah, I did, but still-”

He was cut off by the eggs covering his face.

“This means war, Jake!” I cried, laughing.

“You’re so on,” He insisted. His massive hands grabbed some bacon and crushed it into pieces, throwing each of them like little darts.

***

I burst into first period, dropping into my seat right as the final bell rang. My hair still dripped water down my back, evidence of my rapid shower.

Mike turned around from his seat diagonal from me. “That was close, Bella. What were you up to this morning?” He asked, smiling pleasantly.

“Er, lost track of time,” I said truthfully. Our conversation was ended by a “Shush!” from the teacher and Mike turned back to the front.

I started doodling aimlessly on my notebook, knowing that Mr. Kepper didn’t have anything important to say. My months of depression had helped me to get ahead of the class, so my mind was always free to wander.

“Oh my God, he’s so fine” I heard Lauren gasp from the front of the classroom. I glanced up and froze. Lauren was looking at the gorgeous blonde in the front of the room.

Jasper Hale was handing a slip of paper to our teacher, grinning at me.

“Alright, class, Jasper Hale will be joining us for the remainder of the year. Please take a seat next to Ben, Jasper.”

Of course, that seat happened to be directly behind me.

“You go on back to your work, Bella. No staring,” Jasper said quietly as he passed, his southern drawl causing the girls around us to sigh longingly.

I shook my head and smiled. Having Jasper in class would be fun.

About halfway through class, my eyelids started drooping. “Jasper, quit it,” I mumbled silently, knowing that I had gotten a perfectly good night’s sleep. Instantly, I felt wide awake. I turned and stuck my tongue out at him. His eyes widened innocently.

My neighbor, Conner, scooted his chair a little closer towards me. I peeked up at his face to find that he was staring at me intently, his lips slightly parted.

“Uh, Conner? You okay?” I asked, waving my hand in front of his face.

“Yeah…” He said his voice faraway.

“Okay then,” I looked back down at my paper.

He scooted a little closer, and set his hand on top of mine.

“What are you doing, Conner?” I asked, snapping my hand back.

“Bella,” He whispered urgently, “I love you! Please, will you be my girlfriend?”

He reached for my hand again. “No!” I replied, my voice as quiet as I could keep it. “Jasper, stop!” I said, turning and glaring at the blonde vampire.

“Yes ma’am.” He said, saluting me.

Conner, still leaning towards me, got a look of confusion on his face. “Sorry, Bella,” He mumbled, pulling back. He shook his head a couple of times.

“That was cruel,” I said noiselessly, a slight giggle escaping.

Yes, class with Jasper would be interesting.

Luckily, or perhaps unluckily, the next few classes were Cullen free. I headed towards lunch with Angela, dreading seeing Edward.

When we walked through the double doors, I peered around to find out where they were sitting. Angela had a knowing look on her face.

“Are you sitting with us today?” She asked.

“Yeah,” I said confidently, finally spotting the vampires.

The three of them were sitting together at the table that they had occupied last year. Alice smiled brightly at me and waved, while Jasper grinned and sent wave of exuberance towards me, conveying his greeting. Edward glared down at the table.

“Hey guys,” I whispered silently. Then I turned my back on them and walked with Angela to stand in the lunch line.

After I purchased my piece of rubbery pizza, I sat down at my table, just in time to hear Mike complaining about Edward.

“…and I was like, damn, Cullen, can’t you just let me have a single girl?” He demanded, in deep discussion with Eric.

“I know! All the girls that would’ve gone to the dance with me said no since they saw him,” Eric whined.

“Real mature, guys,” I said, bringing the table’s attention to me.

“So, Bella…have any classes with the Cullen’s yet?” Jessica asked, eager to hear gossip.

“Yeah, actually. Jasper’s in my Calculus class.” I answered, trying to see any malicious intent. Finding none, I figured that it might be possible that she had forgiven me for my zombie period.

“And it’s not, like, awkward, or anything?” Jess pressed.

“Nope,” I said, popping the P. “It’s all good,” I smiled and took a bite of pizza. She seemed let down by the lack of drama.

