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Sometimes Goodbye Is A Second Chance

Summary:
After 5 years of rebuilding his life and putting the pieces back together, everything falls apart once again when she comes storming back into his life. Alice/Jasper - AU and AH


Notes:
Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me. I am not, will never be and never was Stephenie Meyer. This is an Alice Jasper AU and AH story. And also my first Twilight story.


2. Chapter 2

Rating 0/5   Word Count 2788   Review this Chapter

CHAPTER TWO: Confusion


Now most days I spend like a child
who’s afraid of ghosts in the night
I know there ain’t nothing out there
I’m still afraid to turn on the light.

- Arms Of A Woman by Amos Lee

Jasper’s POV

My hands suddenly started shaking as I heard the bathroom door open and close with a soft click. I could practically feel her walking down the stairs and knew that any moment now she would to walk into the kitchen.

After a couple of moments I saw her in the living room, taking in her surroundings. She noticed me and came into the kitchen, looking ridiculously small in my clothes. But at least she looked better even though I could still sense some distress. I have always been able to read people pretty well and was especially attuned to Alice. I guess it hadn’t gone away completely. I suddenly realized that indifference was not an option anymore. Running away suddenly seemed like the perfect choice.

“I’m going to prepare the guest room for you. There’s food in the refrigerator, and tea on the counter. Make yourself at home.”

Already running up the stairs, I did not even give her a chance to answer. Well done idiot, well done. I just didn’t know what to say or do. When Alice came down into the kitchen, I was so nervous. I lost myself in those perfect blue eyes of hers and did not know how to act. What was I suppose to say? Any usually pleasantries just would not do and it was way too soon for a serious conversation. Therefore I chickened out and ran.

On the right side of the bathroom was a guest room, that no one had ever stayed in it before. Trying desperately not to think about her downstairs, I went to my bedroom, which was on the other side of the bathroom and took some sheets and covers out of the closet. I went to the guest room and began to work, bumping my knee into the nightstand in my haste.

The room could use some dusting, but otherwise it was neat and comfortable. Hell, the whole house could probably use some dusting and vacuuming, but at least my clothes weren’t all over the place. And thank god I have taken the trash and all the empty bottles out the previous night.

The guest room was quite spacious; it had a big bed, two closets, a table and a chair. Nothing special but it would do. I mockingly called it the green room, because most of covers, walls and the curtains were green. She should like it. Wait, what do I care if she likes it or not?

I finished with the covers, took one more look at the closets to make sure they were empty. I briefly scanned the room, everything seemed fine.

You can’t stay here forever, Chicken. Go back downstairs.

I had many questions I wanted to ask her but was so afraid of hearing the answers. My head was a complete mess and I really had no idea what to do.

I slowly walked back downstairs. I entered the kitchen and saw her sitting in one of the high chairs behind the kitchen isle, eating a sandwich. She tensed a bit when I entered but smiled nonetheless. God, I missed that smile. Focus Jasper! Or you’ll get hurt again before you can count to ten.

I wondered how long it had been since she ate a nice warm meal. Something just didn’t feel right, well, lots of things didn’t feel right, but there was something beside the obvious about her state, that concerned me.

“I set up the guest room. If you need anything else upstairs, just let me know.” I told her. She looked so tired and worn out.

She smiled sheepishly. “Thanks. I hope you don’t mind, I made myself a sandwich.”

“No, of course not. I told you to make yourself at home.” It sounded so weird, telling her to feel at home. There was a time that I had wanted nothing more than to sweep her off her feet and make a home with her.

Alice’s POV

Well, best thing to get this over with.

I walked down the stairs, taking a look into the living room. He wasn’t there. Taking a look around, I had to admit he had a nice place. It was modern yet cozy. The living room was very light; the northern side was covered in windows. There was a big black couch facing the windows, with a coffee table in front and a flat screen TV behind it. A bookshelf with a load of book covered the left side, with a loveseat and a floor lamp next to it. A soft brown rug covered the floor. On the right side, next to the door that led into the kitchen, there was a big table with a laptop on it. The table held a stereo as well as several CDs on the shelf above the table. He always did have a thing for books and music.

