Desperate Times, Desperate Needs
Bella decides she's too afraid that Edward's going to leave her again and leaves him for.... Jake! Big, and i mean big humongous, the size of a werewolf twist towards end with a promise of a sequel! Rated Adult b/c some of the scenes might end up being adult-themed!
Thank you Nae for the awesome title.... where would i be w/o to help me throughout my day w/ my BSSOB problems? this one's for you!! i also need to throw in that i think i finally realized from writing this my new motto and i need to thank the story Wide Awake for it: Je manque toujours de temps....or my time always runs out....because it's so true and i've finally realized it...
3. Chapter 3
Rating 5/5 Word Count 933 Review this Chapter
I sat on the bed and seriously cried my eyes out for about twenty minutes. I expected him to fight….to beg….to resort to giving me everything I ever wanted and more, half of the things being things I would vehemently refuse, but I didn’t expect him to walk out….well figuratively speaking. I didn’t expect him to leave that hole in my heart gaping wide again…but he did, and I had no one to blame but myself for this. I brought this on myself. I decided I needed to talk to him that night. I decided that he needed to leave.
I dove for the phone next to my bed….if I called and apologized maybe I could solve this mess I’d made. I started dialing rapidly the numbers a blur as my tears still flowed freely. Then his words came back to me almost as if he were in the room with me still, “You’re in love with someone else. I know you are even if you don’t, so don’t deny it yet.”
Who else could I possibly love? I risked my life for him. I flew to Italy for him. I risked my life to rescue him from the Volturi. I wanted to be changed to be with him forever. Did he not understand that I was madly and deeply in love with him and nothing anyone else ever did or said could change my way of thinking?
Then I thought back to what had just happened tonight…he left. This was the second time he’d left now. Without a backward glance, he’d left twice. Who was going to pick up the pieces this time? Last time Jake was there, but-
I gasped at the throb my heart made as I thought of Jake. It couldn’t be could it? Jake? He couldn’t be the other “he” that Edward was talking about could he?
Even as I asked myself this I knew it in the back of my head. It had to be him. The way my heart was suddenly beating again. The way my gasping from my sobs had started to slow easing to a stop. It was Jake. I was in love with Jacob Black. How could I have not seen this? I still needed to be sure though and there was only one way I could do it. I had to go to La Push and hope and pray that he wasn’t on patrol tonight because there was no way this was going to wait until tomorrow. It would eat away at me and I wouldn’t be able to get even a minute of sleep if I waited.
I flew down the stairs and into the living room, praying and hoping that my grounding didn’t extend to La Push where Charlie was concerned. “Dad!” I practically yelled as I ran into the living room startling Charlie from where he was dozing on the couch not really watching the baseball game of the night.
He must have seen the panicked look in my eyes because he was instantly in his cop mode, “Bella what’s wrong? Did something happen to your mother?” It took a minute for me to realize what he was talking about. That’s right I was supposed to be checking my email from my mother. “No, Dad. Mom’s fine.” I took a deep breath and silently prayed, “I need to go to La Push.” Charlie’s eyes widened at my request. I decided to play the card I knew would probably work, “I really need to see and talk to Jake.” I said pretty much begging.
“Sure…I guess…just be careful, Bells.” I ran into the foyer grabbing my keys and my jacket at the same time and yelled a quick “Thanks!” as I ran out the door to my truck. It started quickly, and I pulled out onto the road as fast as I could and drove to La Push with a determined look on my face.
About halfway there I started having doubts…the what if’s started creeping in. What if Jake wasn’t there? What if Jake turned me away? What if Jake didn’t really want me? What if Jake didn’t want a vampire’s sloppy seconds? I chanced a quick glance in the rearview mirror and was shocked at how disheveled I looked; my hair standing in every direction and my eyes wide, almost as if I’d seen a ghost.
Well hopefully Jake wouldn’t mind and the Jake I knew wouldn’t….but how was I supposed to know how he’d act when I told him I might possibly, sort of, kind of, could be in love with him. Yeah…it even sounded messed up to me.
I pulled up in front of his house though, the same as always and even before I had had the chance to open my door, the front door had opened and standing there silhouetted by the light in the living room, stood Jake….my Jake. At the sight I suddenly realized that Edward was right, I loved Jacob Black…I didn’t know how much…but it was enough that I slumped over the steering wheel and started to bawl again; hard sobs that wracked my body with the force of them. I cried because I’d let Edward and Jake down. I cried because I should’ve known this all along. Most importantly, I cried because I knew that in the end…I was going to have to leave one of them…and I wasn’t sure yet which one of them it was going to be, but I knew I was going to hurt them and myself in the process.