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Cries of a Dead Heart

Summary:
She lost her meaning for life.
Everything has gone so wrong in her life, lately.
When she meets the Cullens can they help her find a meaning to live, and even a family?
Or will she find love in all the wrong places? I have a majority of this story writtenthe more reviews I get the faster the next chapters will go up :]


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“Edward, what did Alice see?” she asked, like she didn’t even want to know the answer.
I don’t think I really wanted to know either.
The whole room, including me went into shock at the sound of one word.

“Wolves” he whispered.
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Banner made by yours truly "] (that would be me)

ATTENTION: I am very excited to announce that i am done with this story "]
as soon as it is all posted i will be up in the 10 longest stories
EXCITING
Anyhoo I am starting the sequel
It's called 'Healing a Dead Heart'
the only way you will get it is if you REVIEW
thanks "]


Notes:
It starts out slow, but get to reading it, and you'll be wanting more. All of my friends that have read loved it, but refuse to help me finish it. haha


4. No limit...

Rating 0/5   Word Count 3686   Review this Chapter

Nessa cam running down the stairs at a super-human pace.

“I know you aren’t talking about Jacob again” she groaned. We all broke out of our stiff expressions to notice her standing at the foot of the stairs, with her small arms crossed across her chest.

“No, this pack was…” Alice finally spoke “was…different”. Rosalie grew furious.

“You mean to tell me that there are more wolves?” she nearly screamed. Alice nodded meekly. What did she mean ‘different’? Weren’t all werewolves the same? And while we are on the subject…how many freaking wolves are there?

“We honestly had no clue that there were any….outside of the pack in La Push” Edward’s voice was toneless. Like he was waiting for the worst to come. For those beasts to tear through the door, and kill us all were we stand. Just because of me. I am the one putting this family in danger. I need to leave. It’s only hope that if they do get to me first, that they will leave this family alone. Edward grabbed my arm. Why is he stopping me? Didn’t he even know the dangers I just brought down onto him, and his family?

“You aren‘t going anywhere” he forced through his teeth.

“The hell she isn‘t” Rosalie hissed “Edward you have put our family through enough danger in one lifetime. Let her go” Edward shot a glare at her.

“She’s right Edward” I whispered “I can take care of myself, and I don’t want any of you to get hurt, defending me”. If it’s me they want to bad, then that’s what I’ll give them, but I won’t go down without a fight. Edward slung me over his shoulder and walked back over to the other side of the room, throwing me on the couch.

“You. Stay. Here” He said it slowly, but the fierceness in his words was deep and evident.

“Edward, I-”

“NO” He screamed cutting me off. I backed up into the couch. Bella stared shocked at him. Apparently this wasn’t Edward’s usual behavior. He sat down beside me, and I scooted farther to the opposite side of the couch. I hated to admit it, but he was scaring the crap out of me. Bella came over to my other side and sat on the arm of the couch. She place one hand on my arm, and I looked up to her. She was apparently the comforter for all intent and purposes. She was trying to make all of these new things to me, not freak me out, but I didn’t think she could stop them entirely.

“Edward is just stressed” she explained “He feels very protective over his family, and you are now a part of it’ I nodded.

“I can understand….I guess” I mumbled “But what are we going to do about the wolves?”. Rosalie jumped up from beside Emmett.

“We?!” she nearly screamed “You can not and will not put my family in danger”. Edward shot a dark look.

“C.J. is now a part of this family, and we will keep her safe” he hissed. I was taken back in complete shock. I had never heard anyone stand up for me like that. Well except for…

“C.J. you don‘t understand” Edward looked from his folded hand back to my face. “Your story is so much like Bella‘s that I…Everytime I look at you I see someone else‘s Bella. I see what kind of pain I would have gone through…I see so much of her in you” Oh wow.

I never expected that. That I was to Jared, what Bella was to him. He understood that much about us, by just hearing my story. Bella walked around to couch and placed herself in his lap.

“Edward you are such a softy sometimes” she whispered “But I love that”. He smiled and wrapped his arms around her. The amount of love I could feel radiating from them made me feel uncomfortable. It saddened me that I would never have that thought again. I would never have love again.

“Edward. Bella.” Jasper pulled them out of their ‘moment’. They looked up confused, and Edward slipped Bella out of his lap to sit next to him. Jasper was felling how it saddened me to watch that intensity of love. I gave him a grateful glance and he nodded. I jumped up from the couch, and turned to face Edward.

“Look I need to go get my things” I paused to pick out the right words “If you are going to want me to stay here, then I need some clothes, and my books”. He nodded and stood.