The door to the kitchen was open and I could already see Jasper leaning on the counter looking right at me. He looked really handsome in his gray shirt and black pants. My memories had not done him any justice; he was even more beautiful than before. My heart skipped a beat.

“I’m going to prepare the guest room for you. There’s food in the refrigerator, and tea on the counter. Make yourself at home.”

Then he was gone. I guess I wasn’t the only one who was nervous. I walked over to the fridge and made myself a sandwich. The kitchen was nice, with an isle in the middle and three high stools next to it. I sat on one and looked around. You could see the forest through a window, with a small creek running down in between. It was beautiful. The trees and the lawn were covered in snow and I really hoped the rain would not do much damage. I liked the snow, it was so peaceful.

It was so nice and warm inside. Suddenly there was a noise upstairs, bringing my train of thoughts back to Jasper. He had grown up. He looked older and more serious, his eyes still the same deep green but his hair was a bit darker than I remembered. He also had stubble, which he never had before. He had changed, but deep down I believed that he was still the same Jasper.

Did I do the right thing by coming here? I have gotten myself into such a mess. I remember being carefree once, going shopping all the time and hanging out with my friends and of course, Jasper. It was a lovely time. I smiled at the memories. But life isn’t a fairy tale and I had woken up to the real cruel world.

He walked back into kitchen. I smiled at him, because despite all the problems and grudges I had against him; he was letting me stay here and I had to be thankful for that. Everyone aside from our friends and his family had always considered him dark and dangerous. A trouble-maker they would say, although I had no idea why. Sure, he did some things wrong, but which teenager hasn’t? But I always saw the light in him and despite what people thought, he made me a better person, he had once been my sun. Before that.

“I set up the guest room. If you need anything else upstairs, just let me know.” He looked nervous. I guess your ex storming back into your life does that.

“Thanks. I hope you don’t mind; I made myself a sandwich.” He leaned on the opposite side of the isle.

“No, of course not. I told you to make yourself at home.”

Before he started to ask questions I wasn’t nearly prepared to answer, I used a diversion and asked him about his family. “How are your parents? And Edward and Rosalie?” God, I missed them. If I would have been thinking clearly then, I might have talked to them or stayed in touch with them. But no, I just wanted to be alone. So I left everything behind and started a new life. And look what good that did. Good choice, Alice.

He sighed. “Edward and Bella moved to Seattle a year ago. Edward landed this job at a music academy and Bella went with him. Last time I heard from them, she was working at a bookstore and they were moving into a bigger apartment.” Last time?

“Rosalie and Emmett got married four years ago. She gave birth to twins about 10 months ago,” he smiled affectionately. “She worked in the car industry for a while but stays at home now. Emmett is a sport manager. They have a house in Portland.”

“Mom and dad are fine. Dad still works at the hospital in Forks and mom does some interior design.” He was polite, and so official. He told me nothing about how they really were doing, just the basics.

But I wanted to know more. I was desperate for some news of my old friends, for I missed them dearly.

“I always knew Edward and Bella were going to stay together. They were perfect for each other.” Of course I also always though that about Jasper and I and look where that got me. “Edward always loved his music and I think Bella working in a bookshop is just a brilliant idea.” Edward and Bella got together a couple of months before I left, although it has been clear long time before that that they were in love with each other. Both were just too stubborn to actually do anything about it.

“You know Edward,” replied Jasper. “I think the first thing he did after learning how to walk was crashing his fingers on the plastic little blue piano he got for his 1st birthday. And well, a bookshop is perfect for Bella, she can read more books now, and not only Wuthering Heights and books by Jane Austen and Shakespeare.” He smiled at that. We always all used to tease Bella about her reading habits.

“Yeah, I do,” I said smiling. “Tell me more about the twins. Are they boys or girls?” Rosalie always wanted to be a mother and hearing her news really made me feel happy for her. At least some of us got what they wanted.

