The Changing: A Different World
After Edward leaves Bella in the forest in New Moon, she falls asleep after trying to find him and wakes up in a room. She doesn't recognize where she is, and when she finds out, she thinks she has gone mental. She is in a completely different world, yet, with the same people she knew in Forks. Including a certain family she once thought to be part of. Banner made by the amazingly talented Anne Cullen, thanks!
Well, I really like this story. I think it's my best yet. And I think you'll like it. Disclaimer : Sadly, I own nothing, all is owned by Stephenie Meyer and everyone who helped created the wonderfull Twilight Saga. But thank you to Stephenie for letting us use our imagination and "abuse" your characters some for our own entertainment. And also a big thanks to my friend and personal beta devilsgenie, who has been wonderful and very patient with me. So, thank you very very much!
4. Chapter 4: Searches, break-ups and dreams
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Chapter 4: Searches, break-ups and dreams
I guess I had to wait and see for what was to come next, though one thing I was sure off; tomorrow, I would surf the net and look for any clues as to how I got here. I was going to find something! I would get out of this place and back to Forks! That much I believed.
I will go rolling fast
Arms out in the rain
Feel momentum building to lift
Off ground like an airplane
Love ties you down to the pain
A billion eyes are watching first light
They see what remains
Remains by Maurissa Tancharoen
I woke up late sunday morning due to the medication I had taken the night before - it was ten in the morning when I woke up with a loud groan - but at least I was better rested than the previous day. My mood was the same - gloomy, dark, depressing, scared - as the past 2 days; no change there.
I remember my vow to search the net and try to find my way out of here, starting today. I could no longer waste any time wallowing in self-pity; I had to withstand the pain now, do my best to stay strong, not fall apart and find my way back home. If Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz could do it, then so could I.
However, my plans to hit the books – figuratively speaking - were cut short by a loud grumbling coming from the very pits of my torn up stomach. 'Ugh, why do I have to be hungry right now?' I thought as my face turned into a scowl and I stalked out of the room, to the kitchen downstairs - not even bothering to shower first, there was plenty of time for that later.
Apparently, I had the house all to myself today. I found a note by Renée on the kitchen table, stating she and Charlie had an emergency at work and would be gone all day and possibly night. The note also said to call the office if anything was wrong, though I had no idea what the number was or where and what the office was. I got an idea. Maybe I could google them - if i didn't forget, I had a lot on my mind after all - and see if I come up with something concerning their jobs; they appeared to be rich, so it was possible I could discover something about Charlie and Renée's jobs.
I searched the cabinets in the kitchen for a quick snack, maybe something I could eat up in Izzy's room. After an extensive search, I found a box of granola bars and took it with me upstairs; maybe, if I were lucky, I would even be able to taste the food I ate today.
One back in the enormous room, wich I still couldn't get over how beautiful it was, I fired up the laptop, taking bites of my granola bar - which didn't taste good, but not bad either - while I waited for it to be ready.
A scream almost escaped my lips when I saw the laptop was secured with a password - Izzy probably didn't want her parents to pry about her personal documents or something similair to that - one that I had no idea of knowing. How, on God's green earth, was I supposed to decipher this password? I wasn't Izzy, I didn't think like her, I was completely different! Or was I? In a way, I guess we were the same. We shared the same parents, the same blood, the same looks, so maybe we shared some similar thoughts as well? Just because our personalities were completely different, that didn't mean all our thoughts were, right? I guess I could only hope that was the case, or else I would have no access to this laptop at all.
I typed in the first word that crossed my mind: ISABELLA. 'Yeah, original right, choose your name as your passwords. That will never work.' My mind told me, I ignored my stupid little voice and pressed enter, hoping I would be allowed to the contents of the laptop now. Sadly, it didn't work, didn't know why I thought it would work either, such a stupid password. I tried again: IZZY. Maybe she was so shallow she used her nickname. Sadly, I was wrong, again.
I thought more carefully for my next try, I didn't know how many times I would be allowed to type in a false password before the laptop shut me off completely. Suddenly, without really thinking about it, but clearly feeling the aching throb in my stomach and heart as I did it, I typed a new name: EDWARD. I was positive it would not work - though something inside me said it would - I clearly remembered how this world's Edward seemed to hate me, so why shouldn't Izzy hate him as well?
Hesitantly, I pressed enter, waiting for the laptop to refuse the password, yet secretly hoping it would be accepted. Much to my surprise - though a part of me, I didn't know why, was not surprised at all; if anything, that part was a little smug - the laptop accepted the password and brought me to the laptop's main screen.
While I was fully intend on starting up the net in search for my escape from this world, and not snoop around any of Izzy's files, a folder on the desktop caught my attention. The title read: My secret self. I raised my brows in confusion, clicked on the map and found there were 64 documents in the folder. I randomly clicked on one in the middle and began reading. What I read, shocked me beyond belief.
