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One Fateful Afternoon

Summary:
It started out as any other day at the Cullen house, until the most unexpected person shows up. (WARNING! Laughter ahead!)


Notes:


1. One Fateful Afternoon

Rating 5/5   Word Count 476   Review this Chapter

It started out as any other day at the Cullen house: Alice was talking about clothes, Rosalie was pretending to listen, Emmett was picking his nose, and Jasper was getting annoyed by Edward and Bella sitting on the couch muttering “I love you”, “I love you more”, “No, I love you more” , “No, I love you more” , “No, I love….” And so on and so forth.

Then suddenly Alice gasped seeing something in the future. Then suddenly Edward gasped seeing what Alice saw. Then suddenly the doorbell rang. Then suddenly, Bella jumped up to answer it. Then suddenly, Edward shouted, “NO, BELLA! DON’T!!”

But, sadly, it was far too late. Bella had already opened the door.

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.

There, standing in the doorway, with pale white skin, blood red eyes, and a complete lack of personal hygiene, was none other than… Mike Newton!!!

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.

“Not Mike Newton! Anyone but Mike Newton!!!” Emmett screamed and ran out the back door.

“Run!” Rosalie screamed and ran out the back door.

“Help!” Jasper screamed and ran out the back door.

“AAHHHH!!” Alice screamed and ran out the back door.

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.

“Yes, Bella… it is me! I am a vampire! I have come to suck your blood!” Mike Newton exclaimed.

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.

“Uhhh… Mike Newton…” Edward said, “Sorry to burst your bubble, but I’m, like, standing right here. You wouldn’t even get close, ‘cuz, like, you know, I’d stop you, ‘cuz I’m like super strong, and like, super smart, and like, super, dashingly, amazingly, awesomely handsome... sooo… that’s like three times as super than you. ‘Cuz you’re, like, not any of that.”

“Oh… oh well….” Mike Newton shrugged. “Oh! Hey! Bella! Will you go on a date with me?”

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.

Dude… Bella’s been, like, my girlfriend for, like, a looong time.” Edward said.

“Oh… really?… huh…” Mike Newton said, “I didn’t know that.”

“Man, even as a vampire you’re like, completely clueless.” Edward stated.

“I am not!” Mike Newton argued, “I am the most observant person ever to walk this earth! I am the ruler of noticing everything! I am the king of observation! I am the … Hey! Edward! I just noticed that you’re a vampire too!!”

“NO DUH!”

Then Carlisle stepped into the room, “Why is Alice, Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper running around the yard screaming ‘AAAHHHHH’? They’re wearing out a path in the lawn and Esme’s getting upset about it.”

“They got scared, ‘cuz, like, Mike Newton showed up and he’s like, a creepy stalker…. So, like, yeah….”

“Oh! Hey, Mike Newton!” Carlisle smiled. “I see you’ve come to the dark-side.”

“Huh?”

“Oh, never mind…. Say! Would you like to join the ‘Official Cullen Coven of Vegetarian Vampires in Forks, Washington’? ”

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.

“Yes,” Mike Newton replied. “I would love to join the ‘Official Cullen Coven of Vegetarian Vampires in Forks, Washington’!”

“NOOOOOO!!!” Bella screamed in terror.