“They actually have one of each, sweet little monsters, Ella and Jack,” he explained with a smile on his face. I could see he loved them dearly. He would be such a good father, I though to myself, unconsciously putting my hand on my stomach. “It was a tough and long struggle. They started trying right after they got married but nothing happened. They saw several specialists and they were told there was a slim chances for Rosalie to ever get pregnant. It broke her, cause the one thing she wanted most was a child of her own. And it was even worse when one of her friends gave birth to a boy, Henry, I think. She became depressed and thought someone was punishing her.”

“That must have been hard for Rose. I remember how she always looked at babies and children, and how much she wanted one.” I knew people always thought she was vain and selfish, but beneath the mask she could be very warm and sweet.

“Yeah,” answered Jasper. “But thankfully, after a couple of long years of doctors and specialists; she finally got pregnant and I haven’t ever seen her happier. Emmett was crazy, worrying all the time, praying that everything would be ok and taking care of her. He was so overprotective. But thankfully, everything turned out alright and the twins arrived. You should see them, they are adorable.” I could see his façade falling down when he was talking about Rose. They had always been very close. Esme and Carlisle took them in when they were a little over two. They had lost their parents, Esme’s older sister and husband, in a fire. Esme had just gotten pregnant with Edward. It was a big change for Jasper and Rosalie. They were afraid of everyone in the beginning, sticking together, sleeping in the same bed, and always holding each others hands. I had seen some pictures once, from when they were little and first came to the Cullens; they both had such big scared eyes and looked so timid and unsure. But Esme and Carlisle eventually earned their trust and their life turned for the better. The siblings opened up and accepted their new parents and their new little baby brother. And they have been a real family ever since, but I think Rosalie and Jasper will always felt closest to each other.

“I’m happy everything turned out well for her,” I said. “If anyone deserves to be a mother, she does.” He gave me a pointed look, and briefly looked at my stomach. I could see he wanted to say or ask me something, but it was too soon to go down that road. And way too late.

“Maybe you should go to bed. It is already late and … its late,” you look half dead, I could hear him saying with his expression.

“Just one more thing,” I said before leaving the kitchen. I wanted to hear about Esme and Carlisle as well. They were practically my second parents and I know how worried they must have been when I disappeared. I desperately needed to hear that they were doing alright and that they were ok. “How are your parents feeling about the new additions to the family?” I asked, although what I really wanted to know was how they were after I left and if I broke their hearts.

He humored me. “They are happy, Alice. They see the twins often, it’s not far to Portland and they couldn’t be happier about being grandparents. Although they often joke they’re too young for it.” Esme and Carlisle married really young, I think they were about 18 and soon after they got Jasper and Rosalie to take care of. Edward followed. Which makes them something over 40 now.

“Dad has been working less since the twins were born. It was hard to convince the hospital, since he’s very good at his work and patients seem to love him. But he put his foot down and told them how it would be, and I guess they gave in. And mom works from home anyway, so that was never a problem.”

I was happy for them, although I still didn’t get the exact answer I was looking for. Well, I guess it will have to wait a bit more.

“Good night, Jasper.” I got off the chair and walked out of the kitchen. But I had to say something else. “Thank you.” He smiled at me, a small smile that didn’t reach his eyes and I could swear his eyes seemed a bit wet.

I got to the top of the stairs, when I realized I didn’t know where to go. I went to the bathroom instead, having to pee. This peeing business was seriously no fun. I washed my hands and face, and then I realized I had no toothbrush or comb. Yeah, I was a mess. I figured I could borrow Jasper’s comb and just use my finger for the toothbrush. I could ask him tomorrow if he could lend me some money. I would pay him back as soon as I could, I hated being in debt but relied on the fact that this whole mess was partially his fault too.

I walked out of the bathroom hearing a noise coming from the room on the left, so I decided to try the room on the right. It was a lovely room; there was a big bed in the middle of it, which looked soft and extremely inviting. The covers were all in green and gold. As was much of the rest of the room, actually. I could feel Esme’s touch all over it. Deciding I could inspect the room in further detail in the morning, I sank under the soft warm covers and turned off the table light.