“Where are your books?” He asked I shot him a glare. What did he think he was up to? Was he trying to keep me here instead of letting me come, and get my stuff myself? Ha. No. I’m coming.

“On my bed….but you don‘t know what clothes to get” I said satisfied. He had to let me come then. I looked at him, but expression didn’t change.

“Emmett and I will go and get your books” he stopped and pointed to Alice “Alice will be more than happy to make you look stunning for school”. Oh he is good. Very good.

Alice squealed, jumping up and down, clapping her hands. Bella leaned over towards me.

“She loves doing this kind of thing if you can’t tell” she whispered so low nobody could have heard it, but us.

“Yay this is going to be so much fun” Alice squealed. I sunk back into the couch, covering my face with my hands. This is going to be a nightmare. I really hope she doesn’t alter my appearance that much. She printed over to the couch and grabbed my arm.

“Come on” she whined.

“Alice, school is in the morning” I moaned looking up at her cheery face.

“If you haven’t noticed, silly, it is the morning” I noticed that I hadn’t even realized how early it was. I looked at the clock in the back of the room, it was four o’clock in the morning. The sun wasn’t even up yet. How long was this makeover gonna last. I switched my focus to see Edward and Emmett pulling out of the driveway in my Mercedes. So I was beaten. I sighed and gave myself over to Alice. She dragged me upstairs, and threw outfit after outfit at me trying to get me to pick one. I honestly didn’t care what I wore. I was mostly concerned she would force me into some cheery bright clothes that I would have never worn. I finally picked one that we both agreed on, when I heard my car pull back into the driveway. It was my favorite colors. It wasn’t too cheery, but on the border line. However compared to the other outfits, this was the best I was gonna get away with.

“Alice no. Anything but pink please” I moaned. She was dangling a pair of strappy heel in front of my face. They had the colors of my outfit in them, but also pick. Pink is just too happy for me.

“You will wear these shoes, because they are the only pair I have to match that outfit” I couldn’t exactly tell if the bitterness in her voice was to do with the fact that it was the only pair of shoes she had for that outfit, or that I wanted to mix colors. She was a vicious little thing. I grabbed the shoes and slid them on.

“There Alice are you happy now?” I asked.

“Very” she beamed “Now sit still”. She was moving on to the make-up part. She didn’t do much to my intense relief, but enough to make me feel different. She had me in a pair of worn-out looking jeans, she called them distressed (whatever) they were True Religion, and apparently I was taking it too extreme that I was in a three-hundred dollar pair of jeans.

“THERE H-HOW MUCHH?!” Alice backed away, and gave me a confused stare.

“C.J. if you haven’t noticed I dress my family in only the best” she replied like this was nothing but a spare pair of jeans sitting in the back of her closet. If my parents had even had the money to buy me a pair of jeans worth this much I would have locked them in an iron vault, I sighed and started to unbutton them. Alice grabbed my hand and zipped them back up.

“Alice” I groaned “I can‘t wear these. What would happen if I ruin them, and with my luck I can almost guarantee that I will”. She laughed at my apparent naïveness.

“You will wear these jeans” she said, as if she thought that would end my discomfort. I sighed. At least I liked the top. It was a canary yellow v-neck halter top, with a lime green camisole underneath. I hated to admit it, but I looked good. It brought out the gold tints in my eyes. But the shoes. Oh god those shoes. I wish I could rip them up and burn them.

Alice was extremely happy with her final piece. She grabbed my hand, and dragged me down the stairs.

“I would like you to meet the new and improved C.J.” Nobody was in the living room, but Bella. As soon as she hopped up the rest of the family came piling in. There were shocked expressions, and gasps. I didn’t think I looked that different.

“Wow C.J. you look HOTT” I heard Emmett. Rosalie slapped the back of his head, then turned to me, and surprisingly smiled.

“”You look great C.J.” Rosalie said “Almost as good as me”. I couldn’t help but laugh at that.

“Thanks” I smiled. This is going to be quite an amusing day at school. I saw Edward in the back laugh and nod.

Edward drove me and Nessa to school. We talked, surprisingly became good friends really fast. At least I have one friend today. She was kind, and very smart. She showed me her power. It was very emotional for me. She showed me myself, last night, during my breakdown. I looked horrible. My guilt for putting Jasper through that too, tripled. I could comprehend every emotion that passed through my face. Sorrow, anger, pain, and the most powerful was loss.

“Nessa” Edward called from the front seat “I don‘t think she really needs to see that”. Nessa didn’t understand, but turned and saw the twisted expression on my face. Her face twisted in horror.

“C.J. I’m so sorry” she groaned, grabbing me in a hug. I hugged her back, when she turned off the vision.

