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Desperate Times, Desperate Needs

Summary:
Bella decides she's too afraid that Edward's going to leave her again and leaves him for.... Jake! Big, and i mean big humongous, the size of a werewolf twist towards end with a promise of a sequel! Rated Adult b/c some of the scenes might end up being adult-themed!


Notes:
Thank you Nae for the awesome title.... where would i be w/o to help me throughout my day w/ my BSSOB problems? this one's for you!! i also need to throw in that i think i finally realized from writing this my new motto and i need to thank the story Wide Awake for it: Je manque toujours de temps....or my time always runs out....because it's so true and i've finally realized it...


2. Chapter 2

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It was still early when I headed upstairs telling Charlie that it was because I wanted to email Renee, but I knew waiting for me was Edward and as much as it hurt to know that I might be breaking not just my own heart tonight, but his still one as well, I still needed to see my angel. I took a deep breath at the top of the stairs and then turned so that I was standing in the doorway of my bedroom.

There on my bed sitting as still as the statue that his marble skin could make him, was my beautiful Edward and I knew what was about to come was going to be the hardest thing I had ever done.

I walked into my room and Edward glanced up at me, smiling my favorite crooked grin that I was unable to return. “Hello, my love.” I tried to say hello back my voice was stuck in my throat and I was only capable of opening and closing my mouth.

Edward instantly knew that something was not right. He stood up and came closer to me. “What’s wrong, Bella? Did something happen?”

My voice suddenly managed to make a miraculous return. “I need to talk to you Edward.”

He grew puzzled but took my hands in his and moved us so we could sit on my bed. He turned so that he was facing me and said “Go ahead. What’s on your mind love?”

“Us.” I blurted out unthinkingly. I wasn’t looking into his eyes, so I knew it wasn’t his dazzling effects that had me saying things so blatantly. I figured it was just my nerves and my eagerness for all of this to finally be over.

“What about us? Bells, just tell me what’s on your mind.” I knew he hated the fact that he couldn’t read my mind, and I always loved that he couldn’t. Right now I was having mixed feelings over it though. As much as I wanted to have a chance to tell him myself, I also just wanted him to know.

“Edward, I feel like this isn’t going anywhere.” There I said it, but he didn’t say anything in return. I looked up at him and could gauge in his eyes that he’d heard me; he just didn’t know what to say. “I need to know that you want me, too, Edward, and that you’re definitely not going to leave me again.”

“Bella, I already told you I have no intention of leaving you. Ever.” He told me forcefully.

“Edward, I realize that. You also informed me of your intentions to never change me as well, and you will have to leave me someday Edward. I will die.” I told him watching as he cringed. The reaction was always the same; this wasn’t the first time this topic had been approached.

“I already told you Isabella,” Ahh…. He used my full name; I was going to end up in hell for this. “I will follow.”

“How? Plan on going back to the Volturi? Going to run out in front of another unsuspecting family? Why don’t I just call Aro right now and tell him to get a subscription to the Forks paper so that when my obituary shows up, he’ll know to expect you soon after?!” I was growing madder by the second.

“Bella, where is this coming from?” he was thoroughly confused now, I could tell by the way his perfect eyebrows were meeting on his forehead. I didn’t have an answer to that question… but I could answer a different one entirely…one that he hadn’t asked yet but I knew would come up eventually.

“I’m giving you an ultimatum Edward…either you change me before my next birthday,” he opened his mouth to object, but I threw my hand up stopping him. “That gives you more than enough time to prepare.” His objections were always the same.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes, a clear sign he was frustrated. “Or?” he asked.

“Or… or I leave.” I told him my voice barely a whisper. His eyes snapped open, looking at me with such intensity. They were nearing black again, there but not quite… he would have to go hunting soon.

There was a pause; A large awkward filled silence. You could probably cut the tension with a knife. He stared at me, his face calculating. “There’s something else Bella…something you won’t admit to yourself, but I know it’s there.”

“There’s nothing else Edward. I just need to know where this,” I gestured between us, “where we are going.” I knew I was going to start crying soon, I was honestly surprised I’d made it this long without starting to.

“Bella, just hear me out.” He pleaded. I nodded knowing this wasn’t going to be pleasant in anyway. “I love you and I know you love me. Which is why I can’t take your life from you… at least not yet.” I opened my mouth to tell him my final decision if this was how he was going to be, but the look he gave me silenced me. “I can’t change you yet Bella because I see it in your eyes…in the way you act. You’re in love with someone else. I know you are even if you don’t, so don’t deny it yet.” He told me seeing I was about to say something else, something along the lines of a denial. He paused in his little rant, but I knew he wasn’t done. I knew what was coming next. At the thought tears came to my eyes. This was it… this was my end. “Just please remember Bella, that I do love you as I know somewhere in your heart you love me, too, still. You need to explore this other road though, and that was the reason I left in the first place.” The tears were flowing freely now as he stood up and walked to my open window, his face a perfect mask of calm. “Just promise me that if anything changes, you’ll come back to me. If…if he hurts you in anyway we’ll still be here, Bella. I’m not running away this time. I’m not giving up this fight.” He didn’t even look back at me before he just disappeared, using his vampire speed to get away from me as fast as possible.