This is La Tua Cantante in Edward's POV--as was promised. A lot of your unanswered questions from BPOV will be answered in this story. So I hope you enjoy and please rate and comment. I love hearing from you guys!
17. Chapter 17: Third Time's a Charm
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I arranged a trail of rose petals in the hallway, leading down the stairs out to the edge of the forest, after getting dressed, and then I got the ring and hid in Carlisle's study, waiting for Bella to come out.
Once she did, I simply listened to her call for me.
" 'Edward!' "
I didn't answer, wanting to see her reaction to see how much she wanted to kill me right now.
I could have sworn I heard a smile in her voice as she called again, " 'Edward?' "
I froze up, terrified she would hate what I was about to do. And, I could never stand for her to hate me. It was times like this that I despised my inability to read her mind. She could make out to be happy, but was she really? Or was it all a facade?
Was I being foolish to put her in this position again?
I listened to her as she followed the trail outside and went to the window to see her reaction.
She chuckled, looking almost genuinely happy...or dare I say...excited. Huh. She must be getting better at lying than I thought. If I didn't know any better, I wouldn't have caught any flaw in her charade. Did she really enjoy this?
She practically ran to the edge of the forest, smiling brightly, and looking around for me, as the wind picked up, blowing her hair around her face. She chuckled again and held it back with one hand.
Oops. I had completely forgotten to meet her at the end of the trail. I was just so mesmerized by her--her beauty, her feigned excitement...I just lost myself in her...I always lost myself in her. It was just so easy to do.
I sped gracefully out of the room and was behind her before she could turn around and see me.
She looked so confused. I smiled my crooked smile, amused by her confusion. I shouldn't be--it was rude, but I couldn't help it.
She turned around and sighed, impatiently, "There you are! Where were you?"
She looked so amazing, I lost the ability to speak. I had no choice but to gesture wordlessly for her to come to me.
She obliged and I took her hands, kissing each one softly, before pulling her into my arms, holding her against me, with one hand resting on the small of her back.
I hated to rip off Carlisle and say what he had just said to Esme, but I could think of no other words for this moment. As horrible as I felt, having to resort to this, I had no other choice. It was either this or nothing.
She deserved everything, but I could never give her that. But, so long as she so stupidly took what I had to offer, I would offer her my all--my dead heart, my possibly nonexistent soul, my pathetic universe--all I was belonged to her.
I kissed her temple, trailed my lips down to her ear, and kissed it--God, it felt so amazing...she had so much power over me it was terrifying yet beautiful all at the same time-- and I said, softly:
" 'Love of you is mixed deep in my vitals--' " I didn't have vitals-- " 'like water stirred into flour for bread, like simples compound in a sweet-tasting drug--' " she was my sweet-tasting drug-- " ' like pastry and honey mixed to perfection.' " Ew. They couldn't have used blood for that analogy? Stupid humans. What the hell did they know? " ' Oh, hurry to look at your love!' "
Now that I would do with no complaints. I pulled away to look into her eyes, struggling to continue on, dazzled by her extraordinary beauty.
" 'Be like horses charging in battle--' " Horses?! Horses were weak. " ' Like a gardener up with the sun burning to watch his prize bud open.' " Hah! I didn't have to wait for the sun. " 'High heaven causes a girl's love longing.' " Or low pathetic hell; whatever floated her boat. " 'It is like being too far from the light, ' " Call me weird; I happen to like the dark-- " 'far from the hearth of familiar arms. It is this being so tangled in you.' "
Which did not bother me in the least--in fact, I found it quite incredible...to say the very extreme least.
"That's beautiful..." she said, obviously entranced by the words...and by me. HAH. I win. Pathetic as I was, she still bought it. "What is it?"
I couldn't help but smile at her reaction. Did she really think so little of herself as to settle for a vampire who was inevitably damned to hell? ,
"No one's really sure. It's ancient Egyptian poetry. Carlisle quoted it to Esme."
I didn't mention that the most recent was today. I might have been pathetic, but she didn't have to know that. Besides it wasn't a lie...he did quote it to her all the time. It used to annoy me, but-- "I didn't understand what it meant..." I spoke that thought out loud, "...until I met you. You bring those words to life in me. You brought me to life by loving me. Those years before I met you, I was dead. Blood was keeping me alive, sure. I might have been walking and breathing--technically--but, I was dead. I wanted so badly to be able to bleed. I would've bled just to know I was alive. Then, I fell in love with you and it was as if my heart had begun beating again. You made it beat; you gave me the most beautiful life I could ask for. I love you...so much."
I was past making fun of myself now. Now, I was just so afraid she'd turn me down just because I'd asked her three too many times. Never in my life had I ever felt fear--true fear--but, right now, I was so afraid, wanting just the confirmation that she really wanted me forever, despite her aversion to marriage, which was surprisingly stronger than even her averson to blood.
As for me, I would give up blood forever if it meant I could marry her and have her to be mine forever...it would be hard, but I would do it...I'd do anything for her if she deemed it necessary to be with her.
"I love you," she managed to say.
I forced a nod, struggling to hide my horror at doing this again, risking everything for it. "I know that." I assured her. But...she had to know that sometimes love just wasn't enough. I didn't just want her love...I wanted her...all of her. I needed her.
"And, I apologize deeply for this," that seemed a good way to start off so she wouldn't hate me, "but it is customary and it just...feels so amazing. There is no feeling like it. Like having you agree to be mine...forever. So..."
I struggled to not tremble as I hesitantly got to one knee and pulled out the new ring.
She stared at the ring in awe--hopefully a good thing--and I continued on, my fear consuming me, but my love for her making me strong enough to go through with it.
"My beautiful Bella...will you marry me? Again?"
She stopped breathing, which made me inevitably stiffen up.
I braced myself for a no when she breathed, "Yes."
Yes? Yes?! Oh, my God...she just said yes!
I struggled not to injure her finger more I slid it onto her ring finger, mindful of her fracture.
"Yes, yes, yes, a million times yes." She said, laughing, as I rose to my feet, picked her up and spun her around, kissing her all the while.
I was astounded by how happy she was. She truly was happy--she could never lie this good. I knew for a fact that she was just as thrilled as I was now. Oh, God, I could not even begin to explain the feelings of happiness that surged through me.
"Can I have you?" She asked, as we pulled away.
Was she actually saying these words? "Forever and ever, love." I said, with a smile, setting her to her feet. "I'm yours."
She smiled and allowed me to lead her back into the house.
All my fear melted away, replaced by overwhelming love and happiness. It was too much for anyone to bear. I had never felt so complete in all my life...she was so insanely incredible--she was my love, my destiny, my soulmate.
- Chapter 1: Nothing
- Chapter 2: Risks
- Chapter 3: Life and Death
- Chapter 4: Carpe Diem
- Chapter 5: Proposal
- Chapter 6: Breakfast
- Chapter 7: Grizzly Bear
- Chapter 8: Mountain Lions
- Chapter 9: Control
- Chapter 10: Misery
- Chapter 11: Realizations
- Chapter 12: Courage
- Chapter 13: Intimacies
- Chapter 14: Alone
- Chapter 15: Sex Dream
- Chapter 16: Discussions
- Chapter 17: Third Time's a Charm
- Chapter 18: Celebration
- Chapter 19: Triumph
- Chapter 20: First Night
- Chapter 21: The Civil War
- Chapter 22: Absurdities
- Chapter 23: Dealings
- Chapter 24: Unrepentance
- Chapter 25: Comfort
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- 29 Oct 08
- 09 Jan 09