Edward leaves in New Moon and does not show himself to Bella until she is on her death bed. In her last moments Bella realized that even though 85 years had past she still loved Edward as she did when she was a teenager.
2. Bring me to life
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Bring me to life
Everything was black and I had no sense of feeling, it was like I was floating. I could not feel the ground beneath my feet; I could not even feel my feet. I could not feel anything not my arms or my legs I could not even tell if I had my eyes open at all. It was like I had no body at all. Everything was black just like when you close your eyes in a dark room only I could not open them; or were they open to begin with? I could not tell and that fact frightened me.
I was alone, but at the same time I was not. I could not feel the presence of anyone near, could not hear anything that would tell me someone else was here, where ever here was. I could hear something though and it was soft and distant like a constant hum. Kind of like a ringing in the ears only it was quieter.
There was no sense of time here and I could not tell how much of it had passed since I got here. I could have been here for moments or it could have been days; it did feel like I was here a while, but it could have just been my mind playing tricks on me. It could have been the sense of being alone that made it seem like I was here for longer then I actually was. Kind of like that saying time flies when having fun, so, it goes without saying when you not it drags by at a snails pace.
The longer it felt like I was here for the more the feeling of being alone increased so did the hum, it was more like a whisper now, but still I could not make out the words being whispered. It was easy to filter out the hum at this point kind of like how the ears filter out sound that it is adapted too, like the ticking of a clock or the hum of an appliance running. It was the other thing I could not filter out. The emotions that I felt almost to a physical level were drowning my concentration on the strange hum in the back ground. I was lonely, I felt lost, and I felt like I was missing something. Missing some vital piece of myself that I could not claim and still those whispers made no sense to my ears.
What am I doing here? How did I get here? What is this place? Questions flowed into my mind as I registered the fact that I did not remember anything. Nothing that would tell me who I was and why I was here to begin with only that I was and that not long ago I was somewhere else. It was frustrating the feeling of forgetfulness. I knew I was forgetting something but no matter how hard I tried to remember I could recall nothing but a sense of great loss and unaccomplished goals. It was like a black fog had descended over a part of my brain that held my memories.
The thing that bothered me most was that even while I don’t remember anything the echo of my feelings where still strong. I can feel the intense pain off loss, I can feel my heart constrict with love, I can feel hopelessness, but while I feel all this I don’t know why I feel it. I had no voice in this place so I could not shout my questions in hopes of gaining answers. I needed to find this out by myself, but no matter how hard I tried I could not. I felt like I wanted to cry but I couldn’t not physically at least. I can not even tell if I do not have eyes to fill with tears nor can I remember if I had them to begin with. This had to be some kind of form of advance torture, a way to drive the prisoner insane without actually touching them.
I don’t know how much has passed since I began trying to unravel the mystery; time seems to have a different meaning here where ever I was. As I tried with everything I am flashes came back slowly. The need and sheer desperation I felt to remember must have been what triggered the flashes in the first place, but I could not bring myself to care. The flashes started simple even though I could not remember what they meant they made me feel.
Colors; bronze, amber, silver, brown, red.> It was just smudges of color, but I felt as if those colors should mean something.
Bronze hair, amber eyes, smooth silver surface with a glossy edge, brown eyes and hair, red rough no gloss surface. images of what those colors meant flashed into my mind. I gripped on to them with vengeance I needed to know what they meant, why them images out of all others. The emotions that ripped through me with some of those images were so painful if I could cry out I would have. I don’t know how it is even possible to feel love so intense but at the same time have that very love connected to other not so pleasant feelings.
A face so beautiful it would have taken my breath away. Love and pain coursed through me with the image of that boys face, who was he? What did he mean to me? Why do I feel as if I love him so much it could kill me? Why do I feel as if losing him will kill me slowly and painfully as possible? Why does the mere sight of this face cause such agony within me while it also causes love?
The feeling of cold hands and lips touching my heated body.> Love, pleasure, and pain shot through me again as a name was whispered into my mind Edward.