“Didn’t you date Edward Cullen?” Asked a sophomore girl who was at the far end of the table.

“First of all, who are you? Second of all, yeah,” I said, not caring that I sounded incredibly rude.

She blushed and muttered, “Sarah,” before turning to her friends.

“When did she get to our table?” I asked Angela, glancing at the group of younger kids.

“You’ve missed a lot, Bella,” She laughed. “But don’t worry…I don’t think I’ve ever talked to any of them, much less know their names.”

I shrugged and took another bite of pizza.

By the end of lunch, I’d stolen four glances at the Cullen’s, and each time Edward was still glaring at the table, not making any effort to even appear to touch his food.

Walking to English, I felt dread forming in the pit of my stomach. I had been lucky so far – Edward was probably in one of my next classes.

When I reached the classroom, I stopped and took a deep breath. Leaning forward so that my head could peer into the doorway, I saw that the seat next to me was still empty, and no bronze-haired gods were sitting in the room. I breathed a sigh of relief. I sank into my seat and pulled out my notebook.

Mike came over and sat on my desk. “Hey, Bella!” He said brightly. “Are you going to be at work tonight?”

I gasped. “Dang it, I forgot about work. Yeah, I’ll be there.”

“Are you doing anything after?” He asked.

“Uh, yeah. I’m going out with Angela, and then maybe hanging out with my boyfriend,” I said, making sure he knew what Jacob and I were.

“Oh yeah, okay,” Mike said sadly. His face brightened. “But maybe we could hang out sometime…everyone. Like, the group,” He said.

Hmmm…did you mean that he understood that I was, I don’t know, way out of his league? Apparently.

“That sounds fun,” I agreed, smiling at the thought. “Maybe we could all go to the beach again.”

“Excuse me,” A quiet voice said from the side. Mike and I turned to look in unison at the musical voice we both recognized.

“Cullen,” spat Mike.

“Edward,” I said politely.

Mike slid off of the desk and walked over to his seat, glaring at Edward.

Edward gracefully sat down beside me.

“So, decided you wanted to come back to high school?” I asked softly, determinedly looking straight ahead.

“Yes, one can’t get enough of learning,” He said, also not looking at me.

Mr. Mason called the class to order and began talking about last night’s assignment.

“Listen, Edward,” I turned to face him, and he copied me. “I…I don’t want it to be bad between us right now. So can you try to like me enough to be friends?”

He looked offended, for some reason. “You think I don’t like you?” His voice was upset.

Thankfully, the room was full of hushed conversations, so no one could really hear us.

“Um, I kind of know you don’t like me. You told me yourself, you don’t love me anymore. But I’m hoping that that doesn’t mean hate, because it’d be nice to still have friendly relations with your family.”

He frowned and looked down. “That’s a lie. I didn’t know you would believe it so readily. I love you, Bella, don’t doubt that.”

“Dammit,” I murmured. “You know Alice told me that, right? Frankly, I didn’t believe her. And I have no reason to believe you,”

“If you don’t, that’s completely acceptable. I just love you, still, as much as I ever did. I want you to live a nice, happy, human life. But I need you, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to win you back,” Edward insisted, raising his eyes to meet mine again. I looked forward, tears beginning to brim in my eyes.

“Don’t lie,” I said, barely making a sound.

“I’m not,” Edward said confidently. “How can I prove it to you?”

“I don’t know,” I breathed. One the one hand, I loved Jacob – my sun, the one who had helped me through the pain. On the other, Edward was…Edward. And for some reason he said that he still loved me. I wanted to believe him…but how could he? And how could I simply forget about the last few months? About the pure aching that I went through because of Edward?

“Please, Bella, let me prove to you that I have never stopped loving you. I left for your own good, to try to save you from the monster I was,”

By now there were definite tears slowly slipping down my cheeks.

“I don’t think I can let you. You don’t know how much pain I went through when you left. You really hurt me, Edward,” I mumbled, begging myself not to cry.