Hey, Izzy here! Today sucked! School sucked! I hate Jessica and Lauren following me around like stupid plastic dolls! They're so annoying, but I have to live up to my rep.and stick with them, much to my dismay.
But, the thing that sucked even more, was the same thing as always: Edward Cullen. Or, as I like to call him: Hottie love-of-my-life McHottie! God, I can't believe he hates me! More than that, I can't believe he thinks I hate him!!! I don't hate him for Christ' sake, I love him! I've always loved him, ever since that day we met at second grade. At least then we were best friends, at least then I had him in my life! Since high school began, all we have been has been enemies; no more, no less. I wish I could turn back time and ask for forgiveness. I still can't believe I let him go just because Jessica and Lauren - who I thought were my friends back then - told me he was no good for me, how he didn't even like me, how he spread ugly rumours around about me. All lies, I found out a while ago, all deceptions. They wanted Edward and wanted me out of the way. Stupid bitches! Well, at least they didn't get him either, he was never interested in them.
Anyway, now I've written this down for like the 20th time, I'll get back to today. I bumped into Edward during lunch and god did I blush as red as a tomato! He just gave me the same cold, hating, distant look as always; every time he gives me that look, I feel like dying.
Why can't I just tell him I'm sorry, I love him and never want to let him go?! Oh, right, because I'm a self-absorbed, shallow, fake bitch! Oh, and yeah, not to mention, I still have my asshole of a boyfriend to think off. Jason Grindson - stupid, cheating-ass boyfriend of mine - I've been dating him for two fucking years! Ugh, I hate him!
I hate my life! I hate that Edward hates me! I hate that my parents hate me and my stupid, selfish behaviour! I hate it all!
I stopped reading then, rapidly closing the file as I didn't want to intrude any more than I already had. I sure hadn't expected anything like that. Maybe she wasn't so different from me after all? She just pretended to be, but why pretend? Why go through all the effort to be someone else when you could be yourself? For popularity? For friends you hated? For a cheating boyfriend? I didn't understand.
'Great, now I'm completely distracted!' I thought as I remembered my initial goal on this laptop: search the net and find a way out of here! I nodded to myself, still ignoring the searing pain in my heart and stomach, clicked on the internet icon and waited for it to start.
The page came up on Google - exactly what I needed - and I typed in the first thing that came to mind: ALTERNATE DIMENSIONS. I heaved a sigh; 37.700.000 hits?! It would take me forever to get through that. I scanned the first page quickly, trying to determine if I would find anything useful through this search.
I found several links to wikipedia, but they were all about fiction books, not what I was looking for. I found a site named Alternate Dimensions or Worlds, but all I found was a discusion forum of people talking about the subject in ways I could hardly comprehend. I went back to my search in hopes I would find something in normal English, not gibberish.
I came across a few more sites where nothing posted on it was of my understanding. Eventually, I changed the search topic and typed in: ALTERNATE REALITY OR UNIVERSE. I didn't have to search long before I found an interesting title: What is a parallel universe? I clicked on it and carefully read the article posted on the site.
I learned that scientists now believe that there is more than one world in the universe, and that those worlds could easily contain a copy of ourselves, just slightly different. I found that to be highly of interest, since it very much related to the world I was in now - a world with copies of people I knew in my world, but who were slightly different here. This piece of information helped a little, but it didn't help to figure out how I got here. Some part of me wondered if I was looking in the wrong place. I already knew where I was, now I needed to look for information regarding who or what put me here.
Once more, I typed in a new google search: MYTHICAL CREATURES. I found a link to Wikipedia named: List of legendary creatures. I figured I could give it a shot and clicked on the link. My mouth fell wide open as I saw the endless list of all creatures listed on the page, but I had to be persistent, so I began to read all the names and descriptions. Most of the so-called creatures on the list were too ridiculous for words. I found one named Abatwa, who apparently were little people that rode on ants. Seriously?! Whoever created that page had lost quite a bit of his marbles, in my opinion.
I came across one ludicrous creature after another. A giant turtle supporting the world, a hair-cutting spirit, a supernatural river otter, hell hounds, disembodied flying heads that attacked people; ... one absurd notion after the other. After what felt like hours, I finished the entire list and 3 more granola bars, yet I still found nothing that could be of any help.
I went back to the Google starting page, unsure of what to do now. My fingers lingered on the keys of the type board, itching to enter something in the search engine. On a whim, I closed my eyes and let my brain to the talking. My fingers pressed down on 5 different keys, though I had no idea what they were. It was weird; it was as if my brain knew everything I wanted, no, needed to know, but refused to tell me. Instead, I kept receiving bits and pieces of critical information when I was lost, just like when I needed to know the password to access this laptop.
