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Alone

Summary:
ALL HUMAN. What if Edward Cullen isn't the good guy all the time? Bella is Pregnant and Edward refuses to accept it.


Notes:
Just a little story I wrote. Hope you all like it.


20. Chapter 20

Rating 5/5   Word Count 1697   Review this Chapter

Bella POV

I couldn't think.

I couldn't breathe.

I couldn't move.

"Bella?"

"I'm sorry, what did you say," I asked shaking my head and quickly blinking.

"Bella I asked you to marry me."

"Jake..."

"It's okay, Bella. If you need time to think, I understand."

"It's not that. I just..."

"What? You can tell me," he said as he stood.

"I just don't know. I mean, do I want to be with you? Yes."

"Then what is it?"

I didn't quite know how to explain it. My thought immediately went to Edward. What would he say? Or the rest of the Cullen's for that matter. I knew Charlie and Rebecca would be happy. But the real question is, would I be happy?

"Can I think about it?"

I saw Jake's face drop. I knew I hurt him.

"Sure."

"Jake, please don't be mad."

"I'm not."

"Yes you are. I can tell."

"I would rather you say yes and have a long engagement, than..."

"Than what? I'm not saying no."

"Then say yes. I don't mind waiting until you're ready, as long as you say yes. I just want to know that one day you'll be my wife."

I stood there, looking into his eyes and I saw it. I saw myself standing next to him in my dress as his wife; I saw Maddy and Masen playing with their brothers and sisters that would come one day; I saw myself happy.

I may not have said it to Jake, but I did love him. The thought of saying it out loud had always scared me, because I said it to Edward shortly before I became pregnant and he hurt me. Those three words were too powerful to say to just anyone and I hadn't spoken them since that night with Edward. I wanted to say it to Jake, several times now since he said it to me, but I just couldn't get it out.

"Then...yes, Jake. I will marry you."

With that, Jake slipped the ring on my finger and kissed me. Our happy moment was interrupted when Charlie and Rebecca came home.

"Hey kids," Charlie said.

Jake rested his forehead on mine.

"I love you more than you know," he whispered.

"I love you, too," I whispered back.

There. I said it. I put it out there. I knew I didn't have to worry about Jake hurting me. I don't think he had a mean bone in his body, actually.

"Honey, I think they want some privacy," Rebecca said.

"No, it's okay. I need to put Maddy down, anyway," I said.

"I"ll do it," Rebecca said. "It'll be good practice for me, anyway."

"What," Charlie asked.

"You heard me," Rebecca said picking up Maddy.

"Are you," Charlie asked as Rebecca walked past him.

"Yes!"

"When did you find out," Charlie asked.

"Just today. I'm not that far along, but it came back positive."

Rebecca was completely glowing. Jake and I stood in the middle of the living room gazing into each other's eyes while Charlie and Rebecca took Maddy to bed. Some day soon, I was going to be Mrs. Jacob Black. For the first time, the thought didn't scare me.

The next morning, I awoke to a half empty bed and my cell phone ringing.

"Hello," I quietly said.

"Bella, sorry to wake you," Jake said.

"It's okay. How's Billy?" When Jake didn't answer, I knew. Billy had finally passed. "Jake, do you want me to come over?" Again, he couldn't answer me. I could hear him quietly crying on the other end. "Give me an hour and I'll be there."

"Al..Alright," he finally said.

I quickly got up, dressed, made the twins their morning bottles and stuck a note on the fridge letting them know what happened and where I'd be. When I got to Jake's house on the reservation, he was sitting on the steps waiting for me. I could see his sister inside pacing back and forth and talking on her cell phone. There were a few cars parked by the house as well, and I assumed these were close friends of Billy's. I walked over to Jake and stood in front of him. He rested his head on my stomach, wrapped his arms around my waist and started sobbing. All I could do was let him. I knew he hadn't done this since his move back to Forks, and now all of his stress, anguish and sadness was finally coming to a head. When he finally stopped and released his grip somewhat, I sat on his lap and put my arms around his broad shoulders. None of us said anything at first.

"Are you okay," I finally asked.

