Shadows of the Sun
"He had always been my friend, from the very beginning. I had always counted on him to be there for me, to catch me when I fell. When Edward had left me the first time, he had been there to erase my pain and to comfort my fears. He had taken away the darkness and disposed of it, replacing it with the sun." Emptiness. The one thing Bella thought she would never feel again - but she did. Edward has left for the second time, and for the same reasons he had before. He backed out of their plan once and for all and has refused to turn her into a living blood-sucking monster. Bella is miserable, and she is positive this time that she'll never again feel the touch of happiness. But with Jake still in her life to patch things up, maybe things won't be so bad after all. Edward may have had the power of an eclipse, but sun can shine through almost anything...including a shattered heart.
This story is set after New Moon, after Edward left and came back, and after she finds out that Jacob is a werewolf. Edward leaves again, maybe in the middle of Elicpse, and Jacob is left to comfort her for the second time...will Bella finally realize just how much Jacob loves her?
3. Fearless In A Storm
Rating 5/5 Word Count 1552 Review this Chapter
And I don't know how it gets better than this
You take my hand and drag me head first, fearless
And I don't know why but with you I'd dance
In a storm in my best dress, fearless
Why was it always so freaking impossible to get rid of?
Muttering silent oaths beneath my breath, I peeled my eyes open and let out a sigh.
"You sigh a lot."
I gasped and sat upright, pressing myself against the bedpost; my cheeks already beginning to flame with heat.
Jacob smirked sheepishly at me from the end of the bed. I wiggled my toes and felt them come into contact with his knee. I glowered at him.
"Jake! What exactly are you doing in my room?"
"Er, Bella, look around."
I did. My eyes widened when I began to gaze at my surroundings, honestly appalled at what I was just beginning to realize.
This was not my room.
This was not my bed.
This was Jacob's room.
And this was Jacob's bed.
What the hell was I doing in both of them?!
I was just about to fling myself from the bed when Jake reached out and stopped me from doing so. I glanced over at him incredulously and he gave me that slow, lazy grin that I knew all too well.
"You can stay, Bells, I don't mind."
"But I do," I said with a roll of my eyes, and hopped up before he could possibly protest. "Listen, I'm really sorry I just came here and..." I blushed and shook my head, "Anyway, I should be going home now, Charlie is probably worried sick about me."
"I called him." Jacob grinned at me and added, "I told him you were conked out on my bed barely breathing."
I stared at him in horror.
He laughed, "Jeez, chill Bells. I only said that you were at our house spending time with us. I was careful not to give him a heart attack."
I glared at him playfully. "You know, you really are a mutt."
"Hey!" He frowned at me, affronted.
"Sorry. I meant to say...dog."
He growled and yanked me to his chest, beginning to give me a noogie. I squealed and hit him repeatedly on his arm. He chuckled and then released me.
"You know, you're just wasting your efforts when you do that."
"I'm not wasting anything," I sniffed, "It's the thought that I intended to hurt you that counts."
Jacob blinked, and then burst out laughing. Between spasms, he clutched me tighter and murmured against my ear, "I've missed you, Bells."
I poked his shoulder. "Yeah, well...I've missed you too...occasionally."
He stiffened within my embrace. I giggled and pushed him away so that he could see my grinning face, "I'm kidding. I've missed you too, Jake."
He slowly smiled at me, and then tucked a strand of my chocolate brown hair behind my ear, "So...what do you want to do?"
"Hmm..." I tilted my head to the side, considering, "How about a walk on the beach?"
His face brightened instantly, and a grin split across his face.
"Sweet deal. Come on, the sun is about to set. If we get there in time we won't miss it."
I gasped, "How long have I been asleep?"
"The entire day. Hey, don't look so freaked out. You needed the rest after exhausting yourself last night, and besides, you still have the whole night yet to come." He ruffled my hair reassuringly and began to lead me out of the room.
I let him, feeling truly baffled. I had never slept so much in all my life, not since that day when I had come back from Volterra after a long plane flight and a long car ride home...all instances of when I had been in Edward's arms.
I grimaced, the piercing sadness that I still possessed washing over me with the full force and strength of a tidal wave. I leaned against Jacob, grasping his arm as all of my depressing thoughts from last night filled my troubled mind.
And then came Jacob's deep, concerned voice, hovering right next to my ear.
