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Live This Life

Summary:
Sequel to I Need You to Love Me. It is strongly recommended that you read that first or else you won't know half the characters. She doesn't own a dress, and her hair is always a mess. If you catch her stealing, she won't confess. She's beautiful. Here she is again on the phone. Just like me, she hates to be alone. We just like to sit at home. Well she wants to live her life, then she thinks about her "life". Pulls her hair back as she screams, "I don't really wanna be the queen, I--I don't really wanna live this life.


Notes:
Well she wants to be the queen, and she thinks about her scene. Wells she wants to live her life, and she thinks about her life. Pulls her hair back as she screams, "I don't really want to be the queen. I don't really want to live this life." As always, it belongs to SM, except for the summary. those are the lyrics to change your mind by all-american rejects.


4. Chapter 4--Cry

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Chapter Four--

It had almost been too easy. That was why she was so apprehensive. Gia was sure that somehow, he would know that she was leaving, and that he would track her down before she got a chance to leave the country. Once she hit America, she was home free. She sat in the terminal for hours, clutching her carry on bag, continuously scanning the bustling crowd. Finally, they began to board children and handicapped passengers. She barely managed to squeeze by as a child.

Mistress was kind enough to by her two seats so that she would not be disturbed by an intrusive tourist. She sat, clutching her carry on for dear life. She concentrated on breathing, and not looking suspicious. That was the last thing that she needed. Never before had it taken so long to board a plane. At least, the stewardesses were kind to her. One even brought her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It was tasty, but not nearly as good as the ones that Alec had made for her.

Alec. That was painful enough for her to double over. She missed him already. It felt like they had been apart decades, not just a few days. They had said their goodbyes before he had left for England, but those were short and she was still somewhat angry. They were not indefinite goodbyes. That might have been what hurt the most. There would not be any closure of this chapter of her life; it would simply end, and there was nothing for her to remember it, no nostalgia. She wanted to cry herself to sleep. She missed him so much that it physically hurt. She was beginning to regret her insistence to leave without him. He would make it all be better. It was only through the reminder that he would suffer to watch her die and she would suffer watching him fall out of love with her that kept her going. She was leaving for both herself and Alec. It was for the best. That was her mantra.

Eventually, the plane took off. She did not allow herself the reprieve of sleep. She had to stay on watch. Alec was sly and crafty, if anyone tracked her down, it would be him. After seventeen hours of constant alertness, paranoia set in. Gia started fantasizing him popping up out of the blue and forcing her to go back to Voltera. Though fairly sure her mate would not force her to go back to certain death, he did have a vindictive side. Coupled with his pride and her promise to never run away again, Alec was going to be furious when they met up again. No, no, she corrected herself. There would be no when. At the most, it was an if. Even then, she hoped their chances of reuniting were slimmer.

The tiniest plane that Gia had ever seen arrived in Manteo a little after eight in the morning, standard time. Exhausted to the fullest extent, she fumbled her way out of customs and somehow managed to get to claims. The paranoia had yet to leave, so as soon as she had her one bag, she left the airport as swiftly as possible without drawing attention to herself. Logic told Gia to find a motel room for the night and then head up the mountains to Myth the following morning. Yet she was still sure that Alec would appear any moment with the intent to drag her back to Italy, so that was not a viable option. With a loud sigh, she focused as she prayed that for just an hour or two she would be able to revert back to a vampiric state. If she could, she could find Myth, explain her problem and get refuge.

“Please, Lord,” she whispered. “Let it work,”

Grabbing the silverly threads of her power--threads that had grown weaker and weaker, and harder and more difficult to locate and use effectively with each passing minute, she shoved her humanity out of her body with all of her might. Glancing down, she would have cried if possible upon seeing her milk white skin. Another problem presented itself. It was sunny and bright out in Manteo. Hoping that she was still super fast, Gia bolted. She zigzagged in between people and cars, over fences and dogs until she reached the outskirts of town. Not even stopping, she headed off to the looming Appalachians. Her mistress was correct. The mountain range was ginormous. It would take a miracle for her to find Myth.

She took off running up the mountain faster than eye could see. Without warning, she hit a wall of pain that left her on the ground, seizing in pain. This was it, she thought, this could perhaps be the last time she was ever a vampire.

The phone rang loudly. Bella Cullen groaned as she pulled away from her perfect husband. Edward’s eyes danced with pleading, begging her let it go to voicemail. If it had been any other number, Bella regretfully sighed, she probably would have done just that. “Hello?” she said into the shinny red phone as Edward let out a guttural groan.

“Hey, Izzie. Listen, I need a favor,”

The pain subsided sometime later. Gia was not quite sure how long she had lay on the dirty rocks, screaming and writhing. Slowly, she sat up, panting. That was more painful that the transformation. She hoped that that was the first and last episode, even if it came at the expense of her loosing her vampiric nature.

She smelled awful. Sweat pouring off of her had made her clothes cling to her skin. Dirt and mud caked to her face and shirt, making it look as if she had walked all the way from Volterra. Cuts and scrapes littered her body, though how they got there was a mystery to her. She ran a hand through her now loose hair only to wince as she pulled on several rats. Standing up to alleviate the growing tension in her clamped muscles, it was a struggle to even lift her bags. Refusing to leave them behind, she pulled as hard as she could, literally dragging the bag up the mountain.

