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Unknown Desire

Summary:
I realized the moment I saw him I loved him. That I could never love anyone else, no matter what I may think. That at this very moment, I wanted his lips on mine, and I wanted him. Forever.
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Nessie has reached full growth and she has made up her mind: she wants to try dating. She meets a new guy named Josh. With two men battling for her heart: will she choose her soul mate, or someone new?

This Banner was made by: TwiCat but it was deleted because it was too big, so if you're reading this TwiCat, can you make the same one but smaller? :D


Notes:


2. Chapter 2

Rating 5/5   Word Count 980   Review this Chapter

“Hey Nessie!” he greeted me as he pulled me into a big bear hug. I hugged him back, something I rarely did.

“How was shopping?” he asked when he released me.

“Fun.” I replied.

“Just fun? Did ya buy lots of clothes?” he prompted.

“Yes, Jake, I did. It was a blast! And,” I gasped sarcastically, “I even got a pretzel! Wow! It was the best experience of my life!” I mocked sarcastically as I burst out laughing. He laughed with me.

“Ha-ha. I was just asking.” he defended himself.

“I was kidding! Sheesh Jake! Take a chill pill!” I teased. He stuck his tongue out at me. I did the same and flashed him a huge grin, which caused him to do the same. We were so alike.

“I wanna hunt.” I said as I walked out the door. He followed me.

“Wanna have a contest?” he offered. I nodded and he ran into the woods to phase, something I had no desire to watch. After he phased, he continued to run.

“Cheater!” I yelled at the wolf and caught up with him easily.

We hunted deer, something that was easy and close. After I was done hunting, I sat down and watched him hunt. When he was finished, he ran behind some trees and phased back. I saw him come back in just shorts. I looked away, not to stare. His bulging muscles flexed as he walked.

“I swear, you've grown even more!” I praised as I looked at his amazing muscles.

“Thanks for noticing.” he mumbled. Oh no, I thought to myself. He thinks that I watch him, like that I like him. Shoot. That was something I didn't want to happen. Not after what I had to do. I had to tell him I wanted to date. Most of all, I had to practically break his heart.

I knew my face must have shown the pain I was thinking about, because Jake noticed.

“What's wrong Ness?” he asked.

“Nothing.” I shook my head and looked away from him. He came to sit beside me. He pulled my chin up to look at him. He was awfully close to me.

“Tell me. Please?” his black eyes burned into mine. I shook my head again.

“Nessie, you can tell me! Just say it. Did I do something?” he was worried.

“No! You didn't do anything. It's just, I , well.” I couldn't even finish my sentence.

“What?” he whispered.

“I want to tell you something, but you're gonna hate me.” I mumbled.

“I could never hate you Nessie! I love you!” he declared. He never said that to me before.

“Jake, I wanna date. Other guys. I'm so sorry.” tears began to role down my cheek. He brushed them away.

“Okay. So, you don't love me the way I love you?” I could hear the pain in his voice.

“Jake, I don't know. I just need my time to think about it.” I gave him a classic break-up line, how cheesy.

“But, there is still a chance, right?” he asked.

“Yes. There is a chance. I just want to figure things out. Play the field. Go on dates.” I was telling the truth, at least.

“Okay. Then, I'll hold onto that chance. I'll wait for you forever.” he said.

“Jake, you should try dating too. Then, we'll have the chance to be jealous.” I smiled at him.

“I don't know. I guess it's worth a try. Always know, no matter what, I wouldn't choose anyone over you. Just let me know.” he told me. I nodded. I stood up, tears still rolling down my face slowly.

“Bye Jake. I'm so sorry.” I whispered.

“Can we stay friends?” he asked.

“Of coarse, Jake. You're my very best friend.” I told him. I knew it was something he heard before from my Mom, but I knew it was the truth. Also, he treated me better than he treated my Mom, when she was human. He was mean to her, because she was dating a vampire.

I would not be dating any vampires, so there's no reason for Jake to hate me. Right?

“Bye Jake.” I repeated, as I ran away. He stayed back, not following me.

I ran home and didn't even slow down until I crashed onto my bed. I laid my head down on the pillow and cried. And screamed. Lots of screaming into my pillow. There was a knock at my door.

“Go away.” I called.

“I'm coming in, whether you like it or not!” I heard my Mom's voice, as she entered my room.

“Renesmee.” she breathed when she saw me.

“What exactly happened?” she asked as she sat beside me. I put my hand on her cheek and replayed the entire incident.

“Oh, Jake.” she whispered when she saw his face.

“Renesmee Carlie Cullen, you have no reason to be so upset.” she scolded me softly.

“I just can't believe what I've done to my best friend.” I defended myself.

“I know the feeling.” she replied.

“Mom, I don't know what I've done. I want to date, but I don't wanna hurt Jake. I want everyone to be happy.” I explained.

“Shh, it's okay. Yes, it hurt Jake, but you told him he still has a chance and you meant it. He wants you happy. Even if it hurts him, you can't just lie and be unsure about your feelings and stay with him. One day, you would realize it and it would be too late. It's better now then too late. I still think, that you may be together one day, but you must go by your heart.” she advised me.

“Okay.” I stood up and went to my closet and fixed my hair.

“I'm gonna find a date.” I declared