“I’m so sorry Bella; just let me make it up to you, please-” I cut him off.

“I can’t love you right now. I don’t think I’ll ever be completely better. Jacob’s done so much for me, but no one can fix what you did,” I admitted in a rush, furiously wiping away the traitor tears.

“Excuse me, Bella…are you alright?” Mr. Mason said from the front of the room. 27 pairs of eyes focused on me, and a few wandered over to glare at Edward.

I didn’t trust my voice, so I merely nodded. Our conversation had been noticed.

“Would you like to move seats?” He asked kindly, sending a look of disgust at Edward, who flinched.

I nodded dumbly again, scooped up my things and moved three rows forward to sit by Angela, who gave me a reassuring smile.

I glanced back at Edward once, and he was staring at me with outrage plain on his beautiful features.

The rest of the period I spent staring straight ahead, taking careful notes and meticulously completing everything.

As the bell rang, Edward brushed by me, a note falling onto my notebook. Rather than reading it, I stuffed it into my backpack, knowing that if I wanted to keep from breaking down I’d save it for later.

The last period of the day was much, much better.

Alice sat across the aisle from me. “Bella, Edward should’ve known better! I’m so, so sorry for what he did,” She said right as I sat down.

“It’s okay, Alice,” I said quietly, still not trusting my voice enough to speak at a regular level. “I don’t blame you at all.”

We spent the class passing notes about random stuff, stuff designed to make me laugh and turn my mind to things Alice knew would help me out.

The final bell rang, and I walked with Alice out to the parking lot.

“I’ve got work, and then I’ll be at Jake’s. Call me if you need anything,” I told her once we reached my truck, at the opposite end of the lot, the shiny, silver Volvo was parked, and Edward and Jasper were standing silently by it, watching us.

“Yeah, see you,” Alice said, hugging me tightly. She danced away, and I threw my stuff into the cab.

“Bella!” I turned to see Angela running towards me. “Hey,” She gasped once she reached the truck. “Whew. I really don’t like running.”

I laughed.

“So, did you want to go to the movies tonight?” She reminded me.

“Yeah,” I said. “I’ve got work until 5, so maybe we could get dinner and then see a something?”

Angela nodded. “That sounds good. How about I pick you up at your house at 5:30? We’ll be in Port Angeles by 6:30, and tomorrow is Saturday so we can stay out later.”

Where had the week gone? “Great! I’ll see you later!” I waved and headed straight to Newton’s Outfitters.

I was shocked to find that today was Friday. I guess dealing with vampire drama had helped life to go faster.

Work was busier than usual – the camping season was starting. Hikers needed new boots, tents, crappy dried food.

The bell on the door jingled, and I glanced up from the register to see who the latest customer was. “That’ll be $13.95,” I said to the man buying the latest in our line of flashlights while looking over his shoulder.

“Thanks,” He said before rushing out, passing by Carlisle Cullen.

“Hello, Bella,” He said kindly, walking up to me. “I need to purchase a new tent,” He leaned across the counter and lowered his voice. “To keep up the image,” He said humorously. His gold eyes danced. “It’s really good being back.”

I blushed. “It’s good to have you guys back,” I said, though it sounded like a confession. And before I knew it, I was telling Carlisle all about the last few months, how I couldn’t even tell Alice the most basic things about our school, how I would move through the day without realizing it, about Jacob, and Edward. It was a miracle that nobody came into the store then, and Carlisle just stood silently and listened as I went on.

“Bella, you know that you’re like a daughter to me. I hope you don’t let Edward’s foolishness come between you and our family.” He said once I had finished my little rant.

“Thanks,” I said genuinely.

“Hello, Dr. Cullen,” Said Mike, wandering over to us. He came to stand protectively next to me.

“Hello,” Carlisle said politely. “Do you think you could help me find a two person tent? Our last one was unfortunately lost in a storm,”

“Sure, right this way,” Mike led him down another isle and I was left at the register, thinking about how lucky I was. Even though I suffered more heartbreak than any other teenager I knew, I had friends and family that I could really count on.