Her human eyes scanned the terrain. As far as the eye could see lay rocks, moss, dirt and trees. She groaned. How on earth was she going to find this hidden city. She had packed no food or water. The human body could exist three days without water, and two weeks without food. She would have cried if she did not have the sense to preserve what little water was stored in her body. Resolutely, she began to walk forward. She would not give up; giving up was weak and shameful. That was something that she refused to be. She was stronger than that.

If she were a vampire, she could have at least survived on the local wildlife until she found Myth. The weak thoughts were banished as soon as they were thought. A smack against her grubby cheek was the reprimand to remind herself that there would be no more weakness. Gia would try to embrace vampirism as soon as she had more strength. Then and there she was too exhausted to even think about trying.

To pass the time, she started to sing as she pulled her luggage along. That way, she could focus on something besides sleep and if someone from Myth happened to be near, they could help her. Disney songs were always her favorite.

As she methodically went through the songs from the Little Mermaid, she noted familiar landmarks to make sure that she did not go around in circles. Originally, she thought that walking straight would prevent that, but as she started having to zigzag around trees and circumvent longs and rivers, she knew that not getting lost was nearly impossible.

She cried whenever she finished the Little Mermaid and the sun had yet to move from its spot in the sky. After a few minutes of that, she smacked herself again and went on, this time, singing songs from the Hunchback of Notre Dame. They were longer and more entertaining. She was in the refrain of God Help the Outcasts whenever the pain came again.

Though his silence led Alec to believe that he had sided with his wife, Master Marcus acted as though he thought otherwise. The day after he had returned from England, he found a receipt for two tickets purchased for Manteo. At first, he failed to recognize the significance, suspecting that this was his Master’s way of telling him that Marcus and Emaelia would be going to America to visit. It was only when he saw that they were one way did he realize that Lady Emaelia had purchased his Gia two tickets to America.

Two days after that, Marcus told Alec that he wanted him to locate a book called Mythology in the Americas for him by Pizzarro. Again, Alec did not realize the significance until, as he was glancing through it, he read about the Fountain of Youth and and Daniel Boone’s involvement in building a city around it. Pizzarro landed in America a hundred years before Boone was even born. Alec took the hint and read the thick, dusty volume.

It was one of the most boring things he had ever read. Dry and humorless, it could have put all of the many, many…many myths into a condensed volume, but the author--and Pizzarro was obviously a pseudonym--felt the need to be outrageously prolific. For the life of him, Alec could not wrap his mind around it all. What was Master Marcus trying to tell him? It was not as if he could walk up to the sullen vampire and ask him outright. Not only would that be an abuse of station and blatant crudeness, but Mistress Emaelia always seemed to be at Marcus’s side, watching with beady eyes to make sure that there was nothing underhanded going on the threatened Gia’s location. Of all the times for the bubbly vampire to become withdrawn!

Looking down at his watch, he wondered for the thousandth time why she left him. She should have known that he was completely and totally in love with he. She held his heart in her hands, whether she was a human or not, he only existed for her! Alec was not a creature to be considered eloquent, but surely she knew how precious she was to him? Surely she could tell from the way his eyes always linger on her face, loving this woman who grew more beautiful to him each passing day, from the way she could entice him with just a single smile, and from the way he was able to rouse her passion to a fevered pitch. Surely the depth of his feelings for her was plainly evident ever since their first intimate moment with each other.

Alec often mocked himself. For some unknown reasons, he did inadvertently and inexplicably accumulate baggage during his life despite his icy demeanor and ruthless reputation. And behold, one of them a frail human female, helpless and powerless…the lowest of the low. But ironically, she seemed to be the only creature who did not fear him in any ways despite her obviously inferior status. She was the only creature who did not hesitate to walk beside him, innocently proclaiming it as her right, and yet furthermore amazingly, he had not discouraged her. It was as though his mind had unconsciously recognized her worth as his equal. She was the only one who had ever managed to hold her own in his presence and yet was still alive and flourishing in spite of it.

She had made him feel so much that he ached with the want to keep her safe and …. yes, cherished. In his darkest moods, he railed against the fates that had put her on his path. Perhaps he should have maintained his non-involvement philosophy concerning humans. But then again, he would have missed out on the opportunity of being with her. It was enough for him to know the path his heart would always have chosen regardless of circumstances. It did not seem to be enough for her; his heart broke in two.

Gia wondered around for two days, blindly searching for myth. She slept uncomfortably at night on the hard ground, never dozing off for more than a few minutes before a sound jerked her back to abrupt alertness. Her entire body ached. She was scratched and bruised. Pain wracked her body, but she could not tell if it was from the detranformation or if it was just from the pain of walking for days. Her mouth and eyes were dry--her body was pulling water back to her core, giving her the little extra bit she needed to push on, to find Myth. She was close now, she could feel it. Just another day and she believed with all of her heart that she would find the city, she would find freedom.

Her positive thoughts did nothing for her as she collapsed on the ground, unable to move on the fourth day of roaming. Blackness crept upon her and she did not have the strength to refute it. She felt so bad that she welcomed death.

How weak.