And just like that the memories of my human life sliced through my mind like a hot poker searing a brand into my heart and brain. Sorrow coursed through me as I remembered my last hours alive, I was dead I would never see him again. I was stuck here in this empty place without a way to return to the boy I loved and still love. I was dead and I could not move. I was dead and I could not see anything was this hell? Did I go to hell for my sins? Was it so bad of me to try and live a life as a normal human with someone I did not love just so I would not have to be alone? I thought I had made my husband happy enough in life that I would not be condemned for my choice, but I guess I was wrong. I guess it was not enough that I betrayed myself when I gave my husband my body and later my children to absolve me of my sins. I guess it was not enough that I did everything in my power to make sure he was happy even while I was not. Or is this really god’s way of making sure I was rewarded? And I sent to hell in order to wait for the say my love would come for me? I remembered how many times I had told Edward that I did not want heaven if he could not be there with me. But what kind of god would send someone like Edward to hell?
The background whispers rose in pitched until It was basically yelling in my ears, no longer would they be ignored. I can send you back. the voice said and like magic words my attention was solely on that voice. I could hear nothing but that voice.
If you can pass the test I can give you your chance to return, to live again. the voice continued as I paid close attention to its words. Was what I was hearing true? Is it possible for me to go back? What test was it talking about I would do anything to be able to go back to Edward. I would sacrifice my very soul if that meant I had a chance to be with him again.
It will not be easy and the price of losing is high.> the voice continued on stating its terms. As if it had heard my answers and thought words as if I was speaking them aloud, I did not care about the price the reward was something I could not say no too.
Pass the test and return to the age you were most happy, return and continue you life as you wish, but fail, fail and your soul shall be forever lost in hell. Fail and you spend an eternity in darkness, pass you gain your hearts true desire. the voice lured telling both sides of the coin. My most happy age is when I was 17, when I was with Edward, my hearts desire is too return to him. The cost of failure meant nothing because I would not fail, could not fail I had too much riding on the outcome of this test and I will cry blood if I have too.
Be warned that it has been centuries since someone had passed the test of re-embodiment reincarnation.It did not matter to me at this point if no one had ever passed the test before. I could not, not take the test. This could very well be my last chance, my last chance to be with Edward in the way we should have been since the first time. I would not, could not allow this opportunity to pass me by out of fear. I was strong and after enduring a life time of pain nothing could make me falter on my task, I will win and I will return to my love no matter what I have too do. I already knew my answer when the voice asked
so what shall you do? Stay here or try and go.> I’LL GO! I screamed in my head hoping that this voice could hear me even if I had no voice with which to speak.
With those thoughts she began a quest so long, so treacherous, that any other with less holding them to the earth would fail. Not even the seven levels of hell could stop her love nothing will stand in her way this time around she was stronger.
The night was dark; the night of the new moon and no light shone within this area that was not man made. It was one of the few nights that it was not raining, the sky was clear and air was warm. But something was different this day, something in the air. It was charged with a strange energy that could be felt through out the small town.
Fog began to creep out from the tree line to the east of the cemetery and began to blanket the ground. The fog covered much of the stone slabs that were sticking out from the ground. It was a cemetery and not just any cemetery; it was Forks cemetery the burial place of Isabella Marie Swan.
The fog as if it had a mind of its own seeped through the ground and into the casket below breathing life into the decomposing corpse of Bella Swan. The weak brittle bones of an old woman were filled with nutrients and strengthened taking decade’s worth of aging from them. Organs and flesh started to renew and a heart started to beat once again.
A gasp of breath coked within the small confines as Bella took her first breath. The air was stale and she knew she would suffocate if she could not get out of her grave. Panic was the first emotion she felt in her renewed life as she realized that she was buried in her grave 6 feet under! ‘I did not just walk through hell only to die again of suffocation!’ she thought franticly while looking around for anything she could use to get herself out of here. It was too dark and she could not see anything that was when she realized that she was hugging something to her frame. ‘A picture?’ her mind shouted as she ran her hand blindly through the smooth surface only to find a small button. Pressing the button a dim light shone from what she could tell was one of those expensive looking digital photo frames.