“I was just trying to show you my power” she explained “I honestly wasn’t thinking”

“It‘s ok Nessa”

We pulled up to the school, only minutes after leaving the house. I was so nervous, as to how people were going to react to my new look. Nessa grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the car. I heard the Volvo speed off behind me, and several gasps. They were all very surprised by my new look, and it clearly showed in every single face. Their stares and glares were enough to make me want to go climb under a rock and never come out. The small girl, I remembered from yesterday, as Karen came running toward us. Her eyes widened when she took in my new appearance.

“Oh” she said stopping in front of us “I see you are already friends”. I smiled. Hopefully she wouldn’t mention my clothes. Nessa laughed.

“Yeah” she said “we are a lot alike”. Karen seemed appeased that we were friends.

“So C.J. what‘s with the new look?” Karen asked eyeing my clothes. I knew this was coming. I pulled at the hem of Alice’s shirt, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. I didn’t need to give her a full explanation so I only gave her one word.

“Makeover” I mumbled. They both laughed at me.

“Ah, so you‘ve met Alice” I shot my head up. She knew Alice? Nessa saw the confusion on my face.

“Karen, has met my family, yes” she sighed “She was my only friend. Everyone else thinks I’m odd”. Ha yeah if they only knew how odd we really were.

I slung my purse over my shoulder and fled the little get together, because I was about to be late to class. When I walked in the room everyone, and even the teacher did double takes. If I could have, I definitely would have blushed. My Latiner called me up to his desk and gave me a book list, and a literature book. I accidentally brushed my hand against, and he jumped back at the temperature of my skin. He grabbed his hand and shook it violently, like I had just pour acid on him. I new my skin was cold to humans, but he was just overreacting. I went back to my desk to study this list. It had all the basics. Emily Bronte, Shakespeare, and Jane Austen I knew immediately. The others I was sure Bella would have, and lend to me.

“You look different” It was the boy next to me, Zack. Good maybe he would stop trying to hit on me.

“I don‘t see that as a bad thing” I whispered.

“Oh it isn’t” Dang. Hopes smashed. I grabbed um my list and went over it again trying to block out his attempts to get my attention. Mr. Latiner thankfully called the class to attention at that time. I pretended to be listening intently on what he was saying, to keep Zack from trying to talk to me. When the bell finally rang, I grabbed my books. I thought with you know me all super fast I would get out of there before he cornered me. Nope.

He was standing right in front of me when I sat back up from getting my books from the ground.

AHHHH HELP ME!

I noticed the twisted expression on his face as anxiety. Great. Alice is going to get it when I get back to the house.

“I was just wondering if maybe…your...free this weekend” He mumbled.

“Sorry I’m married” he looked confused. I realized my mistake.

I could have pulled something like no I’m seeing someone, or I have plans, but no. Stupid, stupid me. I tell him the truth. Well maybe he’ll think I’m crazy and leave me alone.

“I-I mean” I came up with the best cover story I could think of “I‘m seeing someone….I’m going to be…married…soon”. he looked at me skeptically, like I was lying. But I kinda was, so I guess I shouldn’t be too offended. I’ve never been a good liar.

“To who?” The only think I could think was ‘wow nosy much?’. I sighed. Here it goes.

“Ok. I’m not, but I really do have plans this weekend….I just….I’m not stable enough right now to be in a relationship” he understood that.

“Just get out of a bad one?” he asked sympathetically. If only he knew how great that relationship was. I squeezed my eyes shut, and sucked in a deep breath.

“Something like that” I whispered “I have to go”. I ran out of the classroom not caring what people saw. If I could cry I would have looked as horrible as I felt. Nessa was standing outside of the classroom, waiting for me. When she saw the mess I was becoming she grabbed me and wrapped me in a hug.

“Do you want me to call my dad?” she whispered. There really wasn’t anywhere I wanted to be, but there. I nodded and she pulled me around to side of the building. She grabbed out her phone, hit a button, and put it to her ear.

“Hey Dad” she turned her voice all sugary “I don’t think that C.J. is going to make it through the rest of the-….yes, I know that….But, you don‘t see what a mess she is right now….If she could she would be…..I‘m not sure what was said……she looks like she did last night….Ok I‘ll see you…Love you too Daddy” She snapped the phone shut, and slipped it back in to her purse.

“It’s all going to be ok C.J. ” She gripped my shoulders as if trying to beat that into me. I nodded. How bad did I look? I didn’t think I was that obvious when it came to talking about something uncomfortable. She slumped down into the grass and patted the spot next to her. I sat down and she leaned her head on my shoulder. She felt so warm, sometimes it’s hard to believe she isn’t human. She startled me when she sat up suddenly and snatched her phone back out of her bag. She punched in a number and put it to her ear. She looked…almost nervous.