I opened my eyes and scrunched them up in confusion as I saw what I had typed; WITCH. Why would I type that? I shrugged, pressed enter and began my search for the still unknown, though, I was somehow sure I was on the right track now.
There were too many results that lead nowhere, which I had no time for, so I decided to expand my search. Instead of only typing in the word WITCH, I also typed in the word WIKIPEDIA, hoping I would find something now.
I found a link to Wikipedia about witches. Most of the stuff I read were things about the early witch trials and how everything was blown out of proportion. Only one thing stood out, something I knew, yet, something that I needed to read again. Witches had powers which they could use to help or harm people. Something told me that this was what I had been looking for these past few hours. Witches. Did they exist? Did they do this to me as some weird form of punishment? If they did exist, which I believed they did without hardly any questions, why were they out to harm me? Did they cause that dream the other day? Was I on the right track?
So many questions floated around in my head, all left unanswered, off course. I knew I was on the right track. I didn't know how I knew, but I just knew. Even though it made no sense to me.
A grumbling from my stomach brought me from my thoughts, alerting me to the fact that my body needed stomach. It was so strange how, through all the pain I was experiencing - not only from this strange world, but also a lot from his departure - I hardly noticed I was hungry, or even felt it. I noticed because my stomach rumbled, but I didn't feel hungry, nor felt the longing for food.
I looked at the clock and saw it was already fifteen past noon; I had been searching longer than I expected. I shut down the laptop and decided to take a shower first. Grabbing some of my new clothes, socks and shoes, I walked out the room, into the bathroom and turned on the shower.
As soon as I was fully undressed, I stepped under the hot water and relished at the feel of it. I loved showers, I did. Even in this world, that feeling did not leave me - one thing I could at least be grateful for. I tried to keep my mind blank; I didn't want to think of my newfound discovery just yet, nor did I want to think of him. The pain was still so livid inside me, swimming just beneath the surface, trying to find it's way up. The only thing that kept it at bay was my determination to find my way out of here first; I could let the flames of pain torture me when I found my way back.
It was a short, much needed shower. One that helped me calm myself in ways nothing else could, just as usual. I dressed in my new clothes and shoes, blow-dried my hair and appraised myself in the large mirror hanging from Izzy's bedroom door. I had to admit, I looked much better than yesterday or the day before, though my eyes betrayed the immense pain I was in.
I was wearing a pair of black pants, a dark-purple tank top and a black hoodie on. I chose my new pair of black converse to wear with the clothing. I knew my look was rather depressing - maybe Emo or Goth-like - but I didn't care. I liked it, it fitted my mood exactly, just as I had intended. Also, now I wouldn't trip anymore over those high-heeled shoes.
Just as I reached the bottom of the stairs, planning to go into the kitchen for some lunch, the bell rang. I froze. 'What should I do? Do I answer? Do I pretend no-one's home? I can't talk to any people today! I don't want to!' Another ring of the bell pulled me out of my panicked state of mind. I still had no idea what to do, but I guessed if it was someone here for me, I should open, since they probably knew I was grounded and therefore home.
One agonizingly slow step at a time, I walked to the front door. As I walked, the person on the other side of the door became very impatient, not only ringing the bell continuously, but also knocking on the door itself now too. I took a deep breath, released it and steadied myself for what was to come next.
As soon as the door was opened, I was attacked by someone's mouth on mine - I never even saw who it was, though I had a pretty good guess now - I was disgusted, to say the least. I only ever wanted E- his lips on mine. It hurt to think about those sweet kisses, but the memory of them and the pain they brought me now was ten times better than the person who was attacked me with his mouth and, eww, now his tongue as well. I had to put a stop to this!
I pushed and pushed with all my might - grunting and panting at all the effort it cost me - until I finally managed to push him off me, straight to the floor.
"What the fuck?!" The boy, whom I recognized from the photographs of Izzy in the bedroom and realized was her boyfriend - Jason, I think his name was - roared, obviously furious by my response to his sloppy, unwanted kiss.
"My thoughts exactly! Who the hell do you think you are... Jason?!" I yelled back, only a little unsure in my speech as I said what I assumed was his name. He didn't seem to react weirdly when I called him Jason, so I figured I was right. 'Thank god for Izzy's diary.' I thought as I watched Jason pick himself up from the floor and straighten his crumpled outfit.
"What did you do that for?!" Again with the yelling, jeez, that was annoying. I immediately knew I did not like this guy at all, he was much too aggressive for my taste. I decided I would tell him to get lost; I was already planning to do that as soon as I knew about the boyfriend factor, but I was going to be nice. Though, nice was out of the question now.
Before I could say anything, however, he spoke first, "Fuck Izzy, what are you wearing?!" Still yelling. "Did you completely go crazy this weekend?!" Ugh, enough with the shouting!
