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Existence

Summary:
What would have happened had the Volturi decided to grant Edward his wish and kill him? Would Bella have been able to get to him in time? Would the Volturi show mercy on them still? Bella races to save Edward's life, though one thing has changed...Edward will be killed.


Notes:


2. Chapter 2: Heroine

Rating 4.5/5   Word Count 1602   Review this Chapter

How could Alice have left me? How could she left him? Who gave a damn what the Volturi did to me? They couldn't hurt me anymore than they would if they killed him. I would not let that happen. I didn't care what they did to me--maybe dying would be a sweet release from the endless pain and torture of knowing that I would never be good enough for him; knowing that he could never love me; knowing that he never did.

I just wish I didn't have to do this alone. But, I would--I would do whatever I had to, even if I had no one to help me. Never in my life had I felt so alone--so helpless. I stood in the middle of Volterra, struggling not to collapse. I spun around rapidly, searching desperately for a sign. Where the hell did I begin? I felt light-headed, weakened, as the wind whipped my hair around my face. It felt almost as if I would simply fall over dead right at this moment...maybe I could...after this was all over...once he was safe...maybe I could just...die...

But, no. Not yet. I couldn't do anything else until he was safe. I had to concentrate on this--I might not have had his strength, or his speed, or his other abilities...but I had his strong will. The will of refusing to let the one person I love more than anything die. And, I had to force myself to channel the strength of my will into finding him. The strength of my love for him was all I had right now. I had to hold onto it. I couldn't let it go.

All that Alice had told me was that they would start the process immediately, but they would slowly torture him to death. She said he had a maximum of two to three hours before he would be killed. Oh, please, God, don't let me be too late. I was going to find him...I had to.

The parade was continuing on, the people simply ignoring my presence--some going around me, others running into me and stopping to mutter a short apology before continuing on as if nothing was wrong--everyone was laughing, talking, smiling. How could they not know? To them, everything was fine, but they knew nothing. They couldn't know.

Amongst the crowds, hiding in the shadow of an empty, abandoned building, I caught the glimpse of a girl. She was celarly immortal--her beauty far too great to be mortal.

I began to make my way over to her when her crimson red eyes met with mine, confirming my suspicions that she was indeed a vampire. I gasped softly and pushed past the people, going as fast as I could--dodging some, hitting others--not even stopping to apologize, making them shout things in Italian after me.

The girl backed away with a slight smirk, glaring at me in what was supposed to be a threatening, menacing manner, as she backed into the shadows.

I ran even faster, chasing after her. I had to avoid hitting several signs and buildings. I ran into a little girl, knocking her over, but I didn't stop to help her up, making her mother angry, but I completely ignored them, focused on one thing. I had to keep moving or the girl would get away. My only chance of finding him was through her. I couldn't lose her--I couldn't.

I ran through alleys that were so narrow, I could barely fit. I had to turn sideways to get through. I ran into a dumpster and bounced off, hitting the concrete ground, scraping my elbow, as I tried to catch myself.

"Damn it, no!" I yelled, scrambling clumsily to my feet, falling into the side of the dumpster and then pushing myself off of it, running even faster, to keep up with the girl.

A homeless man got in my way, blocking me in, and I gasped, "No! Move! Please!"

He grabbed one of my arms to stop me, so I used my other fist and punched him, making him fall back into the wall.

I tripped over his foot as I began running again, but caught myself on the other wall, and pushed myself off it, running as fast as I possibly could.

I finally halted to a stop at the end of the third alley, and stopped myself by grabbing onto the wall, and I peeked around the corner to see her talking to man--another vampire.

I was trembling as I hid behind the wall, both in fear and exhaustion. Oh, God. Was he dead? Was this man coming to tell her he was? No. Please, oh please, no.

I covered my mouth to stop my heavy breathing, sturggling to hear what they were saying. The music and noise from the parade was deafening, so it was almost impossible to make sense of anything they said. I had to rely on reading their lips, for the most part, which I really sucked at, so even that didn't confirm or deny anything.

"Jane," the man said, "the boy is ready for you. He keeps asking for the worst torture imaginable."

"Aw," Jane purred, in mock disappointment, before her lips curled into a cruel smile, "Good. No one is better to torture than a fool in love...especially, if they're willing to die in place of their loved one. Don't people know it yet: love is much too complicated. Lust is the better emotion for vampires...simply being in the moment..."

She moved in closer to him, "...the...passion," she moved his hair behind his ear, trailing her index finger down the side of his neck, "...it's so...invigorating...the whole 'spur-of-the-moment' deal...carpe diem..."

She pressed her lips to his jawbone, brushing them along the line to his ear, which she sighed into seductively, pressing herself into him.

He trailed his fingertips along her spine down to her waist when she purred, "Hm," and then pulled away abruptly, "Too bad..." she gave him a teasing look, "I'm not in the moment."

"Jane--" he advanced towards her almost irritably, as if this happened quite often.

"Ah, ah, ah, Demetri..." she said, gracefully turning away from him and removing the cover to a man hole. "Ladies first."

Then, she stared down into the man hole looking as if she would actually be his savior rather than the one to take his life away from him. That made me cringe and shudder in horror.

"Don't worry, boy. Soon...all your pain...will be gone...as will you." She leapt down into the man hole, landing gracefully, without a sound.

"Coming Demetri?" She called up.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes, "Women!" Then, he followed her just as swiftly, just as gracefully, as if it was nothing, leaving me all alone.

I forced my legs to move forward, weakly staggering over to the man hole, struggling to not collapse. I covered my mouth with my hands, shaking uncontrollably with fear and pain.

I was walking right into the arms of death and would probably die, as would he. But, I had to try. I might be alone in the fight...but, my strength was directly related to my love for him, which would always be stronger than any power. If I could just save him, I didn't care if I died...it would be for the best cause...and he would live.

All that mattered to me was his safety.

I collapsed, falling into the man hole, but I caught myself on the edge, stifling hysterical sobs, the tears threatening to come. I rested the side of my head against my hands, hating myself for being so weak.

If I could just be a little stronger, imagine what I could do. Maybe if I was a little stronger, he wouldn't have left me. If I was a little stronger, I would have been able to not fall for him. If I was a little stronger, I might have been able to survive without him. If...I was a little stronger...I would be able to save him for once. This was my purpose for staying alive...to ensure his safety.

Then, it hit me: I could be the strongest person...I could be the smartest, the most beautiful, the greatest, but none of that would've changed anything. He still would have left, I still would have fallen for him, I still would have been destroyed from losing him, and I still would've come after him to save him.

No matter what...I would give anything...my heart, my soul, my blood, my existence--they could have whatever they wanted just so long as they let him go and didn't hurt him.

He didn't have to love or want me--I would always love and want him. It was an inevitable necessity for me to love him. I could never survive without him again...I had almost died once from losing him, but his death...the permanent loss..would, without a doubt, kill me. I would be dead before the Volturi could have the chance to cause me any pain.

This was my chance. I could no longer be the damsel in distress...he needed me to be strong...and I would do it. I would find in me the necessary strength to defeat his demons and give him his life back.

Wasn't this what I had wanted all along? To play the role of his heroine. As impossible as that would be, I had to try. I would never be enough for him and I had accepted that. But, I just might be enough to save him at least. I closed my eyes tightly, clenched my teeth, stiffened up, and allowed myself to drop down the hole, into the dark abyss, which closed in on me, consuming me.