"Bella? Bella are you all right? C'mon, please don't start this again..."
I gulped and sucked in a mouthful of air. "Sorry," I mumbled, shaking my head and trying to clear my thoughts. "I didn't mean..."
"Stop saying sorry, damnit," Jacob muttered crossly, swinging the front door open and pushing me gently outside. "You have no fucking right to feel sorry about anything...about leaping out your window, sleeping in my bed, or even, damnit, Edward leaving. None of it is your fault, so just shut the hell up about it, all right?"
I turned around, feeling on the verge of tears again. But this time, I held them back, I was tired of crying, tired of having to explain myself, and fuck it, I was even more tired of having to say I was sorry.
"Fine," I muttered, whipping back around and marching down the porch steps and towards the beach. I felt his hand grab my wrist and I swung around, glaring at him.
"You're happy, aren't you?" I yelled at him, my best friend, who through it all never once complained about my idiotic behavior, "You're happy that Edward is gone and that you get to be the only man in my life, aren't you? Just admit it; I know you feel that way."
Jake looked incredibly pained and also incredibly pissed as he cupped my face with both of his hands and tilted my head so that I had no other choice but to stare into his warm, compassionate eyes. "Bells, how could you even think that? Sure, I'm happy that the bloodsucker is gone, but only because he made you so unhappy, Bells...no, don't look at me like that. I know you wouldn't believe it for a second, but it's true. You're so much more beautiful when he's gone from you, Bella. So much more..." he trailed off and brushed his thumb against my cheek, "You," He finished, and smiled into my eyes.
I snorted and slapped his hand away from my face, "Get real, Jake. And don't be so melodramatic." I continued my march towards the beach.
By the time we both made it to the tide, the sun was just beginning to set.
Jake showed off the strength of his muscles by leaping onto one of the flat, rocky boulders in one mighty leap. He noticed me checking out the muscles that rippled beneath his t-shirt, and grinned expectantly.
"Hah, funny." My tone dripped with sarcasm.
Laughing, he bent forward and offered me his hand. I took it, gasping in surprise when he pulled me up easily beside him.
"Annoying little freak show," I mumbled.
Jacob shook his head, still chuckling after seeing my expression when he had jumped up. "Damnit, Bells. How is it that you made me so indescribably happy and yet you succeed in driving me crazy all at the same time?"
I shrugged, smiling sheepishly, and then took a mighty guess. "I don't know...hormones?"
"Nice one, Bells."
I grinned, "Thought you'd think so."
I shivered when I felt his finger graze softly down my arm, below my elbow, and then down to the sensitive palm of my hand...that was when I glanced up and into his eyes.
No longer was he smiling.
He leaned forward.
I leaned back.
He looked at me, aggravated. "Bells..."
"No. Jake, don't." I shook my head and glanced down at the water, trying to think up ways that would make him understand. "You're my best friend, Jake. And...and I'm hurt. I honestly can't handle this right now. At least not yet." I stared up at him pleadingly. "You will be doing me a huge favor if you try to understand."
He sighed, glanced towards the water, at me, than back again.
I smiled, because I knew more than anything the look on his face when he was contemplating deeply on something. His eyebrows furrowed, his mouth turned downwards into a frown, and the lines on his forehead appeared...like now.
"You know I love you, Bells."
"And you love me."
I nodded once more.
"So what's the problem?"
I didn't nod this time.
Carefully, I glanced over at his face and noted that he didn't look angry, he looked...calm. Relieved, I leaned against his shoulder and felt him shudder softly against my weight. I found that entirely odd, since I should be the one shuddering against his non-crushable build that in no way was normal for a sixteen year old boy.
"Do you still love Edward?"
Hell. He did not just say that.
"What? Of course I still love Edward!" I shoved him angrily.
He rolled his eyes childishly at me. "You can't be in love with two entirely different people."
"No, I..." trailing off, I glowered at him. Why did he have to make things so damn difficult?!
Jake chuckled. "Bella...relax. I'm just trying to get some answers."
"Well, sorry to burst your bubble, bucko, but I don't have any," I muttered.
And so, to my relief, he didn't say another word as I sighed softly and leaned once more against his shoulder, letting my head fall against the nape of his neck.
In fact, neither of us said another word as silently we watched the sun set above the rolling waters that pushed in and out against the shore.