"First: it's Bella from now on. Second: no! I have not gone crazy! Third: We're through! Now get out of my house!" I said, well, shouted, actually, but only because his shouting match started to rub off on me. He was shocked, to say the least, at first. Then came the fury and rage.
"Whatever, Bella," he spat my name. "I was sick of you anyways. Now I ain't got to pretend anymore! Fuck you!" He said, much calmer than before, then left, slamming the door behind him. I sighed, at least that was over and done with.
For lunch, I just drank some tomato soup and ate a grilled cheese sandwich - my taste was gradually improving, though food still tasted no where near as good as it used to.
After doing the dishes, I tried to search for more useful information about witches, I came up with several interesting points, some even frightful, but none of which I was sure I could believe. All I ever found was that they were very powerful beings, albeit human, and could do about anything with their magic. They could make potions, create spells, control the weather, anything. Apparently, each witch had a special power of their own, such as knowledge of the future - that one stung, it reminded me too much of my former best friend - control over fire, control over the earth's natural elements... and the list went on and on. True? Perhaps. Doubtful? Probably.
Eventually, I grew tired of my search - I had done enough for the day - so I decided on doing something else that needed to be done, though I was reluctant to do it. In order to be ready for school the next day, I had to search Izzy's room for all her school stuff, including her schedule, if she still had it.
Her books, homework and schedule weren't hard to find, they were all in the two small cabinets of the desk the laptop stood on. As I looked through everything, I noticed she was failing a lot of her classes, refusing to do her homework or even fill in anything on any of the tests she got. Did she want to flunk out of high school? What a peculiar girl.
I saw she had several assignments to be done by tomorrow, and had yet to start on any of them. As an effort to occupy my mind - and to not get into any trouble - I started the tasks. There was one on Biology, one on English, one on Math and one on Native American History. Most of the homework was easy, all stuff I had learned before. The Math task was a little harder, because I sucked at Math, but I think I managed fairly well.
Lastly, I finished the English assignment, which was to write an essay of one of the great contemporary novels of this time. I decided to write it about a book called White Oleander, a very powerful and emotional book. I had loved it the first time I read it and even more the second time I did. I loved to read. I hadn't read anything since all of this happened and wasn't even sure if I ever wanted to read anything again. It reminded me all too much about my former life.
It was late by the time I finished, almost midnight, and still there were no parents in sight. I decided I could use some sleep in order to get through the next day unscathed. I did, however, fear what sleep would bring me this time, without any medication to assure a dreamless, though not quite peaceful, sleep. I guess I just had to face it like a man, so to speak.
It took me a while to fall asleep, since my thoughts continued to race from one thing to another. One more painful than the other. The random thoughts popping into my head about my former life, family, friends and love, hurt the most. Of course, no surprise there.
Ultimately, I fell asleep. Or, at least, I think I did. It was weird, I felt wide awake, though I was in a dream of some sorts. This dream felt as real and painful as the first one, though it was not terrifying.
I was standing in the dark again, surrounded by the same blue fire as the first time. The fire did not scare me this time, subconsciously, I think I had expected it to be there. I didn't speak, didn't yell, didn't move. I just stood there. There was no laughter this time, no falling, no colourful HELL words. All there was, was a pair of bronze, topaz-like eyes and a pair of green, emerald eyes staring at me. Both of which reminded me of him.
The bronze/topaz eyes reminded me of my former love, the vampire. I could NOT think his name! The green, emerald eyes reminded me of him in this world, human. Both equally entrancing. Both hurt me very badly. Though, the bronze/topaz eyes threatened to tear me apart, rip open the hole and spit in it just for it's own pleasure, the green, emerald eyes brought out a different reaction, also hurtful, but less. The human eyes made me want to smile, which only caused me to feel an immense deal of guilt toward the vampire eyes. I felt as if I were betraying my vampire by liking his human eyes, as though I were giving up on him. Feeling that, made me wish to die.
All in all, the whole dream was hurtful, threatening to weigh me down with my pain and guilt. This dream, though it felt like something more to me, was grievous. If this was the feelings I received in this dream or whatever, I'd rather take the scare-me-to-death dream any night of the week. At least the feelings there were simple; fear, terrifying, deadly, fear. The feelings in this dream were much more painful and confusing, I didn't like it.
I woke up, slightly startled and sweating - though, thankfully, not as bad as the first time - contemplating what just happened. It felt as real as the first time, though the only thing that remained the same were the blue flames, all the rest was different. I would find out what all this meant. For the life of me, I would!
It was four am, I saw on the alarm clock. Too early to get up, too late to go back to sleep (not that I even wanted to sleep again). Since I was up now anyway, I decided to get ready for school. Starting with a shower.
I hoped I would get through this day in one piece. No, actually, I hoped I would get through this entire thing in one piece, starting with today. All the while, I had to try to stay strong and not fall apart.
How on earth did I ever get tangled up in all of this? That was beyond me...