Right or Wrong?
Thanks to eternitys_charm for the crazy good banner! Bella Swan is your average teenage girl with a boyfriend named Jacob and a semi perfect life. But what if that perfect life she's come to love is all an illusion and she's just afraid to admit the truth? Edward is gorgeous popular and rich and he's the object of Bella's hate and the only one who see's the real her. When tragedy strikes will Bellla finally see the light and just admit she really loves Edward? Love has consequences but for her it's better then living a lie. Spoiler!Go to my bio to see a sneak peek on the sequel to this story! (All human! Rated teen for some strong language and mature themes.) Thanks to all my faithful reviewers! Next Chapter will soon be up!
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Guns blaring, helicopters roaring, yelling, screaming, sounds of my fellow soldiers going insane, sounds of others enjoying it a little too much. I stick an enemy with my knife and sigh. God when did killing someone become so fun to people? Seven months and a lot of blood can send people into wild killing sprees with no consequences, a deadly combination. I actually hate it though, enjoying it as much as the shy Missouri boy we always have to save from near death because he won’t kill a soul to save his skinny neck. The only and most important difference between me and him is that I’ll actually finish the job. I’ve got a family to go home too and I’ll do anything to stay alive.
The only thing that keeps me from loosing my mind is Bella and the kids. They’re probably why I got promoted so quickly, killing is easier when it’s your job. It’s what keeps food on the table, lights on, water running. I write to her everyday but it’s still never enough, just to hear about November and Abel keeps me antsy and anxious for the next letter to come. Right now it’s my turn to write to her but there’s nothing that pleasant to tell her, so I’ll just wait until later.
In the last month invasions are getting more frequent, enemy number one has been trying to catch us off guard but they’re not getting past me. My commanding officer admires my “dedication” and “hard work” so much that he’s made me second in command which makes it easier to just bark orders and then slip away to re-read one of Bella’s letters and write about some made up fairy tale of a job. I couldn’t possibly tell her how really bad it is here, it would surely break her heart. I just trace over some little details, tell her not to watch the news, and remind her that I love her. She understands.
Most of my other fellow soldiers had girlfriends too. HAD is the key word in that sentence. It’s a good thing Bella isn’t like those girls, we have a wall of shame for those kinds, somewhere I know Bella will never be. Missouri boy’s name is Jesse Rolly; he’s from Kansas City, Missouri and despite his inability to kill someone he’s the sanest person I know here. He had a girlfriend too, but she fell with all the rest, sleeping with his brother off all people! They gave him the option to go back home but I don’t think he could face it. I would’ve jumped at the chance to sleep in an air conditioned room again, even if I had a two timing girlfriend and an asshole brother. The days are hot and never seem to end, we are constantly bombed and invaded by enemy troops, dead babies are a daily acquaintance and food is scarce. Who knew it would be this bad? I only have another god-knows-how-long until I get that retirement money and those margaritas.
A month goes by and everything seems to calm down, no more invasions and barely any action. It is too quiet. Other soldiers are itching for some fun but not me, I love the quiet of the desert. It means no one’s going to die today. It gives me time to think about what I’m going to write to Bella. I make this letter fairly long on account of the peace and tranquility. She would like to hear about the strangely beautiful desert and my friend Rolly, she likes when I make friends outside of Emmett and Jasper, she’s starting to make friends too and that worries me a little bit, but I don’t let it show. As long as she’s doing okay everything’s fine with me, I just want her to be happy. I love her so much I’d kill for her. That sounds, kind of scary doesn’t it? But it’s true… I’ll do anything for her. I always go back to that smile she gave me at the airport, I always want to remember her like that. November and Abel are getting so big now, she talks about how they’re going to be when they grow up and who they’re going to date. As far as im concerned November will never date as long as I’m alive (reason #25876456 not to die). Abel is growing up so fast and is so protective of her sister, Bella can’t believe he’s only eight months old. What’s going to happen when they’re sixteen and in high school?
“Cullen!” Sgt. Major Crow yells from his tent. I rush over there leaving the finished letter on my desk, ready to be sent away and mailed.
“Enemies are in pursuit and are going to hit us in 5 minutes! Get you’re men to their stations!” He yells panicked. I run to alert the others but I am slowed by an ear ringing noise. Dust and debris fall over me and I notice I am on the ground. Missouri boy runs to me and before he can reach down to pick me up a curtain of red covers my eyes. He drops down beside me and I hear yells and shouts of soldiers dying, planes buzz over head and I scramble to rise to my feet. My gun feels powerful in my hands as I kill to get over to my station, no one notices me running, they are fighting a war by themselves.
I feel like there are weights on my feet and I can’t move fast enough, I leave a bloody trail behind me as I end the lives of those who stand in my way. Anything for Bella, I think over and over again. If only living without me was easy, if only succumbing to this kind of death wouldn’t be so tragic. Anything for my family, I tell myself. I go into that deep dark place that remembers all the terrible things I try to suppress, Jacob hitting Bella, a time when I couldn’t hold her, a time when she was not in my life. It makes it easier to go on like this, fighting someone else’s war. Suddenly everything is quiet, the ringing has stopped but I still see sand and parts of bodies flying. I can’t hear anything but mind urging my body to keep moving.
My right leg collapses and my chest screams in pain. Something’s pierced through me and I raise my hand to feel what ever it is. My hand is drenched in crimson. This is it. I see Bella’s face and she’s telling me she loves me, my eyes grow heavy but I fight to stay with her. Can this really be it? My body feels numb and I don’t want to stop thinking about her, November and Abel. All the birthdays that will pass, all the memories they will share, all the pain they will feel, all without me. I wish I could feel the pain for them, anything to keep them from the hurt. I see a picture of us in a sun filled meadow and my heart shakes in remorse. This is never going to happen.
“I love you Edward.” Bella says I slip into a sea of white. I reach for her before I am immersed in the bright, milky water. I feel her skin, see her face, smell her, kiss her. I’m holding on just for her, maybe someone will find me before im dead. Maybe I still have a chance. I can feel myself being pulled under, somewhere in the middle of it all, not dead but teetering on the fence. I lie there for what seems like hours until a pitch black cloak drapes over my eyes.“I love you Bella. I’m sorry.”
- Not so perfect.
- Impossible love.
- All comes crashing down.
- Disappointing moments.
- What is this?
- So right.
- So Wrong.
- Good news on top of good news.
- Final conclusions about love and life.
- Abel and November
- She waved goodbye.
- With out him.
- Getting Better is hard to do.
- Could this be my happy ending?
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- 17 Feb 09
- 31 Mar 09