"Better now, thank you."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"No. Once the elders arrive, you'll have to leave. They're very protective of our customs. But if you could sit with me tonight, while I wait for his spirit to pass, I'd appreciate it."

"His spirit to pass," I asked.

"Yes. Our people believe that if there is no one with the body, the soul could get lost and not find its way."

"How long does it take?"

"It varies. Could you be here by seven?"

"Sure. Just let me make arrangements for the twins. What should I tell Charlie if he asks to come over?"

"Tell him we're planning a memorial afterwards. He can come then."

I sat with him for a little while longer, until the tribal elders arrived, then headed over to the Cullen's. I walked in and found they were all already awake and scattered throughout the house. Alice, of course, was on the computer doing her usual Sunday shopping.

"Where's Edward," I asked Carlisle, who was in the kitchen making coffee.

"Upstairs, why?"

"I just need to talk to him, that's all."

"Kind of early, isn't it?"

"Yeah, sorry."

"It's okay. Go on up."

"Thanks."

As I walked into the living room, I made sure my left hand was in my pocket. I didn't want to give anything away just yet. I could hear Edward's stereo softly playing as I tapped on the door.

"Come in," I heard him say.

When I walked in, I found him sitting on his couch, writing in what looked like a journal.

"Hey, do you have a minute," I asked closing the door behind me.

"Sure."

Edward sat his journal down and turned off the stereo. I leaned against the far wall and searched for the best way to tell him about Jake and I.

"What's up," he asked.

"Edward, I want.. no, I need to tell you something. No one else knows yet and I felt it would be better to tell you first."

"...Okay..."

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

"Jacob proposed last night," I quietly said.

"Oh," Edward replied.

I could hear his heart shatter into a million pieces. I knew I had hurt him deeply. But if I didn't tell him straight out, or if I let him find out through his family, it would hurt even more. After a few minutes the silence was so thick you could cut it with a knife. I desperately wanted to sit next to him and hold his hand; do anything to make his pain go away.

"Edward," I finally said.

"Don't. I'm trying very hard not to loose it here, Bella."

We both sat in silence for a bit longer. Edward's hands were clenched in fists, which was never a good sign. Using the small amount of courage I managed to muster up, I walked over and sat next to him. Edward stood and walked to his window.

"Please say something to me," I begged.

"Leave," he said.

"What?"

"Leave. Get out. Right now."

"Edward, I,-"

"I said go!" he shouted. I stood, but couldn't move. I could feel the tears rolling down my face. Edward turned and looked at me. "GET OUT!"

His tone scared me enough that I was able to run out of his room, down the stairs and out the front door. My heart broke for him, and my mind started filling with doubt.

Edward's POV

My mind was going a mile a minute and my heart was breaking just as fast.

The woman I loved more than anyone was engaged to a man whom she barely knows. How dare he!? How dare he swoop in and take her from me!? Bella has always and will always be mine. I didn't care what the cost was, I would find a way to get her back in my arms where she belongs.

I hated him. I hated the way she looked at him; talked to him; touched him. I hated the way he ran his fingers through her hair; kissed her lips; made her smile; made her happy. It should be me doing those things. I made her happy once and damn it, I'll do it again!

From my window I saw Bella standing by her car. I knew she was crying. Maybe there was still time. Maybe I still had a chance. She wouldn't have told me before anyone if he didn't still have feelings for me, right?

Seeing her crying again because of me was wrong. I went downstairs and outside to her. She turned away from me and dried her eyes.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled."

"It's alright," Bella said, her voice cracking.

"No, it's not alright. I realize it probably wasn't the easiest thing to say."

"It wasn't. But you had every right to act like that."

"There's something else bothering you, I can tell." She didn't answer me. "Bella, stop hiding it."

Bella turned around and looked me dead in the eye.

"Billy passed this morning."

Her tears came again. I hated to see her cry. I wasn't sure if she would let me touch her after everything that's happened. The distance between us, while only a few feet, felt like a few hundred miles. I wanted her to bury her face in my chest, and let me whisper to her like I used to. I missed the feel of her next to me; I missed being able to anticipate her next move; I missed seeing that sparkle in her eye that I gave her; I missed seeing her face light up when I walked into the room. I just missed... her.