“Hey Jake” Now I see why. “Will you come over later?”….No they aren’t mad at you” I was seriously thinking of listening in, but I knew if it was of any importance Nessa would tell me. Just because I have issues with him didn’t mean everybody else had to.

“JACOB BLACK!” I never heard her scream like that “You will not talk about my family like that…..All of the Cullens are my family…..I was born into it, do you think I really-…..fine…..No Jacob, I’m not…..I just wanted to tell you that-….. Ok stop interrupting me…..I wanted to tell you that there are more….well of you….that‘s not funny, you know what I mean….There are more wolves….I was going to tell you later, but you said you weren’t coming over……No. C.J. isn’t leaving….ok I‘ll see you tonight…..I still love you too”. She chuckled snapping her phone shut.

“I suppose should have waited to tell him, but he was being so stubborn” she sighed, and leaned back into the grass. Minutes later we heard the Volvo pull up into the street. Edward jumped out and ran to us. Eager much? Nessa hopped up and met him half way with a hug. This is a very hugging family. They walked over to were I sat.

“C.J. what happened?” he asked sounding some-what of an overly-obsessed worried parent. I stood up to let him see that I am perfectly fine.

“This isn’t about C.J. but umm dad” he turned to face her “Jake said that he had no idea there were …others. He‘s coming over tonight, and we are going to take him to her house to see if he recognizes any scent”. He nodded and I felt relief sweep over me. That’s what they were talking about on the phone…now it made sense.

“I’m perfectly fine Edward I just got a little emotional when this guy asked me out and I had to come up with a cover off the top of my head” he understood, but the look on Nessa’s face said she didn’t.

“I couldn’t exactly tell him I’m a widow, Nessa” I could feel the pained expression wipe over my face. I clutched my left shoulder with my right arm, to make sure that a chunk of me really hadn’t been vacuumed out, like it felt. Edward grabbed my arm and hoisted me toward the car.

“C.J. you are in no condition to be in school” he said as he sat in the driver’s seat. Nessa hopped in the back and let me have the front. We didn’t talk the whole way home. I just sat and counted the trees as they went by. Anything that would distract me from previously. When we got the house, I felt strange….almost if we were being watched.

“C.J. when was the last time you hunted?” Edward asked looking directly at me. Why was he asking such strange questions? I hunted just yesterday….what could make him look at me like that?

“Umm a few hours before I ran into Emmett” I answered. He looked around confused. Nessa twisted to look at what was making her dad act so strangely. And jumped back.

“C.J. why are your eyes black?” Nessa asked horrified. I flipped down the passenger mirror above me, and sure enough my eyes were pitch black. But why? I wasn’t thirsty at all. I just hunted yesterday. What the hell is going on with me?

“I‘m not sure” Edward answered my thoughts….again. I flung open the door of the Volvo, and hopped out. Nessa was just two strides behind me when I ran in the house. Carlisle was standing at the edge of the stairs, like he knew what was coming. I strode up next to him.

“Carlisle why are my eyes so dark?” I asked him. He smiled liked I was being silly to ask him this question.

“You’re thirsty dear” he said slowly.

“No. Carlisle I hunted yesterday” the same confused expression that Edward had, came over Carlisle’s face too. He gripped the banister so tightly it broke into splinters at his fingers. Esme ran in the living room, her tiny face twisted in anguish.

“Not my banister…Carlisle…what’s wrong with you? You‘ve never done anything like this”. Esme ran to my side and stared at her distant husband.

She twisted her head to look at me, to try to find the problem, and gasped.

“Sweetheart you need to hunt” she said grabbing my arm “..NOW”. I shook my arm out of her grasp.

“I’m honestly not thirsty at all Esme” she looked confused. She turned and walked up the stairs and I heard a door shut softly. Edward came in just then and twisted me around quickly to face him.

“Did you touch any human at all today?” he asked, his voice kicking up a notch. I thought back to today. The only class I had actually gone to was literature. I didn’t remember touching anyone. But I did. It came back to me. When I accidentally brushed against the teacher and he freaked out like that. Edward nodded listening to my thoughts.

“C.J. I think your power maybe a little more strange than we all thought” Both of their heads snatched up in unison, and Carlisle looked confused,

“What do you mean Edward?” Carlisle asked.

“I mean it seems her power has no limits” I drew in ragged breath, and asked what was currently going through my head.

“My body is trying to develop the characteristics of a human?”.

He let out a deep ‘whoosh’ and looked as if he really didn’t want to answer the question. How could he keep something like this from me?

Edward! I know you can hear me. Tell me right now. AM I RIGHT?!

He nodded.