‘Thank you Alice!’ she shouted to herself as she saw the picture of the family that the frame housed. Not only was it strong, but it provided her with just a little bit of light. The light allowed her to more clearly see the predicament was in and did nothing to ease her panicked mind. ‘It looks strong enough to soften the dirt as long as I can break through the wood, thank god they did not give me a plastic or cement one. Thank god it was something that would weaken as time passed.’ I thought as I tore at the cloth covering the the coffin to get a look at the state the wood of it was in, only to nearly shriek in glee as I saw a few piles of dirt drop from the cloth ‘there is a hole somewhere.’ I thought as I felt the wood of the coffin with my hands trying to find the spoke that was weakened with the small bit of light I had. I knew I had to hurry because there is no telling how long this battery would last.
Bella knew she had to be careful on where she chooses to escape from. If she chose wrong then the dirt could come rushing upon her trapping her here and she would die again. ‘The best way will probably be where my head is. I can hold my breath and try to push my way through and up. Or maybe I should kick the bottom out first? The dirt will come in but not enough to harm me and it might serve to make it easier to get out from the head of the coffin.’ She thought as she visualized how that would work out and decided it was her best bet to kick out the bottom first she only had a few breaths of oxygen left after all.
Bending both legs at the knees as much as she could in the allotted space and with a thanks to whoever put shoes on her she thrust her feet out as hard as she could. A crunch told her that her efforts were not wasted and she repeated the action once more. The aged wood gave under her feet and dirt began to fill the bottom of the coffin, but not to the point where she could not move her legs.
With the frame in hand Bella tries to push out the wood and the wood gives no reaction. Scared she begins to punch it at hard as she could paying no mind to the blood that now coated her hand as she cut herself on the wood. The damage was slow but soon she was able to punch it out enough to where the dirt started pouring in and weighing down the pieces of wood she did not break. Taking one last breath Bella moves her hands franticly while kicking her feet to propel her out of the coffin digging with use of the frame her way up to the top. Thank god she was not buried at 6 feet! It only seemed like 4 or five and soon her hand broke the surface of the ground and she knew she was free.
The fog covered her memorial stone completely and nothing could be seen in the area she was laid to rest. At least nothing until there was a stir in the air, a stir that caused the fog to break and out of that fog came a dirty bloodied hand hold a broken silver picture frame. Another hand followed the first both now clawing at the ground as a head of dark became visible. A gasp of breath echoed through-out the area as Bella clawed herself out of her grave only to collapse on the ground the moment she was free in exhaustion.
She laid on the ground unmoving and just breathing deep breaths for 20 minutes before she decided to move. She knew she could not be seen here incase someone comes by and sees the grave disturbed and her by it she would get arrested for grave robbing her own grave. Standing on unsteady legs Bella looks down at her cloths and attempts to shake some of the dirt off of it, not that It mattered at all what it looks like. She was wearing an old white dress designed for an old woman and it hung off her body only being held up by her shoulders.
“Now what?” she asked herself never having really thought up to this point in her plan to escape. ‘Where am I going to go now?’ she could not return home there was no telling how much time had passed since she died and someone could be living there now. She was dirty, tired, and hungry with no where to go. ‘A plan does not matter yet, I have to get out of here first.’ She thought as she took in a look around seeing it was night time. Before she gave it much more thought she took off into the tree-line running.
A half hour later Bella found herself standing in front of a place she has not seen since she was 20. The Cullen’s old home in forks. It was dark no lights were lit which was promising. It meant that they have not sold it yet so with a sorry to Esme she broke a window pane on the back door and let herself in.
Dust littered everything; it was like no one has been here for a very long time. Cabinets where hangings off its hinges while some had fallen off entirely. Blankets were strewn through-out the house covering all the furniture. Walking into the living room Bella exhaled in relief as a cloth covered couch came into view. Taking the cloth off the couch Bella was happy to see that it was not covered in dust and collapses in exhaustion falling asleep before her head even touches the couch.